I don't care if it hurts... I wanna have control.

[CynicalGuitarist]

current mood: Schizoid

 

(haha, just HAD to take a dig at Myspace blogs)

 

Anyways, just as I declared I'd never let a girl get in the way of my life, she comes in. I had soooo much fun; drinkin' beer with one of my best buds, partying out, enjoying myself before college... yet then I meet her (a friend of a friend). She's not exactly model-perfect (though I am extremely attracted to her in many ways), but she (GHASP!) actually listens to what I have to say, and is a total sweetheart... So, I find her on Myspace, and I leave her a comment expecting not even a simple reply... then we start commenting eachother. I start seeing her as a good friend who is a gem in the sea of crappy, slutty, stubborn, stingy girls.

 

Then, my friend (who is a girl, and her best friend) tells me that this girl likes me. Of course, as I was buzzed off of 4 beers, didn't think much of it. Yet slowly (but surely) I begin to have extremely strong feelings towards her. Because every single girl (previously) I've ever liked as more than a friend had rejected me (horribly so), I don't know much about the subtlties of women. I have been (and still am) extremely enamored by this young woman's presense, and then started to think maybe I'm not such a loser after all.

 

Of course, all good things must come to an end. My old high school buddy (who knows both girls) tells me this girl I really really really like just got outta a relationship. I was crushed. I felt (and still feel) like a total butthole. Now I'm stuck in a shell afraid to reveal how I feel to her. My friends keep lying to me just to make me feel better, and that totally frickin sucks. I've been telling myself "forget her, Dave! She'll never wanna go out with your weird- * * * anyways!" but that just makes my feelings for her multiply.

 

I can't believe myself. This girl means the whole world to me. She's the cherry in my eye because she makes my sour world all the more sweeter. I love everything about her. I want her to be happy because she matters more to me than I matter to me. She has the best personality I've ever seen in a girl around my age. Anyone ever seen "Punch-Drunk Love"? Yeah, I'm pretty much turning into Adam Sandler's character. I've been yelling one minute, enamored the next, and apathetic after that.

 

I don't wanna tell her how I feel, because I don't wanna scare her. I can't tell her because my mind's not ready... but why do I have this subconscious voice telling me to follow through? She's so smart, beautiful, caring, funny, sweet, interesting, and intriguing. If she rejects me, it'll ruin me for a looooooong time. I'll shave my head and go back to pot, beer, and cigarettes. Don't give me any of this "don't do drugs! they're bad for you!" crap, but being 18 and without a significant other hasn't really been healthy for me either. This feeling for her is much more than just a feeling in my pants. I'm really hoping she sees me as I see her.

 

Radiohead's "Creep" has become a damn good description of how I feel right now.

[annie24]

hey - well, if she just got out of a relationship, then she is single! so... I think you should ask her out. go hang out with her. yes, you are taking a risk, but trust me, you will feel a lot worse if you don't ask her out, and some other guy does and she starts dating him. then you will have missed your chance.

 

she sounds like a nice girl and it sounds like she likes you too. go for it!!!

[Aschleigh]

This is why guys remain single. You don't get women, that's ok. I will let you in on a big secret:

We love it when someone nice likes us. We like hearing how special we are to you. We want to talk about cute loving things and be in love.

It seems you are affraid of rejection. You are already rejecting any chance you have by not talking to her. Think of it this way: If you risk telling her you like her, your chances are 50/50. Even better since your friend said she likes you. If you say nothing, you have no chance of ever knowing what could be. Rejection isn't that bad. It hurts the ego a bit. Not knowing what could have been: that should scare the * * * * out of you!

[mkmki]

If you are a gitarist... If you like girl that's just out of relationship... If you would be just two years younger... You would make me cry...

 

BUT!! Im to drunk right now... And my sweetheart Gittar-THE-Grate Tells this:

"Forget radiohead, they have bad gittarists. Forget loosers, becouse you are not one. And Freakin' Creeps are for the circus and you are not for one!"

So my opinion is:

 

-Who cares about relationship

-Who cares about friends advices

-Who cares about brain (mine stopped few days ago and Im fine)

-Who cares of loss (Rome didn't and concuered half of the world, ok maybe not half but...: )

-Care for your heart

-Care for this girl

-Care for you

 

And (this is the important part) now, DONT MAKE ME MAD!! IF YOU LIKE HER GO OUT WITH HER! IF SHE REJECTS WHO CARES!! YOURE PANTS WILL NOT!! YOUR MIND (on few beers) WILL NOT!! SO!!!!!!!!!!!! TALK TO HER AND REMEMBER: IF YOU DONT DO ANYTHING YOU WILL FEEL LIKE A LOOSER!!

 

Oh and this: If you don't ask her out Im (even if I wasn't in mood to play guitar for a looooong time) chalenging you to a guitar duel! If you lose you ask her out.

 

Good luck mate!

[eremy]

woah horsey...pull back on the reigns a little bit man. You aren't even WITH this girl yet, and already you love everything about her? you don't even KNOW everything about her. Take it one step at a time! And for God's sake show some confidence here! I bet she's a great girl, and I bet she's very lovable too, but what you're doing right now is putting the cart before the horse. Try asking her out on a couple dates, rather than just blurting out how much you like her...she'll get the hint from the dates. Try looking at some of diggity dogs posts...he's got great advice on stuff like this.

[CynicalGuitarist]

woah horsey...pull back on the reigns a little bit man. You aren't even WITH this girl yet, and already you love everything about her? you don't even KNOW everything about her. Take it one step at a time! And for God's sake show some confidence here! I bet she's a great girl, and I bet she's very lovable too, but what you're doing right now is putting the cart before the horse. Try asking her out on a couple dates, rather than just blurting out how much you like her...she'll get the hint from the dates. Try looking at some of diggity dogs posts...he's got great advice on stuff like this.

 

I agree... feelings totally suck and I wish I could control mine to not desire to ever fall in love (hence the title of the original post)... but it happens... I did (indirectly and unintentionally) ask her out for coffee, and she said she'd love to sometime... I guess this is really a major conflict between my soul and my brain.

[mc79]

You already know her, talk to her, the initial ice has been broken, so ask her out - nothing easier. If she agrees, set up a simple adventure/romantic date. Don't just take her out to the movies (probably worst first date idea). Take her to a lake shore before sunset, to a park to feed ducks, miniature golf (little competitiveness can spark lots of things). Use a date as a way to express your personality but don't overdo on expressing your feelings yet. Keep 'em to yourself for now and build up the pressure in her until she can't take it anymore.

Have fun, be creative, stick out of the "crowd". If you're unique she'll go gaga on you man.

Good luck.

[madhornet]

Now I'm not the experienced guy when it comes to dating, girlfriends or relationships (I'm 30 in 12 days, never had a girlfriend and had 3 dates only 1 of which went onto the 3rd date).

 

Mc79 has the right idea, try and do something away from the norm. The best thing you can do is to stay true to who you are - as cliche as that may sound. If you try to be someone you think women are looking for then you will just find the wrong one for you.

 

Believe me I know from experience... it may take a long time but you are far better staying true to yourself and sitting out for the right person. I have rushed things in desperation some years ago and been hurt on numerous occasions.

 

It definitely won't fall in your lap. I have much less chance of finding love at my age I must admit - but any single Watford supporters in the UK are always welcome to meet up with me for a drink!