Is my friend saying he doesn't want to see me again?

[LootieTootie]

Let me elaborate why I am asking you this question... I'm trying to help you see that their is a bigger issue here than "does my FWB still want to sleep with me every once in a blue moon?"

I don't think you like this guy as just a friend, I think you like him more than that. Why else would you post this?

You tell him you feel "safe" with him and you get emotional with him when you talk about how men have treated you in the past. This isn't you having fun with a FWB. This is you, using him as an emotional blanket for all your insecurities and baggage that you never addressed/healed from.

It's no surprise when you said sometimes you guys go months without seeing each other. I can see why. If he was to see you more, he couldn't have a FWB with no strings attached because he can feel you using him as an emotional blanket. That's when you both started opening up, he made it very clear to you that he's ok with you seeing other men because you deserve to be happy.

Hence, he can't give you that. You have to find that for yourself.

 

[MissCanuck]

Your FWB has been pretty clear. He will see you again if the chance arises. It seems he is not ruling it out but also not making specific plans to see you. If you meet someone else in the meantime, cool. No hard feelings.

What else do you need to know? 

[CherrieTart]

Maybe the guy is just really attracted to me. I really don't know what to think. I said he was touching himself as a way to hide that he was aroused. 

[CherrieTart]

2 hours ago, MissCanuck said:

Your FWB has been pretty clear. He will see you again if the chance arises. It seems he is not ruling it out but also not making specific plans to see you. If you meet someone else in the meantime, cool. No hard feelings.

What else do you need to know? 

I’m not sure why people here are trying to convince me that he’s saying something different than what he told me in person. I asked him flat out if he was saying that he didn’t want to see me again and he said that’s not what he’s saying. 

[Jaunty]

He may not be interested in seeing you anymore,  but is not cutting you off completely.  Either he wants to be kind, or he may prefer to leave the door open in case sometime in the future he would like to access to the "benefits' you've offered. 

[Wiseman2]

1 hour ago, CherrieTart said:

Maybe the guy is just really attracted to me. I really don't know what to think. I said he was touching himself as a way to hide that he was aroused. 

Are you concerned your FWB or men in general aren't attracted to you? 

[CherrieTart]

1 hour ago, Jaunty said:

He may not be interested in seeing you anymore,  but is not cutting you off completely.  Either he wants to be kind, or he may prefer to leave the door open in case sometime in the future he would like to access to the "benefits' you've offered. 

Do you not understand the part where I mentioned that he told me he wasn’t saying that he doesn’t want to see me again? Or is that just being completely ignored…

[Batya33]

8 hours ago, CherrieTart said:

He might not want to be friends with a woman he’s had sex with. Again he never said he didn’t want to be friends with me….

Right. Then he apparently changed his mind. And like I wrote there’s way more of a risk of changing one’s mind when sex is involved. 

[Batya33]

51 minutes ago, CherrieTart said:

Do you not understand the part where I mentioned that he told me he wasn’t saying that he doesn’t want to see me again? Or is that just being completely ignored…

Those are words. Watch the feet - the actions / not the lips. His feet walked away. I’m sorry. 

[Batya33]

3 hours ago, CherrieTart said:

Maybe the guy is just really attracted to me. I really don't know what to think. I said he was touching himself as a way to hide that he was aroused. 

Or maybe he is a person who like many people feel attracted except he chose to react to it in a creepy and inappropriate way. 

[toby17]

Friends with benefits

I don't think there's enough information here.

On one hand, it sounds like he thinks you're relying on him too much... but honestly he also just sounds preachy and supercilious.

Horny

You don't need to ask this question.  You already walked out and fed him an excuse.

He's not interested in a relationship - he'd say anything to get in your pants.

No, you made the right decision the first time. I don't know if it's low self-esteem or you feel bad for him but don't. Flush and move on.