Advice Needed - Finances

[terps21]

Hello,

 

I have been married for over 5 months now. My husband has been paying for this accident insurance for about 6 years. I feel like his financial advisor has been taking him for a ride, especially since my husband has been in debt for the last few years. We both work. We have separate bank accounts so technically he can do whatever he wants with his money, but we talked before we got married and decided that it didn't make sense for him to have this insurance. Well, he went to his advisor yesterday and low and behold he talked him out of dropping the additional coverage. I know this is very petty but for some reason it has been bothering me!! Any advice on how to tackle this issue?

[ghost69]

what is the coverage that is unnecessary? insurance isn't that much these days.

[terps21]

It's the accidental dismemberment or something like that (not resulting in death). I agree that insurance is a good thing, but he is even talking about getting some kind of cancer insurance.

[rocio]

I feel like his financial advisor has been taking him for a ride, especially since my husband has been in debt for the last few years.

 

You husband's debt is not the fault of his financial advisor. I'm a huge advocate of insurance of all kinds. It does cost money and you probably won't ever use it. But just having that kind of security is almost priceless.

 

I would recommend keeping the insurance and cutting back on other unecessary expenses.

[lady00]

Hello,

we talked before we got married and decided that it didn't make sense for him to have this insurance. Well, he went to his advisor yesterday and low and behold he talked him out of dropping the additional coverage. I know this is very petty but for some reason it has been bothering me!! Any advice on how to tackle this issue?

 

Do you feel disrespected? I agree with that that it seems "petty" but if I were you I would be upset because now that you are married, you're officially a team, you're in this together. What happened was you made a decision together and then he went and did the exact opposite. That is not respecting your ability to make decisions together as a couple. That would bother me more than the content of the actual decision.

[DN]

When you talked about dropping this insurance - was this at your suggestion or his.

 

I would be very reluctant to drop insurance. It is one of those things that is a nuisance and an expense - until you need it. Then it can make all the difference between living reasonably well or living in poverty.

[BellaDonna]

It sounds like it's AFLAC insurance?

 

I took it out myself "just in case".... and I have to say that I'm glad I did. It's comforting to know that if something happens (even though it's rare) that my husband and I will not be in a financial crisis and we'll have some help. It was not that expensive either. The Cancer policy actually sends you a check in the mail just for getting a routine prevenative cancer screening (like a routine pap smear or colonoscopy, etc. so it almost pays for itself.)

 

I'm not sure if this is the same insurance that your husband had, but the AFLAC was offered through my employer and when I took out my policy I told my husband I was taking it out (didn't ask) because I felt it was important for both of us. The money for the insurance is taken out of my check, pre-tax so I barely even notice my payments.

 

I think there are many other factors that contribute to debt that can be cut out, before opting to drop insurance.

 

BellaDonna

[terps21]

No idea who he gets it through. I don't even really think he knows. The decision was mutual, but I will admit it was pushed by me, reason being when I asked him what it was for he didn't really have a clue. Anyways, we do have life, homeowners, car insurance. I do think that maybe the reason it is bothering me is that we had discussed it at length and then in a split second he did a 180 on me. Thanks for all the comments, good to have someone else's point of view.

[rocio]

I would be upset too. He did not follow through on your agreement. If anything, he could have brought you along to the appointment with the financial advisor and discussed the decision with you. You have reason to be bothered.

[RayKay]

I don't think having insurance is ever a bad thing. Things that do cover disability are great as you can take them out while you are alive, and that really can help out when your income drops, and you cannot support yourself. Life insurance itself is good...but only pays you when you are no longer around!

 

The "cancer" insurance you talked about is actually a policy that covers illness, disabilities that you get in life and you actually get the cash while you ARE alive, so you can use to spend on medical expenses, family, vacations if you are terminal, whatever you want.

 

After knowing friends and family go through huge illnesses that really put them under emotional stress...it is a GREAT benefit to be less financially stressed as well.

 

Even better is that when you start these policies when younger and in good health, they are more affordable. And generally payments are quite small, as they figure it all out with mortality tables to figure out what their likelihood of paying out is and so on.

 

Why don't you go WITH him to his financial advisor and talk to him about it too so you know what it is really about? I used to work in finances, and generally for me we were looking out for our CLIENT'S best interests, not our own. Not everyone works on commissions either..so don't jump to conclusions he is doing it for himself.

 

Have you maybe considered that he has it as he also cares about YOUR well being if something happened to him?

[RayKay]

I wanted to just add...even if you are young, you NEVER know. When I was 22 my long term boyfriend of five years got very ill, and died from it.

 

My "sister in law" (since neither she or I are married!) went to a wedding this August for her best friend. The groom died the very next morning after his wedding. He was 35.

 

I know people whom have been diagnosed MS, cancer, been in terrible accidents and been disabled all in their 20's and 30's...so don't fault him for just wanting to take care of you.

[lady00]

I agree with what everyone said about the insurance being very important. But I think there are 2 issues here. One is the content/substantive aspect (which is do you need the insurance or not?) and the other is the decision-making aspects (can you make important decisions together and stick to them without going behind each other's backs?).

[Ash]

My take on this:

 

Accident insurance is in some ways even MORE important if you're in debt. If something happens, that's when you must have that insurance income. It's an extra slap in the face if something awful were to happen and not only could he no longer work, but by virtue of your marriage you'd be responsible for covering all the debt. If you're well off and everything is paid for then accident insurance is less important. All in my humble opinion of course.

 

You say this person is a financial advisor. Would I be correct in assuming the advisor is NOT the one trying to sell insurance? If he/she is not the salesperson then they really have nothing to gain by convincing him to keep the insurance so I would think the advice is genuine. It's not really a "behind the back" thing in my view. It's one of those situations where a couple make a decision perhaps based on not knowing or realizing all the ramifications and then when it's explained it makes more sense to recant. As others have said, I think it would be great if you could meet the advisor in person and have her/him tell you what your husband was told. It may ease your mind.

 

I'm in debt pretty much over my head but I'd never drop any of my insurance. If anything ever happened to me I need to know all my kids and partner are provided for.

[Hardrock]

Unless it is over $20 bucks a month, you are focusing on something petty. Pick your battles, grasshopper. If you still want to argue it, be logical in your argument, you need to do a better convincing job than the financial advisor.

[justpaisley]

It is a REALLY good idea to have AD&D insurance (accidental death and dismemberment). If your husband were to suddenly be rendered incapable of working through dismemberment, you'd get a big payout to take care of anything you need. My husband's AD&D policy is REALLY big, because I'd have to use it to go to school to continue to take care of our son - I'd never want to get rid of that.

 

If your husband's in debt, look at his other expenditures. Don't cut out insurance.

 

And if you think it's petty, it probably is. Pick your battles.

[chris585]

I am a Field Underwriter/Producer for Health and Life Insurance. We are a middle sized company who competes with the Major Medical Companies throughout the US. Our accident policies are definitely at par and better than most AFLAC policies and only cost 8 dollars per person per month, with cancer and Critical illness policies costing just about the same or a little more per month. These types of indemnity plans are very inexpensive...my question to you is do you have other insurance that these policies supplement? If the answer is yes, then it IS extra expense that you have to weigh the worth of. On the other hand, our supplemental plans pay out one lump sums instead of per treatment so you get the best of both worlds....price/benefits.

 

Remember the main rule here, you can never have too much coverage, as long as your financial situation permits, and thats totally not being biased because Im in the industry, its because its the smart thing to do.

 

One insightful thing I read here is that your husband doesnt know which company insures you, nor does he know the absolutes of the plan, and the benefits inside when you asked. My only qualm with that, and its major, is that his agent is making your husband trust him, and that alone isnt good enough. That agent should have made sure he knew exactly what he has insurance for, and outlined that to him...if you dont know what the benefits are and how they pay, how do you know youre getting what you paid for when its time to file a claim??? My assumption here is that you dont think the agent has your best interest at heart, and thats why you balk at the idea here, if the agent did a better job of explaining things to you both, then youd be happy with the decision for sure. MAKE THE AGENT DO HIS JOB!

[terps21]

Hello,

 

Thanks everyone for the advice. Without getting too detailed about my life story, etc., we both have separate financial advisors (we've had these before we started dating). Just to address a couple questions, he has had this supplemental insurance since before we started dating as well, so as much as I want to believe he is looking out for my best interests (and I am sure he is now, don't jump on me) I don't think that was the original intent. His insurance through work covers short term disability and has a LTD option available. So this is just supplemental insurance. I agree I do need to go with him for his next appointment. I think it would be a good idea, however, for us both to ditch our current advisors, combine our finances with a new one! And I will choose my battles as well, which I am learning is HUGE in marriage!

[terps21]

And I wish he had a better understanding of how he is covered! That's why I am not trying to blame the advisor, but for some reason it is not getting through. Hence, why I should go with him! Thanks everyone.

[ghost69]

think of the things you really don't need. if you have a policy that covers let's say windshield coverage. if you have a $100 deductible, there is no point in having the coverage since a windshield costs about that much. and if you pay for it monthly, there is no savings. and look at odds too.