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Zippy2000

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  1. In the finance industry this is called a SCAM. They get as much information from you and use you and then disappear. This is no different than in love but its emotional. They play on your emotions get what they want and then leave. if your female its best to hold out on men like these. they tell you what YOU want to hear from the beginning. Some are great emotional con artists and do this to get sex. When they do a large proportion then tell you it doesn't feel right or they`re not ready to commit. You don't need people like this. A person will be consistent through time. Its maybe in your best interest to say its all happened in a matter of weeks than months or years. A lot of people use this as a rollercoaster ride. To suck you in and pull away leaving you to wonder what went wrong and as it its you that's the issue. its not. Its him. You need to pull away and look after yourself. Keep busy and find someone that deserves you and make a future together. I d say lessen the contact with him and let him go. If he`s interest he`ll come back. If not then you`ll know its not meant to be. Remember this is around 2 weeks. THINK what it will be like in 2 years. Do you want problems like this so early on? Think about that for a sec.
  2. Your goal is 100 dates!? Hang on a moment here. Dating isn't a target. It isn't even a statistic. Why aim for 100? To compare the previous date to the last date? Who says by the time you read date 89. You actually found out date 22 was ok and your going to go for him. Only to find out he`s been taken because your aim was 100! Oh, can you remember date 60 and what about date 06. So stop with having goals and reading up what to do and the so called dating coaches because most circumstances don't apply because every dating situation is different. I`d say relax and if you enjoy some ones company. There`s no reason why you cant focus on that than worrying about targets and goals. Theres also the risk of the more people you meet there`s a real risk of meeting ted Bundy or Gary Ridgeway. Stay safe.
  3. No, ignoring someone wont work. It wont work unless they have feeling for you. Someone people may be curious and wonder where you went and look you up but other that that. Most people Ive ignores have either left things and never came back or if they did come back it was just to see if you were still alive. One they found out you are alive and you reply. They think less of you because you hadn't been in contact. it works both ways.
  4. Now hold on a moment, Wiseman. Before you start at hinting at "emotional abuse". We don't know the full facts yet. This man reminds me of me when I was younger. I just was very shy and I couldn't hug or kiss in public and this by all means was not abuse as you call it. My girlfriend however was more open and she decided to sit me down and have a talk with me. Things changed for the better because I opened up and knew what she wanted. It all stemmed from what other people though of me but I then learned why should I worry because most people don't mind some form of display of affection. Wiseman is WRONG if you stop affection or conversation. You need CONVERSATION with him first to find out why hes like this. Has he got fear of public displays of affection? Were his parents loving and showed displays of affection? Has he fallen out of love with you? He wont know how unhappy you are if you don't talk or converse with him first. If he wont change then consider if he is the right person for you.
  5. Also wanted "photos" of your flat!? Ive NEVER had anyone ask me to take a photo of my place! What does he want? To know what place you live? Does he want inside pics of your flat to find out whats worth stealing? I find this guy very odd.
  6. Youre not the only one it happens to and like what Jibralta said. Theres not a lot to go on. Firstly people get all excited meeting someone new. After a few message or after maybe a week or two and if they don't feel it. Messages die down and people fade. Ghosting tends to refer to people who disappear from your life but you can still seem them or traces of them online. I wouldn't worry about it as if someone was into theyd still be messaging or trying to get to know you.
  7. Ive had several female friends when a guy have used that line before. I the guys I knew and I had to tell them to stop playing with people. usingt he line NOT READY makes them think they have a chance. Ive had this line used on me with a slight variation "I'm not ready for a relation just now. Got some health issues". they other one was "I'm not ready for anything right now as my youngest is teething and I'm going through a divorce" ONLY to find this person still on the dating site we met BUT what was worse she ended up dating one of my friends from the SAME dating site. Oh, how my friend and I laughed at that one. So when anyone says NOT READY then tell them to stop wasting peoples time and get off a dating site. What I do now is whenever some says "I'm not ready for a relationship" I retort: I'm not waiting around for you. Come back when you are! **If they don't come back. Then you aren't the one**
  8. Usually when someone says "not ready for a relationship". They usually mean they are not ready for a relationship with YOU! Ive heard this before with my friends and in my own experiences. I bet you he`s still on the dating APP. People want to use this line to soften the blow of rejection. He knew what he was getting into and went onto an APP to look for a relationship. Point is. Try not to sleep with someone on the very first date. Not just for your own dignity but for your own safety. His comments will be "bull" if you still see him online.
  9. Mt friend "J" has got stood up 3 times. Shes also had one guy who`s been messaging her for up to 9 months before she let go after all the excuses he made to now looking back as avoiding meeting up. My other friend "L" had two 1 year long relationships that ended and she is now again single and looking. With OLD people have multiple choices and as humans we always thing the grass is greener on the other side. That's why you see the same faces on OLD over. Its good advice to take things at a moderate speed. Trust your gut instinct
  10. Usually when a girl says shes not ready for anything right now. That means to say she is not ready for a relations with YOU. Trust me with the girls have said that is because they don't want to hurt your feelings. You have to move on and date other people.
  11. I'm in the UK. Have you seen the show "The Undateables"? Theres always someone out there for someone. I have a lot of female friends and I hear their horror stories too. I must be one of the very few who have never been stood up but I have heard two of my friend have this happened to them when the guy never turned uo. My other friend also went to the pub with a guy and walked to the bar and she ordered drinks and picked them up and turned around. Only to see the guy walk out the door and the door close behind him. Another date she went on the guy said he had to go outside to make a phone call and never came back. Its just another story but OLD is addictive because you cant help but think that person will be out there. However don't just use OLD. get out and so things with your friends. You can meet friends from all over and they will have friends of friends you might like. For me, Ive tried everything. Might sound awkward but I ve been known to get to know people in shops and asked them out! Only one has stayed friends for me for 4 years but most just fade away. You just have to move on.
  12. Boo1986. Please don't be too disheartened with it. Its the nature of the beast of OLD. Ive been doing it for over 10 years now on and off. In this time Ive only ever had 2 mini relationships. Nothing really has come out of it all. You have to be strong and take rejection as it comes. I tend to message people talk for a couple of days and then ask for a date. A lot of people who are interested will agree and set a date but you will get time wasters. Time wasters who when you ask for a date post pone or just talk online. I tend to talk for a couple of days and then set a date. I do this as soon as I can because you wont really know if you like them or not until you meet them in real life. Also I don't have time frames with dates. The longest date I had when I was enjoying her company was 4 hours. The one I struggled with and didn't find any chemistry was one or two hours. Also using APPs such as Tinder or POF were originally hook up APPs. They weren't originally dating sites but people looking for quick meets or sex. Just keep looking and don't give up. There will be someone out there.
  13. I had this happen to me. I got ghosted and the exact same thing happened after a year I got a text. I found out she came back after a few failed attempts to start relationships with other people and came back to me. Ive also had other contact me when they were in relationships already. I believe they do this to check if you`re still available. A sort of ego boost or because theyre not getting he attention they need from their other half. I mean have you not ever wondered what happened to someone you liked? You tried to get back in touch with? That's human curiosity for you.
  14. Can you explain to us how ignoring someone will make someone attached!? Let me tell you this. This ONLY works if the other person likes you enough. If there semi or low interested. This would be just a waste of time of just stupid game playing.
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