jobelle Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 I come to realize everyone is so different when it comes to this and I am wondering how you guys know you love someone. What are the signs that you have fallen in love with someone? What does loving someone but not being IN LOVE with them mean to you? Is that even possible? Do you believe love is some kind of overpowering, almighty force (i.e. love can move mountains, nothing is impossible with love)? Do you believe we can choose to love/not to love someone or that we have no control over love? Can you love someone and be in a relationship with them and sleep with someone else? If you have divorced parents - how has their divorce impacted your view on love and relationships? Do you know you love someone because you miss them when they're away etc? *fuzzy romantic things* Is it more of a "rational" feeling based in compatibility and common interests? Is loving each other enough to sustain a long term relationship? And if it doesn't last forever - does that mean it wasn't real love? Etc etc etc. Link to comment
dias Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 Is it more of a "rational" feeling based in compatibility and common interests? Is loving each other enough to sustain a long term relationship? And if it doesn't last forever - does that mean it wasn't real love? Etc etc etc. Yes,No,No I assume ... I was never in love so (unfortunately) i can't answer the rest. Link to comment
Liefde Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 Well it is different for everyone. Link to comment
jobelle Posted October 31, 2015 Author Share Posted October 31, 2015 Well it is different for everyone. The link doesn't work for me Link to comment
Liefde Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 I come to realize everyone is so different when it comes to this and I am wondering how you guys know you love someone. What are the signs that you have fallen in love with someone? Mmmm! Having thoughts of him constantly in the back of my mind...........! What does loving someone but not being IN LOVE with them mean to you? Is that even possible? Yes the way one love their friends and parents......! Do you believe love is some kind of overpowering, almighty force (i.e. love can move mountains, nothing is impossible with love)? No to many years on earth to belief love will fix everything....! Do you believe we can choose to love/not to love someone or that we have no control over love? Yes we can control it one can walk away from what one's heart sometimes want........! Can you love someone and be in a relationship with them and sleep with someone else? This is a big No No! for me.....! But it do happen just read this forum If you have divorced parents - how has their divorce impacted your view on love and relationships? Well it makes one think more of if it will work "making one more of a pessimist.....! Do you know you love someone because you miss them when they're away etc? *fuzzy romantic things* Yes I do tend to think that way out of personal experience.....! Is it more of a "rational" feeling based in compatibility and common interests? Yes for me it is, like if he don't love animals he already have a strike against his name......! Is loving each other enough to sustain a long term relationship? No not in my books, what about respect and rest that go's with it.....! And if it doesn't last forever - does that mean it wasn't real love? Well for me it is was real love I think one can find real love more than ones in life.....! But I think everyone may see it different and I may not even feel the same tomorrow for how I answered you today......! Link to comment
mike2305 Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 Its a feeling in your heart Link to comment
Andrina Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 I'm not going to answer every question, but I'll say that a person should have a must have list such as: faithful, kind, respectful, financially stable, sexy, fun, sexually compatible, chemistry for both people, affectionate, similar life goals, similar ethics. A deal breaker list should include: addictions to porn, narcotics, gambling, unfaithful, emotionally and physically abusive, financially unstable, low work ethic, no chemistry, different life goals, different ethics. If the person you're dating doesn't match the list of must haves, and has deal breakers, then move on and keep dating until you find someone who is a good risk for your heart. The first half of the year is usually infatuation. If the relationship lasts longer, it usually evolves into love as time goes on, but that defining point is hard to pinpoint in my experience. Good things to see as time goes by is how a person cares for you when you're sick or need help, such as dropping everything when you have a flat tire or something similar. People should match in how much time they want to spend together, where they want to eventually live, if they want to marry and have kids or not. If they want a pet or not. Everyone has flaws, but they should be minor, and the good should outweigh the bad. The flaws cannot be deal breakers. Daily effort has to be put into a relationship, or there will be an emotional disconnection. Arguments shouldn't involve name calling and belittling. The goal should be to come to a consensus. These are the things I've learned with my half century on the planet. Link to comment
Hermes Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 "However, the myth that romantic love is essentially (biologically) different from other types of strong attachment is created and maintained by cultural beliefs and our world views, not our biology. What most people are really trying to get at when they try to figure out romantic love is to explain the particular strong relationship between two people we call the “pair bond” (which is answer # 2)." From: "In love" and "love" are two different things. I agree with much of what Andrina says. Link to comment
zebragirl Posted November 1, 2015 Share Posted November 1, 2015 I come to realize everyone is so different when it comes to this and I am wondering how you guys know you love someone. What are the signs that you have fallen in love with someone? you feel amazing when you are with them, happy , calm, high when you leave them. (not desperate) They bring out the best in you. What does loving someone but not being IN LOVE with them mean to you? Of course it's possible. I love my ex, but I wasn't in love with him. Part of why I left. I still love him, like a friend. I have a special spot for him in my heart but I dont' want to be with him in any way shape or form. Loving someone, you care what happens to them, you like them in certain ways, you might enjoy being around them (or not) In love, you WANT to be with them, you go out of your way to do things for them because you want to, they invade your daily thoughts and you do things with them in mind, when you are apart you look forward to the next time you are together, when you are together, just being together is enough, you could be doing anything , and as long as you are together, you can enjoy the time, you get those little butterflies Is that even possible? Do you believe love is some kind of overpowering, almighty force (i.e. love can move mountains, nothing is impossible with love)? not sure Do you believe we can choose to love/not to love someone or that we have no control over love? you can choose to love someone but that's not the same as "in love" . You don't choose chemistry or in love feelings. Just like a parent has to "choose " to love their kid at times, when the kid is being horrible and rude and not cooperating. You can continue to love someone and choose to even when they are being unlovable. Can you love someone and be in a relationship with them and sleep with someone else? yes you can. that's whey there are polyamorous relationships and open relationships. It's not all about sex. you can even be in love with multiple people. If you have divorced parents - how has their divorce impacted your view on love and relationships? my parents are still married and have been married over 35 years. They haven't been happy alot of that time. I have wished they would get divorced. Their choice to stay together actually influenced me to get divorced in a way. I am getting divorced and although I dont' base my decision on theirs, I see how unhappy my mother has been and how she chose to stay despite her being miserable and depressed. she loves my dad but often I wondered why she stayed. I didn't want to live my life and be with my ex for the next 30 years unhappy and miserable. I am so glad i left. I couldn't live like my mom Do you know you love someone because you miss them when they're away etc? *fuzzy romantic things* that's one of the ways Is it more of a "rational" feeling based in compatibility and common interests? no it's not rational. If love were based just on compatibility you'd be compatible with any number of people. But people don't fall in love that way. Is loving each other enough to sustain a long term relationship?no. There has to be a chemistry, emotional and soul/spiritual connection for it to really work. People stay together for all kinds of reasons despite their happiness or unhappiness. For me "loving" my ex wasn't enough. The chemistry was non existent. The emotional connection was severely damaged and being friends and caring for him and loving him wasn't enough to make it work And if it doesn't last forever - does that mean it wasn't real love? I think all relationships change and just because something ends doesn't mean it wasn't real. Etc etc etc. My reply is in bold Link to comment
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