AJBlue17 Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. We ve recently just both got instagram back and started following eachother again. We both deleted our accounts over a year ago because he was being seedy on their with skanky photos, but he said he d deleted it and instead just blocked me, which I found out 3 days later, I was so upset that he lied. He s now angry at me for asking him calmly and nicely to please unfollow certain girls on there (I ve never heard of them) because he s liking every single photo with boobs and ass in it and it makes me feel uncomfortable...especially after the trust issue I had over a year ago with the lie. I think it s pretty reasonable to ask him to do this but now he s ignoring me because he s angry...I really don t think it s a huge ask.? Any thoughts? Thanks in advance! Link to comment
boltnrun Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 I don't think it's unreasonable to ask for just about anything you want in a relationship. However, the other person isn't obligated to say yes even if you think you're right. Is he actually communicating with these "skanky" girls? Asking to meet? Cheating on you with them? Or is it that you just don't like him "liking" their photos? The question is...if he says no, he will not delete "skanky" girls off his Instagram, what will you do next? Link to comment
AJBlue17 Posted March 5, 2018 Author Share Posted March 5, 2018 I'm not sure if he is communicating with them. Before he accepted my request on there his follow count went down significantly lol..he deleted people before accepting me - within a 15 minute time gap. This really made me feel so upset and he can't seem to see why this is an issue for me, he just says he feels 'confined'. The truth is this has put me in tears this morning and it really upsets me. I don't want to tell him what to do but I do want that level of respect from him. He does not care at all how it makes me feel. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 So why stay with someone who doesn't respect you and doesn't care about your feelings? I get that you "love him", but don't you want the person you're in a relationship with to respect you and care about your feelings? Bottom line, you are the one in control here...if him following "skanky" girls on Instagram is something that upsets you, and he won't stop, then you have the option of leaving the relationship. You aren't required to stay. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 Anytime you feel the need to put someone on a leash, they're already past their prime. Your call... Link to comment
AJBlue17 Posted March 5, 2018 Author Share Posted March 5, 2018 I don't know what this means? Can you please explain Link to comment
Hollyj Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 He does not respect you. Why do you put up with it? You shouldn't have to tell him to delete these women. He should know better. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 I don't know what this means? Can you please explain When you have to control someone's behavior, the relationship is over. Link to comment
thorough Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 He blocked you and lied about it, hmmm def deal breaker right there, means he is obviously doing something shady... Link to comment
j.man Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 He blocked you and lied about it, hmmm def deal breaker right there, means he is obviously doing something shady...Yeah. He's looking at these women's photos on instagram. If I were seeing someone and they were the type to follow a bunch of dudes on Instagram, leaving a bunch of "100s" and OK hand emojis on pictures, could I avoid judging the hell of them? Probably not. I understand that, to some extent, it's essentially replaced magazines, but it still gets a little too goofy for me. Regardless, it would then be on me to take or leave, not on them to change. Once you try to police someone's behavior, you can expect one of two things: lies or resentment. Link to comment
Liraele Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 Anytime you feel the need to put someone on a leash, they're already past their prime. Your call... I agree with this. If you have to police their social media and interactions with the opposite sex... there's already an underlying issue. Why would you want to be with someone you're worrying about constantly? You shouldn't. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted March 5, 2018 Share Posted March 5, 2018 Unfortunately what you see is what you get. You can't dictate to people what to do with social media. You can only take note on this and their honesty and integrity in general. He sounds quite immature, how old is he? Sadly he sounds like a real jerk. he s liking every single photo with boobs and ass in it and it makes me feel uncomfortable...especially after the trust issue I had over a year ago with the lie. Link to comment
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