Feel like I'll never be able to have a relationship

[Lotusavx]

i know its way too soon to think about it even, but me and my boyfriend broke up 2 weeks ago. I'm starting to feel okay, and the shock of him breaking up with me is going, but I can't help thinking that the next relationship I have, and all the things I don't want to go through again! I don't feel like I'll ever build trust with someone again, and get to know them and go through all the obsticales. I know I am thinking too early, but just imagining all the stuff I will have to go through in a future relationship, makes me feel exhausted. Any advice? Thank you

[Wiseman2]

You won't make the same mistakes twice. No moving in together. taking it slow and making sure there is as much investment on their part as yours. It will go well because you learned what to do and what not to do.

the next relationship I have, and all the things I don't want to go through again!

[DoF]

Completely normal for you to feel this way. It's a dip in the roller coaster, a low....no big deal, life and relationships are FULL of those.

 

You WILL (in the end), trust me. Whether you like it or not.

[mustlovedogs]

I felt very strongly like that for about three months post BU. Then I could imagine vaguely someone else for a few more months. I'm at 7 months now and I feel fully ready to date. 7 months sounds SO LONG - I get it. You may be better long before. Just know that it takes time and you need to be gentle and kind to yourself.

[SooSad33]

Yes.. all takes time.

 

This is just how you're feeling 'now'. And do expect more thoughts & emotions to surface as time goes on.

 

No one wants this kind of hurt.. its awful

 

Just deal with the moment. Deal with today. Things will be different in 2 months.. in 6 months.

 

I have had a few break ups in my day and am leaning more towards the No more dating for a good while! I am tired of the emotional pains etc, involved with it all. I dont have that energy....

So... like my brother did.. he was single for 8 yrs before he found someone decent enough & married her.

 

I am in NO rush anymore.

 

One day at a time... take care of YOU.

[catfeeder]

Isn't it strange how the things that can make us feel the most isolated and freakish are actually a universal pain? We all feel this way after a breakup. Where do you think the song, "Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I think I'll go eat worms..." came from?

 

You've learned a bunch of stuff about what you don't want. As time goes by, you'll start to feel better if you decide to work it that way, and you'll slowly start considering all the things you DO want. And they may be a lot different from what you once believed that you wanted--so allow for this uncomfortable time of letting go of that stuff.

 

Head high.