Selfish?

[Wiseman2]

You need to tell him this. It sounds like both you and he have not adjusted to or had conversations about the changes when living together.

 

Adults who are old enough to live together have sex etc, should be able to discuss simple things like "Don't wake me for sex, respect my sleep" and "I need foreplay in order to be aroused". So Simple!

I like foreplay I can't just get my body aroused from him thrusting me dry because it actually doesn't feel comfortable.

[Coleworldx]

You need to tell him this. It sounds like both you and he have not adjusted to or had conversations about the changes when living together.

 

Adults who are old enough to live together have sex etc, should be able to discuss simple things like "Don't wake me for sex, respect my sleep" and "I need foreplay in order to be aroused". So Simple!

 

I've told him this but he's still done it

[DancingFool]

I don't know I want to talk to him about it without him feeling like I'm rejecting him cause it's nothing like that.. don't know how to put it into words

 

OK. The same words you've put here. Explain to him that dry ramming you actually physically hurts. If he can't understand that.....yikes......

 

Outside of that, why do you allow it? I mean you don't have to reject him as such, but lead by example, stroking, kissing, etc. Don't let him go there until you are ready. You don't necessarily have to be confrontational about it.

 

The whole boohoo "I feel rejected" is really rather manipulative of him and from the way you post here, I get the sense that it works because you are not very assertive about yourself, your body and your boundaries.

[JaggerJim]

Dry thrusting is kinda rude. I would have a chat about that.

[Coleworldx]

OK. The same words you've put here. Explain to him that dry ramming you actually physically hurts. If he can't understand that.....yikes......

 

Outside of that, why do you allow it? I mean you don't have to reject him as such, but lead by example, stroking, kissing, etc. Don't let him go there until you are ready. You don't necessarily have to be confrontational about it.

 

The whole boohoo "I feel rejected" is really rather manipulative of him and from the way you post here, I get the sense that it works because you are not very assertive about yourself, your body and your boundaries.

Thanks I will do today..

And he actually doesn't boohoo he gets quite angry and storms out of bed? Pathetic really! I posted on here to make sure the problem isn't with myself and that it's not me being boring. But now I look back I think no in far from boring because when we are both aroused I give him the time of his life, which is probably why he wants a morning dose every morning lol..

[DancingFool]

Thanks I will do today..

And he actually doesn't boohoo he gets quite angry and storms out of bed? Pathetic really! I posted on here to make sure the problem isn't with myself and that it's not me being boring. But now I look back I think no in far from boring because when we are both aroused I give him the time of his life, which is probably why he wants a morning dose every morning lol..

 

So....even worse....he throws a full out raging tantrum at you.

 

Like I said, I think you need to actually sit him down and be very firm and read him the riot act so to speak. Don't do it while in bed. This is one of those "we need to talk" type situations. His behavior is simply unacceptable.

[JaggerJim]

So....even worse....he throws a full out raging tantrum at you.

 

Like I said, I think you need to actually sit him down and be very firm and read him the riot act so to speak. Don't do it while in bed. This is one of those "we need to talk" type situations. His behavior is simply unacceptable.

 

I agree. Also it's like your trying to be the "coolest girlfriend ever" syndrome. You don't need to be that way. It is rude to just roll you over when your in the middle of a deep sleep and try and just pound you.

[Edmund Exley]

Look, there is a big difference between having morning fun and him ramming you every morning like you are some blow up doll.

 

^^^ This. As a man I could never imagine being so disrespectful.

[pippy longstocking]

^^^^ what they all said

[Coleworldx]

So....even worse....he throws a full out raging tantrum at you.

 

Like I said, I think you need to actually sit him down and be very firm and read him the riot act so to speak. Don't do it while in bed. This is one of those "we need to talk" type situations. His behavior is simply unacceptable.

 

I agree. Also it's like your trying to be the "coolest girlfriend ever" syndrome. You don't need to be that way. It is rude to just roll you over when your in the middle of a deep sleep and try and just pound you.

 

^^^ This. As a man I could never imagine being so disrespectful.

 

 

Thank you all. You've actually given me the answer I wanted to know.. confirmed that it ISNT me . I SHOULDNT accept it or feel as though I'm a killjoy and I need to be firmer than ever.. I will definitely set the record straight when he comes home tonight.

[Wiseman2]

Either you are accepting/acquiescing to it or you're saying no and it's rape. So why paint him like a rapist if you simply haven't asserted yourself enough?

 

Why play games? No is no and yes is yes, so don't cry rape just because you won't speak up and have an annoying new live-in bf you don't want to lose..

I've told him this but he's still done it

[pippy longstocking]

I feel really left out now

[pippy longstocking]

A RAPIST .....you are a trouble causer !!!!!

[lostandhurt]

Is this the same guy from all your other threads? If it is go back and read them all.

 

This is just one more terrible trait he has.

[Lady Amalthea]

Is this the same guy from all your other threads? If it is go back and read them all.

 

This is just one more terrible trait he has.

 

You are absolutely right, I just read them through and can't comprehend why the OP took him back.

 

OP, he sounds like a terrible person, you deserve better.

[Edmund Exley]

I've been with my partner for 11 months now and at the beginning it was great. Regular date nights got along well with no issues.

Recently his behaviours become more and more possessive and paranoid and I have to live two lives and not tell my friends were still together cause they hate how he breaks me down when we argue

I took his daughter on like my own and he's becoming more and more clingy. If I go out he's always questioning me and he doesn't like me liking pics of guys FACE on Facebook even tho he likes pictures of girls faces and bodies on Instagram. I don't have him on my Facebook or Instagram anymore because he always has something to come at me for. I drive and he doesn't but I've pushed him to pass his theory and his driving test is soon.

When were good were great and happy but when it's bad it's awful.

One time he kept cursing n arguing with me so I blocked him off everything. He messaged my work colleague saying " tell her I've took my stuff and she's lying cheating scum" I've never ever cheated he's insecure and I only fight to make things work because when we're gd it's the man I love and I love his family and daughter like my own but I'm slowly starting to wonder if he's even worth it anymore. My family don't like him anymore because of how he treats me sometimes aswell. I feel I already know the answer but my heart constantly rules my head and it's annoying.

 

Yeah, you need to get away from this dude ASAP

[Doc Blaze]

this bedroom mess makes sense now. He basically tries to control you in every part of your life.

[HeartGoesOn]

This thread has run its course.

 

Closed.