Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 So I went in a first date Saturday and it went very well. The conversation went well and there was lots of flirting, kissing and flirting. So I waited until Sunday evening to text her and she gave me trouble about why it took so long for me to get back to her, she wanted commitment etc. anyway, I apologized and confirmed that I was actually intrested. Since then the texting has been sketchy and we had scheduled a date tonight but she hasn't replied since yesterday (I sent a text yesterday evening and one this morning about the date. Any idea what's going on? Am I being ghosted? Should I text again about the date? Link to comment
j.man Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 So I waited until Sunday evening to text her and she gave me trouble about why it took so long for me to get back to her, she wanted commitment etc. I've said it before and I'll say it again. It's not necessarily that women are more crazy than men, but that they've often got the decency to put it on display sooner than later. You went a single first date with her and she comes back at you for taking so long to get back to her... the day after the date. Using it as a vehicle to go on about wanting commitment or whatever. There are a ton of ladies out there who would be ecstatic if they heard back the next day. Go for those. Dating's supposed to be fun. Also, as a general tip, lay off the texting, particularly early on. It's not a good barometer for interest. Feel free to confirm the date if the previous texts haven't been an effort to do so, but I'd encourage you to cancel it and block. Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 I apologized and confirmed that I was actually intrested. Obviously she doesn't believe you. I would personally be offended and confront her at this point because she's calling you a liar. You texted her the next day/night. Nothing unreasonable about that. She's jumping to incorrect conclusions about the way you feel. Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 Also, as a general tip, lay off the texting, particularly early on. It's not a good barometer for interest. I see this meme on here every once in a while about avoiding texting and it makes no sense. I've attracted plenty of girls through various forms of messaging before meeting. Sometimes these conversations go on for a bit. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 So I went in a first date Saturday and it went very well. The conversation went well and there was lots of flirting, kissing and flirting. So I waited until Sunday evening to text her and she gave me trouble about why it took so long for me to get back to her, she wanted commitment etc. anyway, I apologized and confirmed that I was actually intrested. Since then the texting has been sketchy and we had scheduled a date tonight but she hasn't replied since yesterday (I sent a text yesterday evening and one this morning about the date. Any idea what's going on? Am I being ghosted? Should I text again about the date? The stuff in bold....you don't see the 5 star psycho behavior???? You don't apologize, you run when you see that. I actually hope that she ghosted you. Talk about dodging a bullet.....yikes..... Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 Also.. I was at my families camp all day Sunday and validly had no signal. It's just odd that she faults me for a lack of texting and then stops texting herself. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 Also.. I was at my families camp all day Sunday and validly had no signal. It's just odd that she faults me for a lack of texting and then stops texting herself. .....dude......you didn't do anything wrong. Actually was very nice and super prompt bordering on eager for you to contact her the next day. Like seriously prompt. She.is.psycho. Link to comment
Cope Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 I really hope she will not text you again! Loco! Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 Well.. i sent one last text. I guess if I don't hear back I'll just move on. She was really pretty and we got along very well so I'm a tad disappointed even though you are all very correct Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 What was the text just out of curiosity? Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 I just asked if I was going to be eating dinner alone tonight Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 For your own personal development, I would recommend one more message calling her out on her insulting behavior. You can't have sustainable relationships until you possess this skill. Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 coukd be.. part of me feels stupid for over investing on someone I went on one date with. Although if she didn't want to continue she could have just said so. Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 It doesn't sound like you over invested. It sounds like you need to interpret what she's doing more correctly and build up your spine so you can stick up for yourself. You should stop concentrating on what she should be doing and concentrate instead on what you should be doing. Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 What, exactly, do you suggest I do? And what do you think she's doing (aside from the obvious)? Do you think she has some goal here? Link to comment
DancingFool Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 What, exactly, do you suggest I do? And what do you think she's doing (aside from the obvious)? Do you think she has some goal here? Don't know about careerchoice, but what I would suggest you do is recognize that even if she is a 10 hot, she is also a 10 psycho and you drop her like a hot rock because you know that dealing with a 10 psycho is simply bad for you and not worth no matter how much your lower half may be arguing to the contrary. Your brain rules, yes? That text was pretty desperate and pitiful btw......sooo even IF she responds, you find your nuts and tell her that sorry, you've changed your mind it's not going to work out....and so you recover your self esteem. Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 Well.. to be completely honest... She's hot but I knew she wasn't long term material in about 30 seconds. I'm kinda trying to do some light dating and rebound from a painful breakup. Link to comment
Cope Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 Well.. to be completely honest... She's hot but I knew she wasn't long term material in about 30 seconds. I'm kinda trying to do some light dating and rebound from a painful breakup. She doesn't seem like light dating material either. Most likely gonna give you more trouble than pleasure. That said, never say 'aside from the obvious', trust your gut feeling, it's correct most of the time. I know it's hard, but wait it out. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 Well.. to be completely honest... She's hot but I knew she wasn't long term material in about 30 seconds. I'm kinda trying to do some light dating and rebound from a painful breakup. Except that messing about with a 5 star psycho is about as fun as trying to surf a 50 ft tidal wave - it comes in fast, causes a lot of destruction and leaves a mess behind that will take ages to clean and rebuild. Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 I'm just going to do nothing further and call this one. I should have struck quicker as she seemed very willing at the time but I didn't want to push too hard and I thought there would be another chance. Link to comment
Careerchoice Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 For your own personal development, I would recommend one more message calling her out on her insulting behavior. For example, but put this in your own words: "You know I apologized for not texting you sooner on Sunday, but I take it back since I did nothing wrong. I messaged you the next day which shows I'm interested, which I am, but you don't believe me. I find that extremely insulting since you have no right to call me a liar." You don't have to send this all at once either. Just for educational purposes of the type of conversation you need to have. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 I wouldn't jump through hoops for someone who had the audacity to make those type of comments, especially after a first meet. Link to comment
Tomthumb88 Posted July 5, 2017 Author Share Posted July 5, 2017 I see your point but I'm not doing anything at all unless she responds... Link to comment
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