theredrocket Posted May 4, 2008 Share Posted May 4, 2008 day 12 33 more to go the weekends are always harder and I miss her today. I got a lot of compliments last night about how much muscle I've added in the last 6 weeks which was nice. I think about what it would be like if I contacted her in a month and how if she is dating someone that will make me sad. We'll see how things are then but I'm having doubts now Day 13; 32 more to go Almost 2 weeks I missed my ex a lot last night or I miss having a girlfriend. I'm not sure. But I don't have any real desire to break NC. I need to start meeting people but where? Link to comment
KaylaJoy Posted May 4, 2008 Share Posted May 4, 2008 day 2 of NC with my most recent ex. I'm fine with it. Not much curiosity even as to what's going on with him. That'll come later I'm sure. Talked to my favorite ex (the one I wish wasn't an ex) today (sigh!)...about once a week or so I think I'm going break down and do NC with him, because he's the one I still love, and can't get over, and he tears me apart. So I broke my own rules today and invited him to hang out with me this weekend...he usually does it if I ask him to, but he doesn't hardly ever initiate it on his own. I figured I can only handle one NC at a time though, and he will be the toughest one of all! Link to comment
organik Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Called my ex today to wish her a happy birthday after 3 weeks of NC and a break up that was a month and a half ago. She was happy I called and did not forget her birthday, which I can't see why she would think I would forget, we were together for over 3 years and I've known her for over 4 years... kind of strange... but I have to say the conversation was good, we did a little catching up and I kept it short and sweet. Only thing that was weird was that when I said good bye I had to force myself to just say "Bye ****" instead of bye hun i'll call you tomorrow... it kind of saddens me that this was my last call to her... now it's in her hands if she wants to call me... which might not ever happen. Well back on NC forever... till the next girl comes around. Link to comment
greywolf Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 *sigh. I broke down and emailed her today. Just a hi, hope you're doing well sort of thing. so I hope i didn't mess up too bad. Link to comment
pumpkinmoon Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Im in NC but Im not even counting the days, I'm just doing it till i feel better about everything Link to comment
Litgirl01 Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Shoe is going on day one for the 50th time! he he Link to comment
hfc65 Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 If I try and contact with no response is that breaking NC? Link to comment
greywolf Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 damn. now I remember why I shouldn't contact her. I'm never satisfied by the reply She replied to my email being really friendly and asking me how I was doing and that she's having a wonderful trip. So of course the first thing that I think about is that she's having a wonderful time without me Link to comment
postscript Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 damn. now I remember why I shouldn't contact her. I'm never satisfied by the reply She replied to my email being really friendly and asking me how I was doing and that she's having a wonderful trip. So of course the first thing that I think about is that she's having a wonderful time without me No don't read it so negatively. She's feeling good and happy - which isn't necessarily a bad thing. She isn't rubbing it in your face! Why aren't you that happy? You need to try and have fun without her too. Link to comment
EyesOnThePrize Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Day 26 - I'm not going to have an issue getting to 30 days...I'm in real flux as to what to do at that point. There's a lot going through my head now. Today was the day the pet transport service came to pick up the cat I'm sending to my ex. It was tough. I love that cat, but I love my ex more, and I did agree she could have the cat. I hope I'll see it again and the possibility exists that I won't. That would suck. And I remind myself that my ex isn't seeing the other 4 cats or the dog, and I'm sure that sucks for her. My ex's sister called me today and we talked for over an hour. I got a bunch of background on my ex that I really didn't know, and that confirms and amplifies some things. I said to her "Well, I think the ex has more than just depression. I think she has a disorder." She says "You mean borderline personality disorder?" It turns out my ex's sister has a degree in psychology and is also very sure my ex has BPD. And she's known her a lot longer than I have. She is also sure that slimeball is a temporary thing. The funniest line was me saying something like "I don't think slimeball has really seen the crazy yet." And she says "And I think when he does, you'll hear the skidmarks!" Her sister is a good person and I probably would have been closer with her if my ex wasn't so anti-everything to do with family. It was a good talk, though. She's having a baby tomorrow who would have been my nephew. Well, I still wish her well. I saw Iron Man this evening...it lived up to the hype, as far as I was concerned. It will be on my buying list when it hits Blu-Ray. I got a terrible seat because I was talking to my ex's sister and got to the theater late (in the middle of the previews) and that's okay...the phone call was worth it and the movie still kicked butt. Tonight, I'll watch dumb TV shows on Fox and then crash early...I need some sleep! Link to comment
greywolf Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 No don't read it so negatively. She's feeling good and happy - which isn't necessarily a bad thing. She isn't rubbing it in your face! Why aren't you that happy? You need to try and have fun without her too. I know what you mean. I have been having a good weekend, but there are times when I miss her so much as well. I guess I was kinda just hoping for an 'I miss you' or something. *sigh There are times when I'm moving on and there are times when I take a step backwards and I think this was one of them. I mean, why should I care if she misses me right? Link to comment
wyrllish Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 I know what you mean. I have been having a good weekend, but there are times when I miss her so much as well. I guess I was kinda just hoping for an 'I miss you' or something. *sigh There are times when I'm moving on and there are times when I take a step backwards and I think this was one of them. I mean, why should I care if she misses me right? All completely understandable dude. But -abandoning hope is freedom-. Hell even with my situation I find myself needing to take my own advice. We were in NC for about a month and a half until she started to pour TONS of dramatic statements on me about us. So I start to reciprocate(very slightly)and what does she do? Ignores my texts. But I have to remember that I need to not expect anything, go into everything dealing with your ex w/o expecting anything at all. I still want my ex back after all this added crap from her *shrug* If you expect something from them you are likely not going to get it. A mutual friend of ours straightened me out and reminded me of what I need to do for the best result. Do not chase at all, basically. She may miss you or she may not to be honest but she will let you know in time. Best of luck of course, stay strong and keep on the path if you want the best outcome. Link to comment
postscript Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 I know what you mean. I have been having a good weekend, but there are times when I miss her so much as well. I guess I was kinda just hoping for an 'I miss you' or something. *sigh There are times when I'm moving on and there are times when I take a step backwards and I think this was one of them. I mean, why should I care if she misses me right? No of course, everyone takes a backwards step! I would have a few days of pure bliss then maybe one hour of alone time at home, and I would be reduced to a blubbering mess again! It's all part of healing. But soon the break downs become less frequent, or less painful and sooner or later a lot of time has passed and you realise you're feeling great again! Link to comment
Brokenhearted87 Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Day 8 on my side, day 14 since he replied or responded to any form of contact from me. Link to comment
uk_incoming Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Is NC broken if you respond to a txt or answer their call? Link to comment
eurocar Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Is NC broken if you respond to a txt or answer their call? Yes, as that contradicts the definition of no contact. Link to comment
Brokenhearted87 Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Is NC broken if you respond to a txt or answer their call? Em.......yes...very much so! Link to comment
theredrocket Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Day 13; 32 more to go Almost 2 weeks I missed my ex a lot last night or I miss having a girlfriend. I'm not sure. But I don't have any real desire to break NC. I need to start meeting people but where? day 14; 31 days to go Well I made it two weeks but I am strongly considering breaking no contact. I am going to give myself a week to think about it. I just want to get it over with and I'm not sure if another 3 weeks would make any sort of difference. I don't know, guess I'll see how I feel in a week Link to comment
uk_incoming Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Don't do it man! - Hold on to your butt!! You lasted 2 weeks, you can last another. Besides, I read somewhere the women won't start missing you until week 4/5 of NC. Assuming they didn't leave you for another person, or have started seeing someone else! Link to comment
theredrocket Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 I talked to a female friend who this "she's seems comfortable with how things are, because if she's weren't she would have contacted you, she knows where you stand" seems like good advice ok I'll do this. two more weeks which will be 28 days and the I'll evaluate how I feel then Link to comment
Jinky Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Just started a No-contact, although- somewhat enforced. Shoulda started ages ago. Why does it hurt so much? Why doesnt she care? I dont get it. *sigh* Link to comment
GoldenHillGuy Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Day..........???? I don't even know anymore. I guess that's a sign of improvement. I'm still dreading the day she comes back over to get her things. But, I'll take it in stride. This breakup could be the best thing that's ever happened to me. I'm learning so much about myself, and getting back in shape. Actually, getting back to the guy my ex met 2.5 years ago, but with a whole new look on relationships, and what some red flags are that I should've seen. Anyways, Stay strong everyone. And learn about yourself. Make yourself happy, then you're truly ready to love again. That's what NC is all about. Link to comment
HoTung Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Can someone tell me how long should NC last for? I lasted 24 days and then broke it. I called him and ended having an argument because i found out he had a meaningles kiss with a girl at a stag do 2 weeks beforehand ( he told me) he also said it was cos i ignored his call and email. When do boys actually start missing you? I am back on NC and have been for 11 days now. He texted me last sunday but there was no question so i didn;t reply. He said he was going to call and he hasn;t and usually when he says he wil do something he does I think i have lost him forever - don;t u think? Link to comment
greywolf Posted May 5, 2008 Share Posted May 5, 2008 Can someone tell me how long should NC last for? I lasted 24 days and then broke it. I called him and ended having an argument because i found out he had a meaningles kiss with a girl at a stag do 2 weeks beforehand ( he told me) he also said it was cos i ignored his call and email. When do boys actually start missing you? I am back on NC and have been for 11 days now. He texted me last sunday but there was no question so i didn;t reply. He said he was going to call and he hasn;t and usually when he says he wil do something he does I think i have lost him forever - don;t u think? So let me get this straight. You guys have broken up, and he kisses someone because you haven't returned his calls? You're not his girlfriend. You have no obligation whatsoever to contact him. If he did something like that, then it was his choice. And saying that it was your fault is manipulative and rude. Either he wants to be with you or he doesn't. He has to choose. Link to comment
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