so nervous about school...

[teacup]

im supposed to be in class right now, but i skipped it to sit here typing. i was supposed to be turning in a paper, but i didnt do it. im beating myself up again. i havent timemanaged or cracked open a textbook. it is into 3 weeks and a half of university and there is still time left, but i am letting my anxiety, fear, procrastination, obessions stop me.......

 

im not doing the things im supposed to do again. im worrying and gnawing away at my thoughts and my mind. im not controlling myself. im not being responsible or productive. i give myself excuses like im too tired, i need to nap, i need sleep or i cant do this.

 

gah. GAH!!!!!! i need to finish school and to get good grades. i need to be studying. what is wrong with me?

[renaissancewoman101]

Nothing's wrong with you. You are just letting everything get to your mind and paralyze you from doing something productive. I get like that a lot. I got like that when I was in school, hence why I am STILL trying to get my masters in teaching, and I also got like that right before I moved out to San Diego from Milwaukee. Sometimes you just have to grin and bear it and take small steps. That was what people was telling me. I was looking at driving out here by myself, packing away 15 years of my life out in Wisconsin, saying good bye to friends I had known, leaving a stable long-term job, and getting over a broken relationship. I felt so overwhelmed and felt like sticking my head in a hole and ignoring everything. But people from here and from another site I post on kept telling me to take one small step at a time and look at it from the perspective of packing one box, throwing away one trash bag, then it doesnt look so overwhelming.

 

If you compartmentalize it into smaller bundles, it wont look so overwhelming and it will be easier to handle/tackle.

[LostInMyThoughts]

what is wrong with me?

 

Nothing. You sound normal to me. Many people procrastinate.

 

If you're getting all anxious, take the rest of the day off and go have fun.

 

My freshmen year of college, I had 4 exams all on friday. I knew that I hadn't prepared for any of them, and after taking the exams, I knew I bombed every single one of them. I felt like crap, and I wanted to crawl under a rock and die. Right before I went looking for the rock, I stopped by my advisors office and had a chat with him and told him that I felt like garbage because I bombed all 4 of my exams.

 

He just said to go out that weekend and have a lot of fun and not to worry about them. I took his advice and had a blast. Of course on monday I got my exams back and I did poorly on all of them (I even got the lowest score in the class on my Honors Chem exam!). But I was prepared for the shock, and I shrugged it off.

 

2 years later, I graduated with flying colors, got a great job, and haven't looked back since.

 

All I can say is, its tough right now, but if you don't let it get you down, you'll be okay in the end.

 

Go and have fun!

[CarnelianButterfly]

I get depressed and just want to sit and vegetate. I've gotten behind grading papers and the Prof's not happy, but I've found getting my butt in gear actually makes me feel better. I'm moving the focus from my emotions to my work, that's probably why the students think I'm a b***h of a grader.

[LostInMyThoughts]

...why the students think I'm a b***h of a grader.

 

Haha, I was such a mean grader; unless it was someone in my fraternity

[Tigris]

I agree just take one small step at a time.

 

Don't forget that even babies have to learn to crawl before they can walk and run. That's what you have to do!

 

Good luck and take care.

[the yang to the worlds yin]

i know how you feel, but tigris is 100% right. take your time, ease into it, force yourself to do a little work each day, but get into the habbit of at least doing something each day, it'll build self-discipline which sounds like the perfect presciption for your current problem. and you know what, just be sure to remind yourself of how great your doing when you do start to get things done anmd get back on track. reward yourself with something special and remind yourself why your there in the first place. i really do wish you all the best of luck.