Past Sex Life

[aphrodite24]

Should you tell your current partner about your past sex life? Even if they ask you to tell them?

[DN]

I think it is treading on dangerous ground to talk about past lovers. The absolute best answer when asked is "no one was as good as you!!". Say it with a loving smile and don't say anything else.

[melrich]

It depends what they are asking. If they are asking what you have tried, what you liked, what you didn't, then I think it is fine to tell them (as long as you are comfortable with talking about it).

 

If they are asking who you were with, how do they compare then I agree with DN.

[Enthusiast]

I wish I could talk about my past sexcapades. Not to compare but to do things with her that I did with the ex's. But basic survival instincts kick in... as in, I betta keep my mouth shut unless I plan to be celibate.

[Hope75]

LOL Enthusiast!

 

 

 

You can still try things on your girl that you did with exes, just don't mention the part where you did it with the exes!

[annie24]

I had a guy ask me once about my past. I said, "Do you really want to know?" and he said "no." End of story.

 

I agree with the others. Tell them only what you need to know... ie, no, you've never had intercourse, or you've never done oral, or whatever. But, for godsake's... no play by plays!!!

 

Enthusiast!!! Just say to her, "Oh... wouldn't it be fun if we tried this...."

[goddess23]

well maybe im just young and the one guy ive been serious with hasnt been serious with anyone else. and i know very well that im NOT A JEALOUS PERSON just generally i just dont get jealous. but i think its important that you talk about past relationships. not in detail but i think its important so that you just know where that person is and as well just to know okay well what did you like, not like. and as long as you make sure to emphasize that no one was better than the one you're with now!! lol a little white lying needs to be done sometimes. but ya i think its important. but as annie said, no DETAILLLLLLSSSSS just the basics. well yeah with that girl we had sex and it was maybe couple times a week or WHATEVER. but in some cases its probably best not to mention it. but i just find myself tlaking about my past and it just seems like part of moving forward with a new person.

[aphrodite24]

The guy I am with now is the love of my life. When we make love it is the most unbelievable experience each and every time.

[Hope75]

You should tell him that, I think he'd be very happy.

[Jecto]

I for one don't consider myself a jealous person, but I prefer to know my love's past, and I know she is the one I am truly destined to spend the rest of my life with, and I know that whatever she said, it wouldn't change the way I feel.

I also think it was based on a little male insecurity, because it was my first time when I had sex with my girlfriend, and not hers. It was also partly that she was still married, I wanted to know why she would get married with someone she didn't love. But I guess I just try to understand people too much.

Sorry so lengthy aphrodite24, but I just wanted to put an example of why someone might be happier if you did tell them.

[discordant_verse]

Honesty is the best policy. My reasoning behind this is simple.

 

Firstly, if she asks for it, she better be able to deal with it.

 

Secondly, I am looking for someone who would love me for who I am and the person I am now is an evolution of the person I was in the past. She cannot love me for who I am if she cannot accept my past.

 

Thirdly, I do not wish to lie to my partner and particularly over such a thing as my prior sex life.

 

Fourthly, if she is incapable of handling the fact of my past, sexual or not, if she feels herself inadequate even though I show her to the best of my ability my love for her, then its best we did not choose continue because, so long as she harbours this insecurity instead of dealing with it confidently, it will eat into her confidence in herself, in me and in our relationship.

 

Lastly, its a natural part of being in a relationship to learn and share of each other. The past will eventually come out. Better sooner than later.

 

DV

[DN]

I don't think anyone was suggesting you should lie about it. But some things in your life can remain private if you don't want to talk about them. Also, don't forget that there was a third party involved. S/he may not appreciate all the details of what you did with them spilled out. Sometimes discretion is the better way, even with a current lover.

[Rosex]

I agree with DN. I don't divulge every detail of my past experiences (it would take to long ) and to be honest I am not that interested in a partners past either. However, I think that if I ever found the guy I was going to settle down with, I may be more curious to know more and be happy to divulge more about myself. But even then, discretion isn't a bad thing.

[Dubz]

i think that if they r asking about what u have done and what u liked ETC then yeah i think thats fine to tell them and i personally would tell them about the guys i have been with coz im not with them anymore so why should they matter.

[Day_Walker]

I have rules of what information I will share and what I wont. For example I wont give names. The trick is to give information that can influence your current partners sexual behavior, for example what your particular sexual techniques you prefer.