THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE - SuperDave71

[Jinky]

Day 3, feel fine. Think she will crumble soon.

[Jinky]

11 weeks! It has rebound all over it.

[theredrocket]

day 15, 30 more to go

 

well I'm resigned to making it at least 3 weeks before I decide anything.

 

The pros of contacting her are that I've have fixed the issues in my life which I was not dealing with which where causing a lot of stress and frustration in our relationship. I feel like such a jack ass for not dealing with them sooner and they really only took two weeks of focus and effort to get done and it makes me sad to think that it took losing a relationship I valued to get me to do that. Contacting her, would allow me to show and tell her about this progress

 

the cons are it might be too late, or it might not make a difference and I would be hurt.

 

 

day 16, 29 days to go

 

I'm leaning towards calling her next week. Right now I am working on getting myself mentally prepared to not be phased by whatever happens with that. If I feel confident that I am there then I will, if not I will wait.

[Brokenhearted87]

16 days since he responded to contact. 10 days since I attempted any form of contact.

 

Can't believe he's cut me off.

[KaylaJoy]

11 weeks! It has rebound all over it.

That's what I'm thinking too. I'm sitting here crying, reading all his old emails...you know the ones...the ones where he expresses undying love and affection, there'll never be anyone touch his life like I did, I'm the best girlfriend on the planet, and then the real kicker, the one dated March 17 (not even 8 weeks ago) - this one was an angry one, where he stated very angrily that he had offered to marry me, raise my son as his own, love me, etc etc, and had I accepted his proposal he would be doing that now.

Now, just 7 weeks later, he is engaged to the woman he swore he'd never date.

 

I'm sad today. Feel cheated, betrayed, sad that I believed in such love, and it went away so easily. Disheartened. Just want to cry.

[Jinky]

I have to be frank. Is a 8 week, total knee-jerk reactor, the man for you? Obviously hes been hurt, thus the angry e-mails. It seems to me there is one MAJOR loser in this tale, and thats the women he said he'd never marry.

 

Its actually like a movie....

[Jinky]

She text me, just saying "hey howz you?"... Do i respond?

 

4 Days NC, thought she would crumble.

 

I dont wanna be pathetic and childish, but at the same time, dont wanna be a loser anymore?

[Oedi]

Day 2 NC

 

I got a haircut so looking at myself in the mirror won't remind me of her. I dyed it red so it'll be cool and i won't think about her when i check out my hair. I have to somehow return a book regardless of copyright laws that i was going to give to her as a present. I'm gonna try and get store credit hahaha. I went looking for a new job because my current job makes me think of her too much and i don't want that. All my friends at the place i work are sad because i told them i'll be leaving soon sucks to be funny and charming. I just wished i stayed that way for her but... eh i somehow fell into the great trap of relationships and i started to become needy, obsessive and clingy. Terrible thing, i never thought i was ever going to do that but i did. I feel really bad about it. I really do miss her. Her sad face when she said goodbye to me yesterday just makes me really sad. My friends tell me she's just a * * * * * but i just can't agree. I really want to get back together with her even though she said she doesn't think that we'll be together. I'm trying to move on in the event we just stay friends and i find someone else... although its hard. My feelings go from happy to sad to joyful, to flat and i have problems trying to not think about her. Its distressing and i just want to go back to normal so i can move on. I hate the pain and i want to make her happy again at least once so i won't remember that pained expression on her face when she said good bye to me.

[hfc65]

Trying to contact her after 7 weeks,she isn't replying to anything

 

Just looking for some closure

 

Is it breaking NC if they don't respond?

[AronSchneider]

Trying to contact her after 7 weeks,she isn't replying to anything

 

Just looking for some closure

 

Is it breaking NC if they don't respond?

 

I have a great tip when your ex is not responding.

 

Write to her: "Thank you for the help, I’m wondering if I can meet you so I can thank you in person.”

 

She will wonder what you mean and see you. It’s about giving something positive and then asks her if she wants to meet. It works with everybody.

 

I need one of my little less formal shoes because I’m going to the Opera House tonight so I will just call my ex on my way to my University and ask her if I can get my shoes. She lives on subway station from the University. I will do this in a couple of hours so it will be rather early. I have no time to pick those shoes later because I most spend like all day writing in the University library and then I need a haircut and then I’m going out for a dinner and just after that to the Opera. I haven’t seen my ex for almost 4 months. Last time we talked was 27 Marsh and she dumped me 17 Marsh so. It will be little exiting but I will just get my stuff, be there like 2 minutes or something.

[jiangkejia]

Day 5, two days ago he texted me asking me am I ignoring him, should i reply?

[Annonomous]

Day 7..? (I think). Well 2 days since i txt just to check she was ok after the whole having her drink spiked thing, however she replied saying a few things bout how she felt, nothing at all about me and her though and nothing flirty from either side. I am already starting to feel like i am moving on, been a month since the break up now and its been so good not being in limbo anymore as to what she wants because i have made the decision myself now that i am going to move on and that its for the best.

 

Got to arrange a date sometime soon with a girl i know who asked me if i want to meet up sometime soon (a girl i was previously seeing before i had to move away and now i am back near her again). She asked me out but i said i needed a little time before i could meet up as i have lots of Uni exams at the moment and need to stay focused on them.

 

All in all my life is looking up and im beggining to wonder why i ever was with my ex and how we lasted a year and a half...... we just werent compatible. Would like to be friends still in the long run but for the moment in time until i am 100% sure i am over her, the NC definitely needs 2 remain.

[Mustang]

I'm not even bothering to count the days anymore.

 

As I said yesterday, NC is making things worse in a way. It seems to be making me think of my ex more in a way because as time goes on I wonder if she's thinking about me in anyway. Then I start to panic and wonder if she's forgetting about me. It's annoying.

 

That said, I can't contact her because I don't want to look weak but I really really miss being able to talk to her. She was a huge part of my life and it kills me that she doesn't even seem that bothered about being friends with me. I don't expect her to contact me at all. Why would she? I'm guessing she doesn't see the point if she's got a new boyfriend. All her attention goes on him. Again, that makes it worse.

 

I'm just getting a bit fed up of it being all or nothing. She was my best friend too and I feel like I've lost two things now. I just want things to be "normal" again without all the game playing.

[KaylaJoy]

Nope don't respond...there'll probably be 1/2 a dozen more such messages....she wants YOU to care, even if she doesn't. Ego thing. Be strong.

[Brokenhearted87]

Mustang, I feel your pain on the best friend thing. My ex was mine too.......now he's blocked me from contacting him...life is fair huh....double whammy. At least in your case you guys are still on good terms, relatively.

 

17 days since he last responded to contact (good phone convo)....11 days since I last attempted to initiate contact.

 

 

I miss my best friend.

[Jinky]

She text me yesterday, i have no urge to reply. If she texts me a second time; i would reply. But, i think this will be us. She is not the kind of person to give if she isnt getting anything back.

 

I feel relieved, almost.

 

NC Day 4, Month since the break up.

[Mustang]

At least in your case you guys are still on good terms, relatively.

 

I'm not sure about that. I often think she's just being polite. That said, when we bumped into each other in March she was really nice. She bought me a drink, we hugged and hung out for a bit. Everything went away. Hiding behind texts and emails doesn't work when things are still a bit up in the air.

 

I know a lot of people say that I should just forget about her but I'm getting to the stage now where I'm thinking it doesn't have to be all or nothing anymore. Although, the difficulty is approaching my ex again genuinely just to see how she is because she will assume that it is part of some plan.

[mankow]

Hmmm

I think I broke NC again OK?

for the 6th time

This time I was very much better I managed to do it 26 days and that was really tough

And I really snapped in the most worst way, I broke many glass objects this morning did not go to work and spent day with my friends on bbq.

and I sent 4 or 5 messages to my ex and she answered me we have nothing to talk and I sent one more msg telling her whatever and she sent me 2 more messages to call her and I did that from my cell phone as I broke my phone this morning in the manic rampage breaking mirrors ashtrays and all kind of things and I think I really scared some demons and made them suffer and go away

So we talked over the phone for the first time after all those don't call me things. I don't want to rush things, but she even told me yes really told me she is open for going out with me for a cup of coffee later this month or whenever, and she really said it I am awake and somewhat sober, she said those words that she is planning me for coffee (woopsy)

Now what I think I am in NC to LC again because it is now on her to decide.

One more thing we will definitely talk more often now as we mentioned that in recent convo!!!!!!

[theredrocket]

day 16, 29 days to go

 

I'm leaning towards calling her next week. Right now I am working on getting myself mentally prepared to not be phased by whatever happens with that. If I feel confident that I am there then I will, if not I will wait.

 

day 17, 28 days to go

 

well 28 days if I go all the way to 45. As of right now I am unsure. Right now contacting her seems like a monumental task which is silly. It's not, and it would only be a big deal if I believe that it is.

[greywolf]

Beginning of Day 2 again. I'm not taking it well at all. She called me crying yesterday when I told her we couldn't talk anymore, and after that she just disappeared. I haven't seen her online anywhere. I know that she doesn't have to be online and I don't expect her to be, after all I told her we couldn't contact each other. But it just really makes me wonder what she's doing because this is a break in her routine.

 

I'm thinking of waiting one week and then see how I feel. I'll either contact her or decide that I can go another week.

 

But right now I am struggling just on the 2nd day.

[Jinky]

O.k i text her back after a whole day after.

 

She just text me back an hour later, and i text her back an hour after that but with a closed text.

 

Broke NC and i feel so bad for doing it. But its not as bad, considering she text me right?

[KaylaJoy]

Have done OK with NC today...kind of disgusted, which I guess is a good thing...didn't really miss him as much as I just miss being with somebody. I miss being in a relationship, having feelings for someone and they are returned. I miss feeling special to someone, and he made me feel special. Apparently (yes, you do hear sarcasm in my voice) I was not quite as special as I thought since I was replaced VERY quickly.

But overall, day 6 has been OK. I'm not much tempted to view his MySpace page, because I'm sure he's got it posted all over about their engagement, and I've already been slapped by him with a text message about it this week, I really don't want to read all about it on MySpace.

No, time is crucial to me now. I want to forget, move on, and be done with it.

[Litgirl01]

He emailed me today....wasn't particularly warm and it seemed to be just telling me that my stuff was coming back to me. He asked for me to tell him what is going on with me. I didn't respond.

[musashi]

He emailed me today....wasn't particularly warm and it seemed to be just telling me that my stuff was coming back to me. He asked for me to tell him what is going on with me. I didn't respond.

 

 

Kudos for not responding!

[Oedi]

NC day 3. Well... I started flirting again lol. I'm thinking of asking out other girls. There's 2 im interested again. She keeps on popping back into my head though and yea. Its like an everyday cycle lol. I miss her then i don't then i miss her then i don't. I feel free then i feel burdened by the memories with her. I think i'll be over her soon and we can talk as friends some time soon. ... Of course im gonna be a complete * * * * * * * and put up new pics on facebook to showoff my new haircut and haircolour with her in mind. She's gonna hate it... and yea i don't know what i'll achieve but i just feel really REALLY vindictive today. I feel like saying to the world im back! and im back better then ever! Today i was like 70-80% happy. Tomorrow i'll see a bunch of my friends and then i'll have a lot more fun lol and maybe i'll forget about it and just keep it as a normal memory... ok scratch that. not possible lol, i still can't stop thinking bout her without some kind of sentimentality. I'm sure this feeling will be over sooner or later. if it isn't... well i don't know when i'll ask out another girl lol. I think i'll send her an email to invite her to my bday party at the end of the month. I gotta make sure i'm over her by then. If not hahahaha it'd be weird but im sure i'll be over it. The hard part is over lol. Her sad face... welll i just try not to think about it. when i do i'll admit i feel a little sad but nothing as bad as yesterday. Singing a long to a few songs last night a lot really helped. I feel a lot better then before