So What Would You Do If You Found Out Your Other Half Was Cheating?

[BurningInside]

Topic title says it all. Personally I'd kill her. But I'm a bit mentally twisted.

 

But what would be your reaction?

[Ians Mommy]

I've never been cheated on and I've been in plenty of relationships (not long term though).

 

I've always thought about what would happen if I did get cheated on. If he or she straight out told me that they cheated on me, I would think that they regretted it to have been able to tell me. If I found out from someone else, I don't think I'd give the person a second chance but if they told me they'd get one chance to prove themselves.

[Hope75]

I would be upset- I would want to know why, want to talk about it. Depending on the circumstances, I'd likely leave him. BUT... there are exceptions I guess, and I couldn't really say honestly what I'd do unless I was in the situation.

 

I think killing is terrible and not to mention that your whole life would go down the toilet as you spent life in prison. Do you HONESTLY think cheating warrents taking someone's life?

[Lady Bugg]

I second Hopes answer. I'd be hurt..wanna know why...would probably leave.

It's tough to say unless you're in that situation.

 

I defientely wouldn't kill over it. NO one is worth that. period.

[southerngirl]

Honestly I do not know what I would do. I have never cheated on anyone. I'd like to think that would be the day I made plans to leave. Its a real violation of a relationship. I have been cheated on before and I ended the relationship right then and there. Although it was someone I was dating.. so it was rather easy to cut him off.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

Topic title says it all. Personally I'd kill her. But I'm a bit mentally twisted.

 

But what would be your reaction?

 

If I were you, I wouldn't go around saying things like that, and especially putting them in writing. If a girl you date or even like ever does end up missing or dead, you could be implicating yourself.

[shes2smart]

I did catch my ex cheating on me.

 

I vented my spleen is a way that skewered him verbally six ways to Sunday, capping it off with "I never want to see or speak to you again."

 

Lessee...that was, oh, 5 years ago and I have held true to that "never want to see or speak to you again" sentence. When he e-mailed me 2 years ago, my husband answered the e-mail.

[violingirl]

My ex-boyfriend did cheat on me with 2 ex-girlfriends while we were together, but I didn't find out until after he broke up with me (he emotionally cheated and left me for one of them; he physically cheated on me (made out, etc.) with the other one only 5 days after I took him on a trip to meet my parents for the first time).

 

If I had found out about his cheating while we were still together, I would have dumped him immediately, if not sooner. However, that didn't happen. Instead, he hid it all from me. He only just told me about the incident where he physically cheated on me - it's been a year and a half since the breakup. It upsets me, but not as much as it would if we were still together. I'm still not sure what to do about it (my ex and I are trying to be friends), but I do feel sad and angry about it.

[Jinx]

I suppose for myself it would depend on the kind of relationship and level of attachment we had prior to finding out the lovely tidbit of information. I have been there, way back when it seems now, but we had only been dating oh say, a month or so.

 

It didn't matter too much, little hurt, but things heal. I wasn't that deeply attached, so when I found out there was less to lose emotionally for me. I simply moved on and that is life. My second and now third relationship, would most likely cause(d) me more emotional unhappiness than that first should something like that come up. I just have made the commitment to myself though that should it happen there are no second chances and no contact. Keep it simple, for me.

 

I would never murder someone, regardless of what they've done. It just is pointless to me anyhow. Not worth the sentence, and if nothing else it would put their own issues to rest, send you a jail sentence, family embarrassment, even if you weren't convicted in the end somehow, you'd have the fear element from such thoughts and statements openly admitted like as here. I would think in the end, you'd be the villian and somehow in a twisted notion the murdered would be the hero despite the infidelity fact, they were not spilling blood.

 

For that, I don't even do petty vengeance, usually in my life I find truth in what goes around comes around. In most cases a person can only do something and get away so many times before they cause themselves an excess of grief, I surely don't need to be spoon feeding it to the person.

[yeawutever]

Killing him, lol, no need to, I don't believe in killing people, we're all humans afterall.I would smile in his face and be like "Uh bye now you had your chance" and walk away. Why bother asking for explanation, why bothering listening to pathetic excuses??

Or I have a better idea, I would not even bother confronting him, I would go straight to NC with him and disappear, walk away so fast, he should figure out why. If he keeps calls and calls till the piont of iritating me, I'll just be like "I don't want to be with you anymore, don't ask why, bye". OH yea, I must be soooo evil!!!!!!!!!

[Majoraslayer]

I would probably regularly visit eNotAlone and drown in my own sorrows

 

Oh wait, that sounds familiar >_>

[BurningInside]

If I were you, I wouldn't go around saying things like that, and especially putting them in writing. If a girl you date or even like ever does end up missing or dead, you could be implicating yourself.

 

Seriously, they're not that clever and they'd have no idea who it was. Its not going to happen though so its all good.

 

Those who just say you'd give them a verbal slapping. Thats just nothing. At least partially ruin their lives which they will have done to yours if you really care for them.

[RayKay]

The best "revenge" is living well. Besides, ultimately, our own actions determine in life how we will live and be treated. If they have cheated, they will pay the consequences sooner or later.

 

If I found a partner was cheating on me (and I have in the distant past) I would be out the door, pure and simple, and moving on with my life. They would not deserve me, and losing me would be enough of a consequence in my mind.

 

I would NEVER physically harm them, or seek revenge, I just think that speaks more of you...and ruins YOUR life too. I cannot even comprehend why someone would even consider murdering someone, not only is that vile and inhumane and well, terrible but..is someone whom cheated on you really worth YOU ruining your life (and also meaning you miss out on the chance to move on, live happily and meet someone whom deserves you and treats you with respect?).

[shes2smart]

Those who just say you'd give them a verbal slapping. Thats just nothing. At least partially ruin their lives which they will have done to yours if you really care for them.

 

A lot of people (myself included) believe that what comes around goes around...worded differently...whatever you send out into the world via your actions comes back to you.

 

I've been fortunate enough to see this in action.

 

The thing is, anything you as an individual could come up with (no matter how devious or clever you think you are) to "ruin" an ex's life is nothing but a minor inconvenience compared to what happens when their own actions come back to haunt them.

 

Revenge meted out by you, while it seems good in theory, is never as satisfying as one might think. It only winds up clouding your own mind and soul with negativity...which in turn will serve to attract more negativity to your life.

 

Also, there is absolutely no reason to give someone so much control and responsibility over your life that their actions "ruin" your life. Former romantic partners have done plenty of things to cause me a laundry list of pain, grief, dispair, humiliation, depression, inconvenience, physical injury, near-poverty and so forth....but allow their actions to "ruin" me, take the joy out of life, or hold me down for any considerable length of time? Never. I am stronger than that, and I take more responsibility for myself and my life than that.

 

The only person who has the power to "ruin" your life is ultimately, you.

[Hope75]

Couldn't have said it better myself, RayKay.

 

The very best revenge is moving on with your life without them and being happy and fulfilled.

 

Revenge just poisons us and brings us down to the level of the cheater. I would prefer to handle myself with dignity and class, remove the offender from my life if need be, and let karma take care of the rest.

[helpme2]

I would be very hurt, and probably go into counseling for it, and drag his dumb butt along with me, because seriously something would have to be way wrong in the relationship for him to cheat on me.

[blackend heart]

first off i would probbably drink my self stupid, u know a few largish bottles of vodka once i had finished my alcaholic binge, i would continue to find the guy that stole my girlfriend away from me and beat the living daylights out of him, i have a butt end of a pool que that i have had weighted at one end so its got a better swing (i did that because i had a period of extreem paranoia where i didnt sleep but sat on my bed all night with said pool que watching the doors and windows). i would then go back to my Gf and talk to her and ask why she did it, what it was i did wrong, and change so that it wouldnt happen again and i would forgive her with time, i mean what is a relationship without its obsticals (perhaps im a bit of a push over ??), but all through this i would not blame my GF its either the guy or it was me, or both...

[Majoraslayer]

Well, I can speak from experience. My ex was a professional cheatswoman, certified and contracted with Satan himself. She cheated on me with every guy she came in contact with at some point or another, yet could still look me in the face with a smile, kiss me passionately, and swear she would always love me.

 

Karma; feh. I used to believe that life was full of justice, but now I'm not so sure. Somehow, I've been the one that has poured myself into the relationship and had her ruin my life TWICE. Both times, she came out of the relationship in love with someone else while I'm left rotting alone in the gutter. She's incapable of remorse, as that would require a heart. Succubi can only act as though they have a heart, whereas they're really feeding off of yours.

 

In all honesty, I've never seen anything that emotionally hurt me more than my true love's infidelity. It tore my parents apart when I was still at a very young age, and as a result I've been stuck between two parents who hate each other all my life. Death is easy to deal with; the person you care about has moved on to a better place and no longer has to suffer. Infidelity has no positive side to comfort you; in the end you're just left in the cold to waste away until you find the personal strength to move on.

 

Some people do move on, whereas some are scarred for life. I've found myself to be the latter, as my mistrust for everyone alive has been nothing but a constant relationship issue. If you want a survey of the most extreme ways infidelity is handled by the one who has been hurt, one need only to read up on suicide statistics or talk to prison inmates. My dad works at a prison; I estimate about 75% of the inmates are there as a result of what they did because of a cheating lover. Thats not an exact figure, but it is where most of the stories originate.

[Oldboy]

I did catch my ex cheating on me.

 

I vented my spleen is a way that skewered him verbally six ways to Sunday, capping it off with "I never want to see or speak to you again."

 

Lessee...that was, oh, 5 years ago and I have held true to that "never want to see or speak to you again" sentence. When he e-mailed me 2 years ago, my husband answered the e-mail.

 

That is just the coolest thing I ever read.

[puppeteer]

well since i just found out that my wife is cheating on me, and has recently told me that her sex life with this other guy is "none of my business", if you can believe that...

 

i guess i would do exactly what i am doing.

 

being sad, being really frickin angry, and pushing forward with getting a divorce.

 

she want's to be with him...okay...fine...sign the papers and let me out.

[Majoraslayer]

....wow, that REALLY sucks.

 

I advise you try what helped me feel better: link removed

 

Not only will you enjoy the power-packed masculinity shoved into one website, but the laughs will take your mind off of the pain. It helped me rebuild my self-esteem, for sure.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

....wow, that REALLY sucks.

 

I advise you try what helped me feel better: link removed

 

 

 

I hate women dot com??

 

That doesn't sound like a very healthy attitude either.

[Majoraslayer]

There's an link removed managed by the same people. The whole purpose of both sites is to find humor to feel better when bad things like this happen.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

That'd be It, basically.

 

Cheating = End

[OceanEyes]

I think it depends on the relationship. I had a guy I dated years ago cheat on me .. just after high school. We had been dating for a few months, and I found out from a mutual friend. I really didn't care enough about him to make a HUGE deal out of it. I just left one day while he was in the shower and didn't take his calls anymore. Period.

 

If my current boyfriend cheated on me, I wouldn't even want to be his friend. I really wouldn't talk to him ever again. First, I'd seduce and sleep with his best friend (or even better, his brother AND his best friend), then I'd pack my crap and be gone for good.

 

You can't leave a long-term relationship, cheated on, and not leave a 'parting gift' of some kind. There is no way that I'd stand for that kind of hurt and disrespect and not inflict some of my own before slipping away into the night. Sorry, but its only fair.