Is he cheating with my best friend

[Fififluff]

 I believe there might be something going on with my partner and my best friend.  There have been many incidents were I have been straight up lied to from him and her about him going to her house for one reason or another.  I have made it very clear that I am uncomfortable with there relationship especially cause I was lied to.  He often just stops by at her house and even when I ask if he did he does not tell me.  I did not have a car so he would go pick her up and it always seemed like I had to stay home and it  woukd  take them up to 3 hours to get back when it is a half an hour drive one way.  Whenever they are together things always take longer than needed and they are full of excuses but they often are unreachable by ph.  Sometimesshe would call giving me a play by play of what they were doing just so I would be kept in the loop but it was excessive.  Some of my lingerie has even appear at her house when I know I never lent it to her.  They also knew each other before I knew yeither of them.  She always seems to know my every move even when I did not inform her.  I'm constantly finding out about them doing stuff together.  And they fight with each other talk trash about each other yet they always end up hanging out.  She tells me what a horrible person he is at all times.  He even thinks she stole his ph actually he swears she did yet he hangs out with her still. All of her messages or calls are always erased from his ph.  They both swear nothing is Going on but they both lie all the time. I just want the truth help me find it 

 

 

[Kwothe28]

"Whenever there is any doubt, there is no doubt."- Sam (Ronin (1998))

You dont have to play their game where they go behind your back like that. Remove yourself from the equation. That means to cut both of them from your life. Boyfriend and best friend. Because neither of them is good at their roles.

[Lambert]

Get yourself out of this situation today.

Sorry. It stinks but this is BS and neither of these people are on your side. 

[MissCanuck]

55 minutes ago, Fififluff said:

 I believe there might be something going on with my partner and my best friend.

I think you are right. 

I'm sorry. Leave them to each other, extract yourself from their lives, and find people better to surround yourself with. 

[Rose Mosse]

What is “the truth” to you? How far would you go to uncovering it? Are you thinking of hiring a private investigator? And, why is it necessary to go to those lengths?

You already doubt him. Choose to address that doubt and uncertainty. If you doubt him, it’s already over.

[Wiseman2]

2 hours ago, Fififluff said:

  There have been many incidents were I have been straight up lied to from him and her about him going to her house for one reason or another. 

Sorry this is happening. How long have you been dating? Do you live together? 

How long have you been friends with this woman and why would she seduce/steal your BF?

The best thing to do with a liar is to end it. It's that simple. If there is any question about his integrity including cheating or stealing your underwear to give to her just end it.

[boltnrun]

Why is this posted in the Pets forum?

Lies and distrust are solid reasons for ending a relationship.  

[SooSad33]

No trust.. too many uncertainties.. being lied to?

sooo not good 😕 .

I'd disown the both of them!  Move on and find someone to hang with who is actually real & respectful.

No need for any of this... messed up crap.

 

[Fififluff]

Been with him almost 3 years and was living with him but recently had to leave the home as he is a hoarder and the living space was unlivable for my son and I.  I have been trying to stick by him and get him some help.  The first year was amazing everything I've ever wanted in a partner but things changed when my son came to live with us after spending time with his dad for a year.  I know in my heart it's true I have for a while just needed to hear it from unbiased people as I'm being told I'm crazy.  Thank you I now have what I need to move on

[Rose Mosse]

29 minutes ago, Fififluff said:

Been with him almost 3 years and was living with him but recently had to leave the home as he is a hoarder and the living space was unlivable for my son and I.  I have been trying to stick by him and get him some help.  The first year was amazing everything I've ever wanted in a partner but things changed when my son came to live with us after spending time with his dad for a year.  I know in my heart it's true I have for a while just needed to hear it from unbiased people as I'm being told I'm crazy.  Thank you I now have what I need to move on

You don’t live together. That is a major hurdle you don’t have to worry about. Yes, find the strength to leave this relationship. If not for your sake, for your child who needs a mother not bogged down by a cheating partner with other mental health issues not addressed. I’m referring to the hoarding and inhospitable living conditions.

[Wiseman2]

29 minutes ago, Fififluff said:

recently had to leave the home as he is a hoarder and the living space was unlivable for my son and I. 

Excellent. You need a safe, decent environment for yourself and your child. You can not fix or change hoarders.

Add to this your suspicions of cheating and your friends excess involvement and the answer is clear.

End it with both of them. You don't need questionable friends or questionable BFs.

Focus rather on a nice living space for yourself and your son. Your own friends, family good co-parenting and getting a more expanded social circle.

 Put your child first at all times rather than subjecting him to health hazards in order to hang onto a loser.

[Kwothe28]

2 hours ago, Fififluff said:

as I'm being told I'm crazy.

Gaslighting. The act of manipulating a person by forcing them to question their thoughts, memories, and the events occurring around them. Read a bit about it, its quite common in situations like yours.