Loving me

[xcountryprincess]

I'm starting to realise that i'll never truly be happy if i don't accept myself and love me for me. I'm having a hard enough time trying to find who i really am and i just don't like me. Everywhere i turn there's someone prettier, or thinner or hotter or sexier and it's really bringing me down. I know there's always going to be people that are better than me, thats just how life is. But how do i learn to love me?

 

I tend to get really shy around guys because i'm thinking "why would they want me when they could have her." This means i don't go after what i want. I'm so afraid of taking risks and looking like an idiot that i feel i'm missing out. I know i'm missing out. I see all my friends dating and getting excited about guys liking them and wanting to be with them and it just gets so depressing. It's like, what's wrong with me? I know i should just give it time but i'm a junior in high school, how much time is enough?

[Serendipity1607307077]

Look at your first sentence. You have recognised that you need to accept yourself for who you are.

 

Everyone is different - some people are beautiful, others have incredible intelligence, others are good at painting or poetry.. some people are great teachers... we all have our differences and that's what makes everyone so unique.

 

You need to recognise and accept yourself as a unique person.

I used to think the same way as you did.. and guess what? One day I just said "You know what? I'm sick of being depressed. I'm sick of comparing myself to others." I picked myself up and from then forward, I never cared about what anyone else thought of me. And with that, my confidence also grew.

 

You ask how much time is enough - you will know when it's time for you. These friends of yours probably aren't even really ready for dating yet! Just relax! You will know when it's the right time, and when you realise it, you will be able to go out and test the waters a bit.

 

If you are worried you will never date, go to youth groups, play mixed sports, and get involved with other kids your age!

 

Honey, you have so many years ahead of you - don't worry about what people think of you, don't worry about dating! Focus on you and how you are feeling. And don't be shy - work on building up that confidence.

 

Instead of looking at yourself in the mirror and saying "ugh, pimples!" or "Look at my fat bum! Yuk", say to yourself "hey, I have great boobs" or "I like my eyes"!! See the good qualities in yourself. And like I said - who cares about what other people think - enjoy being young and enjoy being you!

[Meow18]

Serendipity gave great advice.

 

Why compare yourselves to others? Where will that get anyone? Nobody in this world is amazing at everything. We all have flaws and we all have great things about us. Stop looking at your flaws. No one is perfect-not even celebrities or models. You might see a celebrity on tv and think they are so much more beautiful than you, but seriously, that isn't who they are. We never see celebs in their every day lives, only when they are all dressed up with a lot of make up.

 

One day you will meet someone who won't want anyone else. They will love you for your flaws. Life is about taking risks. And yes, you might get rejected, or a guy might think someone else is prettier (we have all been there..), but one guy will come along who will think you are perfect. You just have to learn to love yourself first.

 

When you really accept yourself and have confidence in who you are, you will really see a difference in how others see you.

[Relationship Coach]

I have many thoughts on this but let me say this. You have to accept and love yourself for whom you are regardless of any short comings in which you believe you have. You have the beauty of youth on your side and like it or not, you will change over the coming years, physically and mentally. What is considered to be attractive by ones standards may not be by another's. The saying the "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" is very true. A very attractive quality in a man or a woman is self confidence. No painfully surgeries or needles, no long hours at the gym and no fad diets to follow.

 

Love yourself and speak up, you'd be surprised who might be listening.