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Girl im dating does not want sex


jmann45

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So I just recently met this girl.. Details about girl below

-24 years of age (i am 21)

-VERY rich parents (dad owns a mansion)

-was in an engagement for 2 years until it broke off a year ago

-she had a FWB for a year after that

-she then started going to church and dated another guy after the last one, and he ended up leaving her after 6 months because she did not want to have sex with him. Only kissing on her bed.

-now its me..

-this girl is drop dead gorgeous, model status.

So......

we were friends at first. We then became best friends, and she friend-zoned me. I told her I liked her and she laughed and thought it was a joke, then said that she didnt need anyone right now and didnt see me as a boyfriend. Just a friend. I continued to stay her friend and date others while keeping minimal contact with her. She invited me over a couple nights ago and I ended up going in for the kiss after a few hours of being there.. even after i knew she only saw me as a friend. She accepted it and we just made out on her bed until it got too late and i had to go. She wanted me to spend the night, but clarified she didnt want sex. We hung out again today and made out again and i talked to her about where we stand. She clarified that she just recently started finding me "sexy" for some odd reason and likes me alot as a friend also. She says that were still at square 1 and she just wants to see where it goes. Now, my question to you all is

 

Shes asking me to spend nights at her house, i do not want to end up like the last guy who ended up spending the night every night for 6 months and just left her because he didnt get any sex..

is she playing around with guys?

she seems serious about this

Im not sure if i should stick around or just leave

whats going on inside her mind?

 

Thank you all for your answers.

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Tell her that you don't think spending the night at her place is a good idea at this point because of what it may lead to. Tell her you'd like to take things slow and see where it goes. Be the guy that makes intimacy her idea and when it does happen, be there to deliver but don't go overboard. Just leave her wanting more. So basically the opposite of what every other guy does. Attraction is a push-pull situation from both sides. Push to hard and she'll pull away.

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I think she has this fix idea about all the guys want to just have sex with her because she is gorgeous and rich, also looking great and being rich, might make her think that she has a higher value, you have to earn her, she is not for free, she is really expensive actually, so she is testing all the guys by not sleeping with them, see who will stick around even without sex, she wants to be convinced that you are not sleeping with her because of how she looks but because you love her... Complicated I know, the problem is in her head, stay if you like and don t push anything, be rather indifferent, let her run after you... see what happens...

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Just because she doesn't want to have sex doesn't mean she is playing with anyone! There is absolutely nothing wrong with valuing oneself enough not to want to have sex until you meet someone worthwhile, and to want that sex, when it happens, to actually mean something. Plus to a lot of women, kissing and making out is much more pleasurable than the act of intercourse itself!

 

Instead of fretting about not having sex, why not just enjoy her company and get to know her as a person, no pressure and/or expectations, and if things are meant to be there will be plenty of time for sex too?

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Totally agree.

 

Yes she is a christian and has a bible on her table in her bedroom. which may explain it. but judging by her past, it should be that big of a deal. Also, I asked her some questions, and she clarified that she started finding me attractive one day when she saw me communicating with other people in a certain type of way. and it clicked in her head. by the way, she initiated the flirtatious mood, not me. i was keeping my distance from when she told me she only saw me as a friend.

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Tell her that you don't think spending the night at her place is a good idea at this point because of what it may lead to. Tell her you'd like to take things slow and see where it goes. Be the guy that makes intimacy her idea and when it does happen, be there to deliver but don't go overboard. Just leave her wanting more. So basically the opposite of what every other guy does. Attraction is a push-pull situation from both sides. Push to hard and she'll pull away.

 

I think i agree with this the most. Thank you.

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Yes she is a christian and has a bible on her table in her bedroom. which may explain it. but judging by her past, it should be that big of a deal.

 

She may be fighting an inner battle between what she wants (sex) and what her church teaches (abstinence before marriage). I've seen this pattern before with religious girls, and it can be VERY disconcerting. One minute she's all over you, the next she's pushing you away -- depending on which part of her is winning the battle at any given moment. Knowing that this conflict could be a factor may help you understand her seemingly strange behavior

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