depressed as ever

[Shania1234]

currently pregnant. he doesn't give a ... seems like he's got no interest and I'm SEVERELY depressed!!!!!!! I think this is more of a me issue than anything. I've changed my relationship and now pregnant for this man and he doesnt care whether I get blood tests done or go to appointments because I'm so severely f-d up I just want to be in bed all day moping and feeling sorry for myself!!! I'm considering abortion because I can't deal with myself much less a child. he's always playing video games and locked up in his room we have a two bedroom apt. he's so distant and I'm just lonely and I can't see anything really worth being happy about in my life. I think i need some serious help i can't help how i feel!!!! it's literally taking over my life. I got some antidepressants a while back that I never took because I promised myself I would never take something like that knowing the history of depression in my family. but now I feel like i need to and I can't because I'm pregnant. overall I feel like my life has gone to the s. I use to be employed fulltime with benefits ended up with back problems and now I can't work full-time without experiencing pain in my muscles and back. why is this happening to me...

[boltnrun]

Please contact a family member and tell them how you are feeling.

[Shania1234]

I don't want to do an abortion but then also I do love kids. I just can't handle the situation with my partners lack of support and help. he seems to only care for himself. I think a lot of these negative feelings stem from being with him because he's a major put down in my life. I love him but at some point I have love myself more than him and currently I don't because I put up with his crap. my mom has told me to get an abortion.... that's the only way she will allow me back home. I don't want to go through that...

[arjumand]

i don't understand why you didn't take the anti-depressants, especially when there is a history of depression in your family -- that should make it more likely that you are looking for solutions.

 

You need to get some help -- like therapeutic help -- to make a decision about what to do with your pregnancy. Clearly, talking to your partner is a complete waste of time. Please go to a professional as soon as possible to discuss all of your issues.

[DanZee]

Your boyfriend has totally shut down. He can't cope with you being pregnant. You're having trouble because your hormones are going crazy and without support from your boyfriend, you've become extremely depressed. Your financial situation is bad. I don't think either of you are ready to have a child.

 

I hate abortion, but I think you should consider it and also breaking up with your boyfriend who obviously doesn't care about you. And then you need to rebuild your life.

[Wiseman2]

Who is the the father?

When i was 23 my family pressure me into marrying a guy 3 years younger than me from back home. During that time I was already seeing someone I knew my family would never accept because he's muslim. The man i married isn't much of a man because he can't get a license he can't read write nor do anything. All problems I never foresaw at age 23 getting married so young my family knows I'm unhappy yet my mom keeps asking when I'm habing children and what I'm waiting for.. I am genuinely unhappy and I can't be with someone who I'm not intimate with for 3 years since hes been here.

[Shania1234]

The father is the guy who already has two children.

[Shania1234]

Because I wanted to be different I always told myself that no matter what I would never let myself get so low. I'm stupid for thinking that he has a positive impact on me. His impact is always negative. I love him so much but I need to be supported... emotionally. And he knows this but doesn't offer help or care instead he ignores me.

[Shania1234]

I don't know what to think. He told me to keep the baby but he's not very enthusiastic and he is kind of neutral. As in he doesn't care If I chose to abort. The other day he told me that life with kids is difficult and If we don't have kids we could do whatever we want. He doesn't pay child support for the two kids he has and neither does he really spend time with them.

[Wiseman2]

Are you still in the arranged marriage? This other man sounds like a loser.

He doesn't pay child support for the two kids he has and neither does he really spend time with them.

[Shania1234]

I am still legally married.. I didn't get divorced yet...

my x and I still talk sometimes but living with him is a different story. I agree he is. he has a good paying job with benefits he's smart but he's an . I guess I'm attracted to a certain type it just sucks because I wish he were more like my x husband in terms of kindness and caring ways. reality is he isn't and I feel completely alone in all of this and I can't handle it. it's basically like someone giving u the silent treatment everyday. they come home avoid u like the plague and check in on u 2 3 minutes here and there and then disappear again. it's sickening and it's very dreading I feel like in any healthy relationship there should be convo and I shouldn't have to suffer through my depression alone when i have a partner. he offers no support other than " get over it" or get up and do something. if he weren't so mean and ignorant and maybe more loving and caring and gave me that empowerment and talked through things I would feel a whole lot more at ease being in this relationship. I need to admit to myself that this relationship is a major set back.

[Wiseman2]

Do you live with your husband, your family or the father of this pregnancy?

I am still legally married. I wish he were more like my husband in terms of kindness and caring ways.

[Shania1234]

I live with the guy im pregnant for . .. but it's stressful. I am always feeling down and he always leaves me by myself and is in his room playing video games with his friends. not the kind of relationship I want with someone. I need attention too... I need someone to talk to and someome who will understand me and help me thru this...

I think I've decided to get an abortion and leave him. I love him but we are very different and he's very distant and cold. I need healthy relationship ...i feel like I'm being weighed down.

I am tired of picking up his clothed off the washroom floor the kitchen floor the living room and room floors. tired of him leaving dishes EVERYWHERE and not washing anything unless I decided I don't want to wash anything because I'm fed up. I've talked to him many times to put the leftovers in the trash and put the plate in the sink. I'm EXHAUSTED. he also doesn't seprrate compost from garbage. I've asked him many times not to mix it I got tired of having to dig thru the garbage and separate it. he also drinks every single day.. he drives like a maniac constantly tailgates and swerving in and out of lanes. we have had many fights where I told him I no longer want him stepping foot in my vehicle so I hide my keys. I am tired of cleaning the washroom and then the next day he decides he wants to shave and leave hair everywhere!!!! and doesn't clean up after himself. everytime he eats he leaves a mess on the bed or spills things and doesn't care he's very filthy. if i sweep and mop the very next day or same day he decides to walk into the house with shoes on and give me more work to do. we have fought over smoking in the house. I have asthma and he doesnt care. until I complained to the owners we are renting from about the smoking and they had a talk with him and he's stopped since. I just think that I don't care for this anymore or for him. I just want to be at peace and I feel alone all the time. this relationship serves me no purpose anymore... it never use to be like this. now that this has been going on for 2 years I've decided that I want out.

[Wiseman2]

Ask your family for help.

I think I've decided to get an abortion and leave him.