swilliams Posted April 24, 2023 Author Share Posted April 24, 2023 Definitely. It was fun Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 It’s been a few weeks now… coming back to update that I’ve been doing a lot better since my original post and I’ve accepted that we aren’t together…. he on the other hand just got explosive and went off on me because I invited other guys to a party I threw. He went off about how he has feelings for me and it’s complicated and he’s scared 🤨 Link to comment
boltnrun Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 9 minutes ago, swilliams said: It’s been a few weeks now… coming back to update that I’ve been doing a lot better since my original post and I’ve accepted that we aren’t together…. he on the other hand just got explosive and went off on me because I invited other guys to a party I threw. He went off about how he has feelings for me and it’s complicated and he’s scared 🤨 Translation: I haven't gotten laid recently and I'm horny. Will you service me? I want to get off. But just in case you get mad after I manipulate you into having sex with me, I'm letting you know subtly that there still will be no relationship. How come you didn't block him from contacting you? Are you still "hoping"? This guy doesn't want what you want. I strongly recommend you do not give in and have sex with him. The end result would be the same. 3 Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 You didn’t read my comment? Lol I accepted not being with him. It’s part of why he went off on me…. this was when he already got off multiple times….. and no I’m not hoping to be with him. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 29 minutes ago, swilliams said: You didn’t read my comment? Lol I accepted not being with him. It’s part of why he went off on me…. this was when he already got off multiple times….. and no I’m not hoping to be with him. I didn't get from your post that you're still having sex with him. How exactly are you "feeling better"? It seems like you think he "went off" and "got explosive" because he actually does love you and want to be in a committed relationship with you. But he clearly stated that isn't going to happen. Because he's "scared" 🙄 Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 No lol I don’t think it’s because he loves me. Asking, not assuming helps. I was coming back because it’s so funny that I got my head on straight and backing up it’s just funny that i was so wrapped up before! Link to comment
LootieTootie Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 FWB or no FWB, this guy is possessive and that's not a good trait. I would block him. He has issues he need to work thru and you should not be subjecting yourself to his antics. 2 Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 3 hours ago, swilliams said: he on the other hand just got explosive and went off on me because I invited other guys to a party I threw. If you would like to move forward in peace, it would be best to avoid him. He shouldn't even know about your parties or other guys. You'll be able to move forward when you delete and block him and all his people from ALL your social media and messaging apps. Keep in mind possessiveness and controlling behavior is a red flag, not a sign of caring or interest. Free yourself permanently from him and this situation. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 It's not "feelings" he has for you. He just wants to make sure no other guy gets to play with what he considers his. I used to be involved with a guy like that. He only acted possessive and overtly affectionate if he thought another guy was interested in me. He wanted me to be available only to him for when he wanted sex and companionship. It wasn't out of love or "feelings". 1 Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 Why haven't you blocked this guy? There is zero point allowing him any access to you. Link to comment
Jaunty Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 7 hours ago, swilliams said: It’s been a few weeks now… coming back to update that I’ve been doing a lot better since my original post and I’ve accepted that we aren’t together…. he on the other hand just got explosive and went off on me because I invited other guys to a party I threw. He went off about how he has feelings for me and it’s complicated and he’s scared 🤨 Why is your party guest list even on the guy's radar? Obviously you're still involved playing games with him. Stop contacting him, block him from your contacts and social media, and get healthy so you don't waste any more of you youth on this kind of pathetic behavior. 1 Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 We still sleep together . I was just coming back bc I was proud of myself for separating my feelings. he was invited to the party and no I don’t think his issues and controlling problems equal feelings at all😬 Link to comment
Batya33 Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 26 minutes ago, swilliams said: We still sleep together . I was just coming back bc I was proud of myself for separating my feelings. he was invited to the party and no I don’t think his issues and controlling problems equal feelings at all😬 I would stop having intercourse with this person since he is a troublemaker at least and could cause real issues for you and your safety and the safety of those around you including on line safety. Certainly if your goal is to be able to separate your feelings from having intercourse with this person -I mean you do you - we all I suppose take pride in what we view as "accomplishments". To me a more meaningful accomplishment would be to avoid the temptation to have an orgasm with him since the downsides are truly concerning. 2 Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 Yeah I’ve been thinking that, too. Especially after the incident at the party. Yuck. he showed me ugly sides of him! Link to comment
Batya33 Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 3 minutes ago, swilliams said: Yeah I’ve been thinking that, too. Especially after the incident at the party. Yuck. he showed me ugly sides of him! He showed you who he was and what he was about for months now, yes? Time to stop thinking -especially thinking with your um private parts - and act by not having intercourse with him anymore or associating with him anymore. 1 Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 Yeah but before I was honestly blinded by the infatuation 😂 lesson learned Link to comment
Batya33 Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 1 hour ago, swilliams said: Yeah but before I was honestly blinded by the infatuation 😂 lesson learned The lesson is to take accountability. You weren’t blinded. As you wrote here you continued to make choices to let him have intercourse with you. You reacted to your feelings by acting in a way that was unhealthy. You still are since he’s shown himself to be continuously flaky and unstable and yet you let him have intercourse. What kind of baby daddy would he make ? Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 Eww lol I’d never have a baby with him 😂 Link to comment
Batya33 Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 22 minutes ago, swilliams said: Eww lol I’d never have a baby with him 😂 How does he feel about that - and have you discussed how often to get tested for STDs since this is a long-standing sexual arrangement? Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 He doesn’t want them either! Lol and we get tested regularly Link to comment
Batya33 Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 1 minute ago, swilliams said: He doesn’t want them either! Lol and we get tested regularly Great so you’ll just work out the abortion or adoption details. Don’t be surprised if his reaction changes given how volatile he gets. Have fun! Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 4 hours ago, swilliams said: We still sleep together. That's ok. As long as you can handle casual sex and don't want to turn it into a relationship. If he's now "eww" is that nonfriends but benefits?lol 1 1 Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 32 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: That's ok. As long as you can handle casual sex and don't want to turn it into a relationship. If he's now "eww" is that nonfriends but benefits?lol Just like he isn’t dad material haha yikes lol 😂 I can handle it being casual! It took me awhile to though . Link to comment
Jaunty Posted May 10, 2023 Share Posted May 10, 2023 3 hours ago, swilliams said: Yeah but before I was honestly blinded by the infatuation 😂 lesson learned Look, let's get honest here. You can't be obsessed and infatuated with a guy, act out on it all kinds of dramatic ways, then get "advice" on the internet and instantly be over it and able to just bang him with no feelings in the world. Nobody could pull that off. As long as you're still having sex, or, for that matter, even in contact, you are still playing your part in this very sick little game. Can't you move on? If you need to have NSA sex so desperately, I'm sure you can find many willing fellows that you have no obsessions or other baggage with. 1 Link to comment
swilliams Posted May 10, 2023 Author Share Posted May 10, 2023 🤣 I dunno my needs are being met soo.. whatever you wanna believe lol Link to comment
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