so upset, is it really ending and I don't know it?

[SummerLove]

Many of you have read my past few posts these last few days about how my bf hasn't been giving me the time of day. I'm just so confused. I went to his house the other day and it was all fine and dandy, then he called me the next day cuz he needed a ride, but now that I call just to talk he gets all bent out of shape about it. Is he slowly breaking up with me? How do I respond to this? He says I'm annoying and that I b**** too much. I really don't get how asking why he hasn't called is B-ing, but whatever. I ask what his problem is and his response is "you are." What kinda crap is this? I just wanna know why he acts like I'm the most horrible person to talk to (even though I'm not). He won't answer me if I ask why he's acting this way... Should I just not call for a while? Should I just call and act like nothing is happening? TELL ME WHAT TO DO! I'm so confused!

[Hope75]

He got bent out of shape for you simply calling him?

 

Isn't that what normal couples do?

 

Sounds like he isn't treating you with much love and respect... how long have you been with him?

 

Has he always been this way?

[Beyondthesea]

I ask what his problem is and his response is "you are."

 

Honey, don't sit around and allow someone to treat you like this. He's not 'slowly breaking up with you', he's just a jerk.

 

I've dated men like this in the past, and you know what? There's absolutely no reason to do this and do everything in your power trying to make this guy happy. He's not happy with himself, it's not you.

 

Do yourself the biggest favor of your life: break up with him, and move forward with your head held high. Strict no contact and move forward!

[SummerLove]

That's the thing... this is just a recent thing. He's just been acting like this for maybe at the most 2 weeks. That's why I'm so confused.

[Goldfish6888]

You know you deserve more. Give him another 2 weeks, If he doesn't "up" his behaviour - you need to give him the heave-ho, I'm afraid. sounds like he is not ready for a "relationship".

[Freda]

Hi Summerlove,

 

I have been through something similar in the past and it turned out that his behaviour was down to family and work pressure that i had no idea about. If only he'd have opened up and talked, we wouldn't have gone through months of upset and arguments.

 

Unfortunately, some people find it hard to share their problems and worries. However, this situation still does not justify his behaviour and if it continues then i would suggest walking away. It will either shake him up and he'll realise he does love and want you or it will die off making it quicker and less painful for you. Either way you cannot let him treat you this way - you deserve better.

 

If he doesn't respect you then make sure you respect yourself.

 

 

Hope this helps a little

[Honey Pumpkin]

It sounds like he's being horrible to you so that you'll do the dirty job and dump him, rather than finishing it himself. Maybe give him one last chance to tell you what the problem is, then finish it. He's treating you really badly, and I don't think you should put up with it.

[RayKay]

Personally I don't think it matters if this is a "new thing" - that does not make it acceptable.

 

Do you really feel you deserve to be with someone whom bluntly tells you that YOU are his problem?

 

I think either he is trying to get you to break up with him, or is just trying to ease out of things and is seeing how crappy he can treat you in the meantime.

 

He is not respecting you, so it's time to respect yourself, and get out of this.

[rose2summer]

You need to set boundaries,

 

He has no right to treat you that way,

 

When my ex started doing that to me,

 

It was the beginning of the end,

 

And the end was very nearby,

 

A relationship is founded on love and respect,

 

Not ridicule, disrespect, and vulgarity,

 

I would avoid him for a little while,

 

And then when he calls, say,

 

I do not agree with you disrespecting me,

 

That is crossing my boundaries,

 

And if it happens again,

 

It is best we part our own ways,

 

Hugs!

 

I am sorry you are going through this,

 

But know that we care,

 

Rose

[Nikki23]

yes I agree with Rose. I made the mistake of allowing this to happen because I became too clingy and didn't have enough of a life outside my relationship, this meant his respect lessoned! Do you think this may be the case with you?

 

If not and your a respectful, independent girlfriend, then dump him. He will get a big shock and most probably be on his knees. Then you can decide if you want someone who will respect and appreciate you or you want to take him back. Good luck xx

[kellbell]

SummerLove,

 

Is this the same guy you were writing about in April of this year?

 

 

 

[kesea]

just don't call him ever again. there is no way to repair a relationship (and not even worth it unless you're married or have a kid) that has gone to one person being so rude to the other. Even if you were to tak him back after he treated you that way, it would be rewarding bad behavior and asking "can I please have some more". If you made some mistakes, just be glad you didn't make them on "the one", use this for the learning experience it is, and move on.