theanongirl89 Posted March 25, 2016 Author Share Posted March 25, 2016 Well, today I'm not doing thaaaaaaaat okay, but not thaaaaaaaat bad. I feel replaced and like I never meant a single thing he said, but as you guys said, he's a nutcase. Ignore everything he said. Hes bouncing his guilt off you, trying to justify his behavior, pushing the blame on you. He is wrong and he KNOWS it. I do really think that I was wrong sooo many times, but I treated him like the last glass of water in the middle of the desert. I know I have a short temper, but I loved him very deeply. I think he's blaming me because he knows that what he did it's a douche move. Thank you for your support. I spend a lot of time in this forum, looking for advise or other stories like mine, wanting to know how long does it takes to stop feeling anything towards him. We had sex two hours before breaking up, and I told him I felt used. He told me he regrets having sex that day, because right now I feel so used... I don't need someone like that... At all. Link to comment
starlight89 Posted March 25, 2016 Share Posted March 25, 2016 We all are guilty of being snappy at times when we spend so much time with a partner. Little spats are normal and you have nothing to feel guilty about. Don't blame yourself or beat yourself up. What he did is on a completely different level and there is no excuse for it. Only he has control of his behavior. Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted March 25, 2016 Author Share Posted March 25, 2016 I know that but you know, you start wondering and going back to the memories you have when you could have acted or reacted differently, and you start to wonder if he's right, if I caused all this, if I pushed him away... Link to comment
chitown9 Posted March 26, 2016 Share Posted March 26, 2016 I know that but you know, you start wondering and going back to the memories you have when you could have acted or reacted differently, and you start to wonder if he's right, if I caused all this, if I pushed him away... Even if you did him away....his behavior is simply outrageous! Link to comment
kbbcoop77 Posted March 26, 2016 Share Posted March 26, 2016 Just stay no contact and believe me you'll be just fine. Take what you learned from this relationship into your next one! Failed relationships are great tools for improving oneself and really knowing what you want, what your boundaries are. BUT take some time to reflect, don't just start a new one right away. Heal yourself first so this guy is gone from your mind and feelings. Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted March 26, 2016 Author Share Posted March 26, 2016 Yesterday I put everything on a box. He told me Ireland wasn't that great... I don't know anymore. I put all memories and his clothes on a box. I don't want anything of him in my life. Link to comment
chitown9 Posted March 26, 2016 Share Posted March 26, 2016 Have a friend give him the box.... Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted March 26, 2016 Author Share Posted March 26, 2016 He told me "you could give me my stuff in a while..." Yeah, sure. Link to comment
starlight89 Posted March 26, 2016 Share Posted March 26, 2016 Tell him it is outside the front door. He has until Monday to pick it up or its going to charity! Be done with him Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted March 27, 2016 Author Share Posted March 27, 2016 Oh crap. I had to block all my accounts because his new girlfriend is stalking me. What do I do??? They won't leave me alone... I had to lock my Twitter and Instagram account... Do you have any advice? It's like their lives revolve around mine. I'm really tired of this drama. I just want it to stop. She tells him I'm a wh*re (because he actually told me) and blablabla. Do you have any advice? It's like I have to protect myself from them. I never thought he would let this happen to me. Link to comment
starlight89 Posted March 27, 2016 Share Posted March 27, 2016 She feels threathened by you and rightly so. She will always feel insecure with him because of you and because of how they got together. Just block them both on all social media and avoid going on it for awhile. They are being so immature and cruel. They need to grow up and get a life! Get all dressed up and go hang out with friends, with people who make you laugh. Go and get your hair or nails done during the week, join the gym if you can afford it or just go for a long walk everyday. Get a puppy. Animals are great to help heal a broken heart. I got my dog when my aunt passed away and it was great for me to just come home from work and cuddle her. Little things will make you smile and you will slowly start to heal Link to comment
mandeelove Posted March 27, 2016 Share Posted March 27, 2016 The only power us women have after being hurt is doing NC. Make them feel they dont exist. Not even to get them back but to get away from nonsense. U took alot, u begged too but its ok. U tried it all and he went to a girl. U need to take that mental picture and stick with it. Never regret ur actions because u fought for love ! He didnt. Karma will give u someone great and he will crying. Stay nc Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted March 27, 2016 Author Share Posted March 27, 2016 Guys, you truly inspire me to start healing myself. You are a huge support for me. I never thought I would be so happy to come to this place and read your awesome answers. I want a puppy but I work a lot and I cannot take her of him/her I just want to start healing without them getting in my way. I do think she feels threatened because of me. I would if I were her. They already destroyed a person, I don't know what else could they possibly want from me. Link to comment
madforyoy Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 Would you believe me if I said, You share EXACTLY the same story as mine! wow. its like what happened to me and I would have wanted to express. After reading this, It felt like it was me who posted this. You are not alone. I had to go through exactly the same thing. 5 years, breakup over a fight, ex moves on. in 2-3 weeks with a friend who always had deel feelings for him and who he was pretty close to. But honestly I do not want him back. I feel betrayed by him than by her. Because the choice was all his. Even he told me he wanted to stay single for a while but surprisingly jumped into her arms in weeks. Deeply hurt but Lesson learnt. Let go and move on. you dont need him at all. For the love that we have. Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted March 31, 2016 Author Share Posted March 31, 2016 Would you believe me if I said, You share EXACTLY the same story as mine! wow. its like what happened to me and I would have wanted to express. After reading this, It felt like it was me who posted this. You are not alone. I had to go through exactly the same thing. 5 years, breakup over a fight, ex moves on. in 2-3 weeks with a friend who always had deel feelings for him and who he was pretty close to. But honestly I do not want him back. I feel betrayed by him than by her. Because the choice was all his. Even he told me he wanted to stay single for a while but surprisingly jumped into her arms in weeks. Deeply hurt but Lesson learnt. Let go and move on. you dont need him at all. For the love that we have. Are you serious!??!?!? I would LOVE to chat with you. Whenever you have free time, please, write to me. I need someone who feels the SAME as me. Wow really. Thank you for reading and for sharing. Whenever you can, contact me! Link to comment
chitown9 Posted April 1, 2016 Share Posted April 1, 2016 Whenever you can, contact me! You can contact her. Send her a private message. She can reply back by private message. chi Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted April 2, 2016 Author Share Posted April 2, 2016 Today I'm feeling so depressed... I had my moments. Today is so full of grey. My life seems pointless... I can't remember the bad times. Scumbag brain!!!!!!!!!!! He doesn't contact me anymore. It feels like he doesn't feel ANYTHING for me. Like he forgot about me just like that... Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted April 16, 2016 Author Share Posted April 16, 2016 Guys I've been thinking of giving him back all of his stuff. I'm gonna meet his sister to handle her a box. Should I give him all of our pictures in that box too? Thanks! Link to comment
madforyoy Posted April 17, 2016 Share Posted April 17, 2016 Do that. Make sure you are dome with it. I burned all our pics. It still hurts. He hasn't contacted me. Not even on my birthday. I was so mad, I hear stories of him and the oother girl. I burned the pics. There is peace. I might sound a bit psychitic but its not doing any good. I just wanted to get done with him. Link to comment
madforyoy Posted April 17, 2016 Share Posted April 17, 2016 Its okay, take time to grieve. But don't sit there wallowing for too long. He doesn't deserve you. Make up your mind. Link to comment
theanongirl89 Posted May 1, 2016 Author Share Posted May 1, 2016 Soooooooooo. This is an update. After one month of NC at ALL, he wrote to me on friday night. I posted a song on my Twitter (a cover of "Love yourself"). For minutes later, I got this (that means he's stalking me! The whole time...): "Hi, Swan, how are you doing?" And then we started talking. He told me he has lost all interest in life, he feels like s*it, he doesn't write as much as he did before... He asked me how I was doing and he got no reply. I went to take a shower and when I came back he was still writing to me. "Are you going out tonight?" I said "Nope, but tomorrow yes". He told me he's not in the mood of doing anything, unlike me, that I seemed to be having a nice time. Not even watching a movie on the cinema (it was our happy place). He told me he can't go to the movies. He doesn't "feel like it" (I work for a movie company and he sees me everytime he sees the brand that I work for). We talked about his life and I tried to cheer him up... I don't know why. But I tried. I can't see him sad or frustrated. I want him to be happy. After that he changed the version of what he said to me, when I decided to tell him I'm starting a new job next tuesday. It's like a promotion, you could say. "Woah, you're amazing. You deserve everything, you're brilliant. You started on an internship and now you're here. You worked your ass off to get this." I pointed out what he told me three months before, when he broke up with me, that life had given everything to me and I didn't have to make any effort. "Please... I don't wanna argue." After a couple of hours talking, I asked him why he wrote to me. He said "Because of yes. That's why". I told him "Well, if you're writing me for the wrong reasons, JUST DON'T. If you are bored, or you just want to feel less guilty and sleep well, DON'T even write to me". He told he wasn't writing me for any of those reasons. He just wanted to. Then he told me he was reading the book I recommended him (which isn't true... I posted a tweet of the book I was currently reading, that's all), we talked about the new blink-182 song, and that he bought the shirts I loved. He deleted his FB account today. This morning we talked. I told him I couldn't talk today, I had driving lessons. He told me "you must hate me so much, I should take care of myself, you running around in a car... You are going to hit me with your car, eventually". He was being silly, sending me a lot of emojis. I didn't respond immediatly, I took my time. I told him "I don't hate you. You know I can't." Then he thanked me like 20x times for responding him and that I should hate him. He started to tell me that he was having a creativy crisis, and he was having the worst time of his life. I don't know what to think anymore. Why does he contact me???? He wants to be friends?? Should I tell him to leave me alone??? I do want to get back with him if he puts effort in the relationship to make it work, but I don't want to be his friend. I can't. On the other side, I don't want to tell him to get out of my life, because I'm afraid of asking him what he really wants with me, and getting rejection again, and I'm afraid of going back to square one. What if he's trying to reconnect with me??? Shouldn't he be happy with his new gf??? Why does he starts telling me the things he bought because of me?????! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!help. What do I do??? Should I talk to him?? Should I wait and see how things evolve???? Have this in mind: I DO want to be with him. So what's the best course of action in this???? Thanks. Swan. Link to comment
Mononoskesquad Posted January 11, 2017 Share Posted January 11, 2017 I don't have an answer but anymore updates that happen after this? Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.