Do you think there'd be any way I could get proof that it's possible for women...

[Ross_K]

to be attracted to me offline?

 

What could I do? (and no, there's no way I could just walk up to some girl and ask her out)

 

Thanks.

[BellaDonna]

Hey Ross, I think you should stop being so hard on yourself.

 

With that said- maybe the internet is not the best dating venue for you. You might be better off going out and getting more socially involved and meeting people in person. That way there are less guessing games. It also gives you a social circle- whether or not any romance comes out of it. Go out and have some fun.

 

 

BellaDonna

[ElektraHere]

Proof? What are you asking? All I can say is that a woman is attracted to confidence and belief in oneself. If you or anyone needs to get reassurance about themselves asking if they can catch the attention of a woman or a man lack confidence.

[Ross_K]

Yeah but confidence isn't enough on it's own.

 

And how can you expect me to be confident in attracting women, when not a damned one has ever shown interest in me offline?

 

Hey Ross, I think you should stop being so hard on yourself.

 

With that said- maybe the internet is not the best dating venue for you. You might be better off going out and getting more socially involved and meeting people in person. That way there are less guessing games. It also gives you a social circle- whether or not any romance comes out of it. Go out and have some fun.

 

 

BellaDonna

 

I've done all that before for years, but, surprise surprise, nope, no interest in me shown what so ever.

[tylercdurden2004]

Yeah but confidence isn't enough on it's own.

 

And how can you expect me to be confident in attracting women, when not a damned one has ever shown interest in me offline?

 

You have to hire a private investigator. I dont recommend Magnum for this job though.

[BellaDonna]

And how can you expect me to be confident in attracting women, when not a damned one has ever shown interest in me offline?

 

That is circular reasoning. It's not going to help your situation.

 

Confidence is not only about believing in your ability to "attract women". It's about YOU liking the person that you are, and feeling good about yourself in general.

 

 

BellaDonna

[Ross_K]

I do like me.

[Ross_K]

You have to hire a private investigator. I dont recommend Magnum for this job though.

 

I think I need to pull out all the stops and hire The A Team.

[tylercdurden2004]

I think I need to pull out all the stops and hire The A Team.

 

Why hire a whole team when you can hire one man who can do the work of a whole team: MacGuyver!

[Beyondthesea]

Ross buddy, you need to stop looking for a woman and work on yourself first.

[Ross_K]

I haven't seen much of MacGuyver, but he seems more like a building gadjets kinda guy to me. I need some peeps who can go undercover and bug rooms and stuff.

[tylercdurden2004]

Give him bubble gum and straw and hes set.

[Ross_K]

Ross buddy, you need to stop looking for a woman and work on yourself first.

 

If I could just get the proof though, it'd help so much.

[Beyondthesea]

Proof of what?

[Ross_K]

Proof of what?

 

That it's possible for women offline to be attracted to me.

[Andy223]

so by saying that no women has been attracted to you offline before... you are saying that you "think" you arnt good looking? Mate you arnt bad lookin at all (im not gay) but i can tell you arnt.

 

let me tell you something, i have a mate of mine who is anything "but" good lookin and he finds women left right and centre...

 

from reading your posts i seem to get this impression from you "If only I______ then i would be more confident" As belladonna says "this is circular reasoning"

 

You said "And how can you expect me to be confident in attracting women, when not a damned one has ever shown interest in me offline?"

 

your attitude towards being confident with women is that you need to have success in the area in which you seek it.

 

WRONG!

 

this is not how you get confidence... confidence comes first. Then after you have created it, you can expect all the good results that come!

 

hate to break it to you, but coming online here and saying that you have no confidence with women is bad. You said "Is there anyway a girl can be attracted to me offline" I looked at that and shook my head. That kind of negative self talk serves no positive purpose, so eliminating it can only benefit you.

 

ps: You dont need the whole A-team... just MR T!

[Beyondthesea]

Well if you were more involved outside the house you would see proof of that silly. That's why I say work on yourself. Once those types of anxiety are lifted, it's much easier to become what 'women want.' Someone who is kind, approachable, good hearted, etc.

 

If you spent more energy on working on you and were confident & happy with yourself, you wouldn't need the constant approval of women. I guess that's my main point. If you are happy by yourself, that's what women find attractive.

[Ross_K]

so by saying that no women has been attracted to you offline before... you are saying that you "think" you arnt good looking? Mate you arnt bad lookin at all (im not gay) but i can tell you arnt.

 

let me tell you something, i have a mate of mine who is anything "but" good lookin and he finds women left right and centre...

 

Maybe it's a good photo and I look way way worse in real life, maybe I don't produce pheremones...

[Ross_K]

Well if you were more involved outside the house you would see proof of that silly. That's why I say work on yourself. Once those types of anxiety are lifted, it's much easier to become what 'women want.' Someone who is kind, approachable, good hearted, etc.

 

If you spent more energy on working on you and were confident & happy with yourself, you wouldn't need the constant approval of women. I guess that's my main point. If you are happy by yourself, that's what women find attractive.

 

I was way more involved outside the house, had loads of friends and everything (I was still quite shy though) but I still never saw proof of it.

 

Plus how can I be happy by myself, when I've been without a woman for the whole of my life?

[tylercdurden2004]

Plus how can I be happy by myself, when I've been without a woman for the whole of my life?

 

Mate you just might be. The grass isnt always greener. I know.

[Daddy Bear]

uncle bent wants a word with you.

 

*slap* how many ways do i have to say this?

 

information i've gathered, Magnum P.I.-like, from your posts:

 

you admit that you're not unattractive.

 

you have a fine sense of humor.

 

you treat women with kindness and respect.

 

that's all a man needs to attract a mate!!! let that sink in for a minute.

 

 

so... what's wrong again? answer me, boy!

[southerngirl]

Ross, go to a gym and take up working out. This will eventually give you more self confidance and make you feel better about yourself.

 

Honestly looks are not important, have you seen some of the 'ugly' people that find love? Really, your being way to hard on yourself.

[Andy223]

Talk to a girl, get to know her a bit and ask for her phone number. Later on ask her on a date. If she says "no" does it really matter? Compare that to everything else going on in ur life and in the world and you will see that a women's disapproval is insignificant in comparison.

 

And guess what!? you will need belief in yourself to do this. You will need "Confidence" to do this. Actually sit back and understand what this word means... it means "Having belief in your abilities" think about it, cos i dont think u really understand what confidence is mate. The thing is, it is the males role to ask the girl out, thats the way it is so stop gettin annoyed about it and Just Accept It!

 

imagine this from a girls point of view, she is sitting around twiddling her fingers waiting for some guy to stop being shy to just get up and ask her out! be proud of your role, that you are the hunter... not the prey.

 

Don't give women far too much power over how you feel...

 

A women's disapproval of you should not effect your self asteam in any way.

[Ross_K]

Mate you just might be. The grass isnt always greener. I know.

 

So you'd be more happier to have spent and to continue spending the whole of your life being single, never even being intimate with a woman?

[Ross_K]

uncle bent wants a word with you.

 

*slap* how many ways do i have to say this?

 

information i've gathered, Magnum P.I.-like, from your posts:

 

you admit that you're not unattractive.

 

you have a fine sense of humor.

 

you treat women with kindness and respect.

 

that's all a man needs to attract a mate!!! let that sink in for a minute.

 

 

so... what's wrong again? answer me, boy!

 

I've never admitted I'm not unattractive, I wish I could step outside of myself and see how I really look in real life.

 

What's wrong? I wish I had the answer, then maybe if there was someway to fix it I could do and then look forward to attracting women, having relationships and flings.