SadnConfused Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 Just another opinion about the Kitty. Yeah, he looks a little like a killer. Do you all know domestic cats are considered the largest killers in all of the animal kingdom... They kill (and eat) over 10,000 species of insects and animals. Everything from bettles to birds to shrew. Sorry about the side note. (gradle read my post)... he he Link to comment
Hope75 Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 Sorry Gradle that my cat has taken over your thread! He sends his hellos to your little kitties. Link to comment
SadnConfused Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 No, No. No take over. Just a conversation piece to break the monotony... Link to comment
gradle Posted July 15, 2005 Author Share Posted July 15, 2005 hah, you guys are hilarious, hope, i think your kitty is adorable. i might post mine up here soon! i just got back from the game not too long ago and it was fun...i kind of wish i had taken C though...but i'm realizing that the amount i'm thinking about him is not healthy...it's just going to lead to more pain in a few weeks if i keep thinking so much about him... he's so cute though...he texted me asking me if i drove home drunk last night...(i didn't, but in my mind he was asking me why i didn't stop and say hello after i dropped off his roommate-which may very well not be the case, but hey, it's my fantasy world ) and then i just texted him back: no, but i wish i could have joined you in a back scratch, have fun in vegas, and dont get handcuffed, unless of course you want to! i was tryingto be light and simple and let him know he didn't have to get in touch wiht me while he was away so he doesn't think that i'm upset, or going to get angry with him, or expect anything out of him....ugh, i'm paranoid... but i do like him, which i know is foolish b/c it won't last but a few more weeks...but i just think he makes me happy right now b/c he's the most exciting (good) thing that's happened to me in a while,... that's somewhat immediate, i guess.... but otherwise, i'm up so late b/c i'm worried about resigning tomorrow. i've never actually resigned for a job...i've quit to go to college, for classes, internships, but now i'm just nervous, i feel guilty... but i just wrote out the letter and i have to do it...my boss was asking me to help him out w/ a project just today, and i'm going t o feel so guilty! but whatever, at least my mind hasn't really been focused on J that much today! big step, baby steps... Link to comment
brando Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 HOPE75 wrote Not pathetic, but the most important part is that you love yourself first. You are never going to feel worthy of love until you love yourself. You can't depend on others, even friends, to feel worthy and loved. Gradle, you are lovable, why don't you love yourself? Friends offer support and they do love you, but it's really important that you love yourself first. Hope you nailed it. This is so true and so hard to. This is the crucial part of healing after a realtionship ends. Asking ones self these questions and sticking with it to find the answers. I feel that it is the root cause to why dumpees act the way they do, (myself included), it is here faced wit the end of a relationship that these deeply rooted feelings arise, which has nothing to do with the dumper. I know now that the pain and discomfort i went through during my divorce (height of my divorce) was caused mostly by myself and not my ex. My thoughts, my beliefs of how she should be acting, or what she should be sayng, just a big mind game i played on myself. It takes a tremendous amount of strength and energy to look at myself, and find the character defects which caused this incredible pain. It was easy to point to the ex and avoid the truth. She wasnt around me anymore, and i was blaming her for my own sh_ _! Brando Link to comment
Hope75 Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 Hey Gradle, So today is the big day in terms of giving your resignation aye? How long have you been at this job? I'm sure your boss will understand. When I left my job at the vet hospital to go to nursing school, my boss was sad to see me go, but mostly supportive. (although he was kind of a pain in the a** when it came down to the wire... ) How many more weeks will you be working, just two? This is quite exciting! Try to relax on the C thing too... I'm noticing a little bit of a pattern with you getting too needy with these guys, though C could just be because you are trying so hard to get over J. Either way, I think it's good that you are starting over fresh in a new city very soon, and will have time to face yourself and do some real healing. It's going to be a good move for you. How've you been feeling towards J lately? Link to comment
DyingInsideOut Posted July 15, 2005 Share Posted July 15, 2005 Hi Gradle, It's been a while since I've been on. Things have been very busy with the move. I wanted to check in with you and see how you are. I haven't had a chance yet, to read all the posts and catch up, but I will once I get home this evening. I hope you are well. Link to comment
gradle Posted July 15, 2005 Author Share Posted July 15, 2005 hi brando, hope, dying.. happy friday! dying i hope your move went well....guess waht, i'll be in the dc area in about a month! i turned in my resignation today, and my boss just seemed really sad. but pretty understanding, which was a relief. i've only been there about a year, and htey've put so much time training me, etc...and i felt worse for the project managers...so much to do, and i won't be able to finish before i leave...so i'm feeling a little guilty, a little disappointed in myself, but somewhat relieved.... yes, hope, you are right about hte pattern, and you are all right too, about me having to love myself first... i'm just going to try and drag through the next few weeks adn enjoy my time here.... and i've had a fling once before, a summer fling right after j and i first ended it (about 5 years ago) and my fling and i got to be really good friends afterwards, so i'm hoping this is hwat happens again...get a really good friend...and have some fun while i'm at it, and make it through the next few weeks without being killed by loneliness but you are right...bad pattern on my part. but he's sooo damn cute, it's hard to keep my hands off of him yes, there is a good chance c is just here b/c i'm trying to move on...but i think he's a sweetheart, and i found out he used to like me in college, and i thought that was great! it feels like i have an old friend here, you know? but c doesn't seem to mind too much... anyways, he'll be busy after he gets back from vegas, i guess his bro is moving next week, so it's supposed to be "brothers week"...isn't that great? a guy who really loves his family and spends time with them... i hope i find a sweet guy like this again some day...i will, i know i will... but it's nice to be reminded that they are out there right now... Link to comment
DyingInsideOut Posted July 16, 2005 Share Posted July 16, 2005 Gradle, I am so glad to hear that things seem to be going so well for you. You are even able to put smiley faces up!!!!!! It's very encouraging. I haven't left the DC area yet, but I'll be gone in about a week and a half, but believe me, I'll still be hanging around enotalone. I need you guys. More than you know. Keep up the good work! I'm glad to see that you are doing soooooo well!!!!!!! Dying . . . . . . Link to comment
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