Iekika Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 I am quite a suspicious person.. not completely trusting after previous bad relationships, so I always look in depth or 'investigate' to see what people are truly like. I met a guy last March. I wasn't instantly attracted but he was a nice guy, and we could chat with ease. We continued to meet up, and the attraction started to grow. Our relationship became a 'dating/sexual' relationship after a few weeks. I was on contraception but had recently changed medication. Obviously it wasn't exclusive, so there were a couple of others for the next few months too. However, this guy was the one I spent the most time with. Dates ranged from a coffee date, a dinner date, walks on the beach, sometimes we just 'hooked up'. I got a shock in June when I discovered I was pregnant. My medication had conflicted with my contraception. I calculated that it was between this guy, and one other, and let them both know about the pregnancy assuming they would put two and two together. This guy however, laughed it off, and said 'it's a good job I had a vasectomy then' which I had never heard of until this news broke. Now.. assuming that this is true, you'd have thought that this guy would have took a step back but he said he was still 'going to be there' because 'you're a really nice girl'. Obviously 'dates' haven't been as romantic in nature as they once were but we still continued to stay in contact regularly since, we text almost everyday and he's been checking in on me and making sure the baby is okay. We have still had a couple of lunch/dinner dates and coffee dates, however no sexual contact since this arose (although he has sent some sexts and flirted quite a bit!). The last couple of months, he's turned increasingly more to talking about other 'dates' and girls that he 'likes' to me. He would tell me about a girl that he has met up with only a few weeks ago, and how well it's went and how he really likes her. The most recent one who he claims to have known for just a month or so has even apparently met his kid (he's separated from his wife and has limited visitation). Upon him saying this to me, I knew there was a likelihood this wasn't true. You don't gain supervised visitation just a couple of months ago and then the mother be okay with a child meeting a girlfriend of a few weeks. As much as he says he likes her, he jokes that he will probably to a runner and be on to 'the next one' soon. This is the third time in a couple of months that he has dated someone 'serious' and that it may become a relationship which I find strange for someone in their 30s to be in so many spontaneous relationships. I set up a dating profile to have a nosy, he is still on it and logs on frequently despite having this 'new girlfriend'. He also seems to text me quite a bit for having a 'girlfriend'. He doesn't mention her often to me, and our texts are just normal friendly chatter for the most part (bar a few flirty ones once in a while). To me, I don't believe that he has had all of these serious dates.. but why would he be lying about it? He has spent whole days with me, I've been invited round for coffee to his house, went out for lunch/dinner, even went on a day trip with him at the beginning of the month, although nothing sexual had obviously happened. Is he keeping me at arms length because he likes me and he's trying to gauge a reaction? Has the dynamic now changed where we are now 'friends' and he just feels comfortable talking to me about this? Did he lie about these relationships, and also this 'vasectomy' and is only keeping me in his life because of this 'baby'? (as I assume most men would run a mile!) Sooooooo confused! Link to comment
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