Sacramento Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 I dated this girl for very short amount of time. She really liked me. Her parents wanted her to get married, for which I wasn't ready at the moment so I gave her timeline of 2 years. Her family didn't like the idea and started looking outside for her. About a month ago I got message from her that she's possible going to get married w someone soon. I congratulated her. During our conversation I said I was thinking to visit her sometime soon(she lives in a different state), she said I've impacted her life in a great way and I'm always welcome to visit her. Things escalated and I said as long as her husband doesn't know. She asked me if I meant to have extra marital affair, for which I replied I don't know, maybe. And then during our conversation we started sexting. After a few days she texts me asking me if there's anything she can do to change my mind, because she really wants to get married with me and that she doesn't find charm in getting married to that person and that she feels forced by her parents. I visited her a few weeks later. And really started to think whether i should move forward and ask her out for marriage. I like this girl but I'm really confused, if she's so willing to cheat with me, on her future husband. How can I trust her that she won't cheat on me after she gets married to me? Was it all because she really liked me or does this sound like an alarm and i should avoid her? My decision would have been to avoid her at all costs, but when i see how much she likes me I feel like I should give her a chance. But i don't want to ruin my life by getting married to someone who can so easily be pursued to cheat. What should I do? Link to comment
Danish Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Marriage should be something your heart aches to do. It's a life long decision. I wouldn't advise you to marry anyone out of pressure. When you're ready no one will have to convince you, beg you or manipulate you out of sympathy. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Love how you are so quick to judge, when you were considering an affair. Classy. Why not stay away from one another, and reevaluate your value system. Link to comment
Usa1ah Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Love how you are so quick to judge, when you were considering an affair. Classy. Why not stay away from one another, and reevaluate your value system. This is it. So true Hollyj. Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 You two should not get married, no. I think you already know the reasons this wouldn't end well. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 Step away from this. She comes from a culture of arranged marriages and you are playing with fire. Her parents wanted her to get married and started looking outside for her. she doesn't find charm in getting married to that person and that she feels forced by her parents. Link to comment
Lester Posted March 12, 2018 Share Posted March 12, 2018 This has the makings of a forced marriage. (i.e., "very short amount of time", deadlines, interference, infidelity, distance etc.) Link to comment
catfeeder Posted March 13, 2018 Share Posted March 13, 2018 But i don't want to ruin my life by getting married to someone who can so easily be pursued to cheat. What should I do? Why is marriage even on the table with someone you hardly know? Link to comment
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