he can't like me, I'm FAT and UGLY

[gymlexi06]

Ok there's this really good looking guy I work with. And I mean he's really good looking, whenever girls comes to Target(that's where I work) they always flirt with him, he's done modeling, etc. But the thing is, I think he likes me. We talk a lot, he always wants to go on break whenever I do, he always makes eye contact with me and smiles, even if we're not talking or anything, he always like comes up to me and puts his hands on my shoulders. The problem is, I don't see WHY he would like me. I'm like 20 lbs overweight and I'm not exactly good looking. There are a lot of girls our age who work there too who are MUCH better looking than me, but he doesn't act towards them as he does to me. I'm a nice person and I'm outgoing, but usually really hot guys care more about looks in girls. He cares about his appearance so much, so why would he like me? I also have a huge crush on him but I'm not expressing it to him because I don't know if he likes me or not, even though he acts like he does. Has anyone been in a situation like this? What did you do?

[DN]

I'm a nice person and I'm outgoing,

 

Perhaps you should give him credit for not being shallow enough to overlook these attractive qualities.

[Msnak]

What to do? First, make sure you feel confident around him. What would help you get to that point? A favorite outfit? Treating yourself to something special? A new lipstick?

 

You make it seem as if no one would want to take the time to know you, but indeed, you sound like an interesting and witty person.

 

Approach him in private and ask if he'd like to go for dinner one evening after work. Perhaps name your favorite restaurant or food?

 

But I'm guessing you won't be able to do it...until you feel better about you. Find at least five things about you that are unique or things you like about yourself and focus on that.

 

You'll be just fine!

[sidehop]

Ok first of all, 20 lbs is not really overweight. I know women are more sensitive when it comes to weight issues but that's not even considered fat. Besides, it sounds like he's showing you some good signs, just believe in yourself and if you really like the guy go for him.

[CarnelianButterfly]

Beauty is a subjective idea, we each have our own concept of what we find attractive. Those other girls maybe physically beautiful, but you could be an even more beautiful person. There are men in this world who put personality before waistlines and pretty faces. Give him a chance and give yourself a chance to be happy with who you are.

[ilovecats]

I think that you are being way to hard on yourself! What if he is the kind of guy that thinks looks don't matter?He probably likes the person that you are inside.It seems like you two have fun together.Maybe he likes your personality.Sounds like he likes you! I think you should try asking him out.And see where it goes from there.Who knows,might be a match made in heaven!!

[Dako]

If you're tall enough see over the checkout counter at Target, 20 pounds is nothing.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

Of course he can like you, I think you sound nice just by reading your post!

I was more than 20lbs overweight when I had my first serious boyfriend. And it really isnt all about weight/physical stuff...when I was *very* thin I had NO ONE. At all. No one paid me any attention. Im still very slim but I stopped obessing so much about what I looked like and just started living a bit. Lifes all going a bit wrong in my world right now but I still stand by what I say. Go for it.

[Süsser Tod]

The problem is, I don't see WHY he would like me. I'm like 20 lbs overweight and I'm not exactly good looking.

 

 

OK, I'm not good looking and no girl cares about me, but here are my two peso cents.

 

There is a girl @ work, she is overweight, about 40 pounds (if not more), and I'm seriously attracted to her! Why? I don't have a clue. Maybe it is because of her personality, some charm, or that special something I can't explain.

 

Oh, and I'm not the only one that feels like that about her. Maybe you're idealizing the "perfect" girl on every magazine and TV show and expecting only them to be attractive.

[_Tiki_]

It sounds like he likes you for who you are inside. Don't let your weight hold you back! 20 lbs isn't too bad anyway. Wether hes looking friendship or more it sounds like he just likes to be around you.

[jurupa]

I am sorry but I find this funny becuase my moms friend has a someone in her family that does modeling and from what I am told he is a knock out. He did date model girls, but ended up dating this girl that was average looking and not even close to model material. From what I was told when he first ask her out she was shock to say the least and then he said he wanted to marry her and she was in shock from this as well.

 

Just becuase the other girls are thin and have attractive bodies, doesn't mean guys will go for them. A lot of girls use their looks to get guys and not their personalities and brains to get guys. I know us guys are more attracted to physical things, but that doesn't last long. The guy went for you becuase he is attracted to you and not to the thin girls that you work with.

[FamousAmos]

he may like you for your personality, dont think negitive OR

he might just like you as a friend to hang out with

[FamousAmos]

but yes, im not bragging or anything but im pretty dam good looking, and sometimes when i talk to not so good looking girls, but if their personality is above 9 out of 10 then i am attracted to her..i just dont know why? maybe its because i know i have a defiante chance with her. but when a hot girl with good personality talks to me, i dont get quite attracted...because i know theyre being fake, trying to look nice when they talk to me, but a mean b!tch to lower people

[v-neck]

I prefer a girl who isn't 'perfect', meaning she doesn't have a swim-suit body. I will admit I do like girls with attractive faces, but it's more than that. Maybe he see's you as someone who doesn't act like the girls he used to dealing with and is attracted to that. Girls who are overly flirtacious and insincere can be annoying... I wouldn't ask him out though, but maybe give him some flirting back, he'll ask you out if he sees that and likes you.

[watupgangsta]

haha i told a girl that i liked that i thought she was sexy and she was like no im "fat and ugly" exactly like you said... she didn't get it. i told her she was perfect. you never know whos going to be attracted to who, and there ARE people out there who care about inner qualities.

[Kyoshiro Ogari]

I was going to give some advice to the original poster, but I noticed that over 1100 people viewed this thread... then I realized it's a two year old thread.