How important is height?

[Jibralta]

However, what's more important to me than height is body type. I've dated a shorter guy in my past, but he was pretty built, and made me feel petite next to him (if that makes sense).

 

That's true for me, too.

[Honeycomb8]

Lol flip side to that----I'm intimidated by men that are over 6', and I'm 5'7". Love my heels but even so, will not date a man over that height because I don't feel safe, like they can overpower me too easily. But I've been abused so that might make a difference . Even last summer this guy 6'5" cornered me I felt so afraid. For that, I'd pick a shorter guy over too tall.

 

My neighbor is near 6', her hubby stands at about 5'8". Not short for a man, she's tall for a woman. Oddly, they don't look off to me, but maybe because I like them both so much that I tend to not really notice it anymore.

 

I'm 5'7 too, and imo I've really found the perfect height for me is 6' or 6'1 (and surprisingly, every guy I've dated in the last 5 years have been that height or taller). When they're 6 or 6'1, when we're walking side by side I find that they can put their arms around my shoulder easily, since it's at perfect height and my arm doesn't get sore having it around their waist. Anything shorter and it just doesn't feel as comfortable.

 

Anything taller and I too think they're too tall lol don't really want to feel like a kid next to them.

[j.man]

How much it matters depends how short you are. I'm 5'7" and at what I'd consider to be the point that's considered by many women to be "short, but not too short." You can look at it as height on its own being a general drawback, but it's more that you can't get away with a whole lot. You see the attitude pretty prevalent in this thread alone. "I'm seen short gymnists who found women." "I've seen good looking short guys who found women." "I like taller guys, but a built shorter guy worked for me." None of these are call-outs as I've got my own arbitrary preferences and there are plenty of things attributes I'd need offset by something else to be attracted to someone. Another example would be putting a short guy with a bit of a gut next to a tall guy with one and that largely being the difference between "portly fellow" and "dad bod." Again, speaking to a broader marketability and not making any claim of "you're screwed," you'll be expected to put more effort into your physical conditioning and overall appearance.

 

I do have empathy for guys who are particularly short, but there's not much you can do about your height. As far as dating goes, it's a disadvantage, so you've got no choice but to play to your advantages or do your best to create some. And it's not exactly the case that tall guys are just coasting it on Vag Island simply for being tall, so try not to be spiteful or get stuck comparing your struggle to others. All you can do is do you. Being confident, having a job, exercising good hygiene, acquiring social skills, and being physically fit will pretty much ensure you'll have options.

[HealingLight]

I'm 5'3"ish and was crazy about a scrawny guy who was 5'6" for many years. My mom used to have a running joke that I preferred men who I could take in a fight. One of my sisters is married to a man around 5'3". My current boyfriend is around 6'1" and extremely built with a six pack, yaddah yaddah--his body diverged so much from the kinds of guys I would typically go for that it took me a little bit to get used to this! For me, I'm more of a face person and I love kind, intellectual men. So as long as a guy has a good personality and a soft face, I really wouldn't give two s about his height.

[Batya33]

I'm 5'3"ish and was crazy about a scrawny guy who was 5'6" for many years. My mom used to have a running joke that I preferred men who I could take in a fight. One of my sisters is married to a man around 5'3". My current boyfriend is around 6'1" and extremely built with a six pack, yaddah yaddah--his body diverged so much from the kinds of guys I would typically go for that it took me a little bit to get used to this! For me, I'm more of a face person and I love kind, intellectual men. So as long as a guy has a good personality and a soft face, I really wouldn't give two s about his height.

 

I love how a 5"6 guy is described as "scrawny" as if he is an animal -if a woman was described in analogous terms that would be "superficial" and offensive even. I guess 6-pack guy isn't "intellectual" from how she described it lol.

[Madoka]

Hmm, i am around 5"9, i don't consider my self to be small or tall. I either stand equal to most girls around me or slightly on the small or taller side, but we are talking nothing noticeable. I admit i like girls of equal height or slightly smaller, i wouldn't not date a tall one though, i see height as a minor thing really. My ex was quite a small person though, she said she preferred any girl with a bit of height on her, true it wasn't much coming from her to say it but most girls aren't fussed either way, one of my friends is dating a guy who is tiny, doesn't bother her, she says it makes him quite in a way.

Honestly if you are tiny, it wont hinder your odds, but i will say it could but a tiny disadvantage against you.

[thealchemist]

I'm 5'9 and have always had a bit of a thing for woman right at my height or taller. I don't know why but preference is preference.

 

My wife is 5'6-5'7 and is the shortest girl I think I have ever been attracted too.

 

For me I just feel that I might break a small woman and prefer some height for whatever reason, not that height actually implies anything like that.

 

I also don't want a woman I am with to have to adjust her attire and shoes based on my height. I have no problem being with a woman who is taller than me wearing heels. I also think it isn't weird because I put of no vibes about it and it honestly doesn't bother me at all.

 

I have a friend who is the EXACT same height as me (5'8.75") and everyone always thinks I'm taller.

 

But I will also so that many people think I am a bit taller than I am. I've been told it is my personality and mannerisms.

 

So it (height) can be perceived drastically differently depending on variables other than height.

 

Also, the change in your posture depending on you confidence or comfort in your own skin can make a bit of difference in your perceived height.

 

I am also pretty well built and I think that also helps.

[HealingLight]

I love how a 5"6 guy is described as "scrawny" as if he is an animal -if a woman was described in analogous terms that would be "superficial" and offensive even. I guess 6-pack guy isn't "intellectual" from how she described it lol.

 

I don't relate the term scrawny to animals, so that wasn't my intention. What I meant is that this 5'6" guy has thinner arms and legs than me. Not a lick of muscle on him. So he wasn't this short guy that somehow "made up" for it by being built like a lot of the previous posts mentioned (that's the whole reason I used this descriptor)--I found him attractive and loved his personality, so all these conceptions around the "ideal" height/build just didn't matter. I'm sure there are other women who think similarly. And no, a guy can take excellent care of his body or be very muscular and be intelligent at the same time; the two aren't mutually exclusive. What informs my attraction more than a man's build/height is his intellect and facial features. Whether that's in a boyish body or a very built body just doesn't make much of a difference to me. My whole point is that the original poster isn't facing a hopeless plight--his height is only as big of an obstacle as he chooses to make it because there are women who are attracted to short men of various builds.

 

That being said, I know there are women where height and build does matter--I had a roommate who would not date a man under 6 feet and who didn't look like he "could carry her through the woods for 5 miles if [she] broke [her] leg." But, those women aren't for him. So the best I could recommend is to focus on cultivating the qualities that are under his control that he'd like in a mate while learning to accept what he can't change about himself.

[Batya33]

I don't relate the term scrawny to animals, so that wasn't my intention. What I meant is that this 5'6" guy has thinner arms and legs than me. Not a lick of muscle on him. So he wasn't this short guy that somehow "made up" for it by being built like a lot of the previous posts mentioned (that's the whole reason I used this descriptor)--I found him attractive and loved his personality, so all these conceptions around the "ideal" height/build just didn't matter. I'm sure there are other women who think similarly. And no, a guy can take excellent care of his body or be very muscular and be intelligent at the same time; the two aren't mutually exclusive. What informs my attraction more than a man's build/height is his intellect and facial features. Whether that's in a boyish body or a very built body just doesn't make much of a difference to me. My whole point is that the original poster isn't facing a hopeless plight--his height is only as big of an obstacle as he chooses to make it because there are women who are attracted to short men of various builds.

 

That being said, I know there are women where height and build does matter--I had a roommate who would not date a man under 6 feet and who didn't look like he "could carry her through the woods for 5 miles if [she] broke [her] leg." But, those women aren't for him. So the best I could recommend is to focus on cultivating the qualities that are under his control that he'd like in a mate while learning to accept what he can't change about himself.

 

Yes, I understand and disagree that shorter men have to "make up" for being short. I know that's an unpopular opinion and all but I don't think men who are shorter than average should consider it a negative if they're looking for a long term relationship. It might affect success for flings/random hookups and might make meeting through online sites harder.

[Jibralta]

That being said, I know there are women where height and build does matter

 

Build does matter to me. Not so much height. (Just sayin)