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Everything posted by zebragirl

  1. If it’s a fantasy and you role play it should be fine . If it’s something you don’t want to role play and you say no and he does it anyway it becomes actual rape . Is he saying he wants to role play this ? Are you afraid because you think he would actually do this non consensually ? In domination and role playing it does need to be discussed beforehand and a code word for when one partner has had enough , some way to say no when no isn’t an option because during some role plays saying no and the other person ignoring the no is sort of part of the game or fantasy . That’s when a safe word comes into play . If you trust him to actually listen to and respect the safe word it can be ok . If his idea is to actually rape and ignore any safe words then HE isn’t safe at all . There has to be a line between reality and acting out a fantasy . Communication is the only way to figure out that line.
  2. Oh hon this was so me when I left my first marriage . Shy but inside I was a bad bad naughty girl who wanted punished . Not too hard but still punished . Fortunately I met someone who fulfilled that for me. He would tell me to call him daddy and he would spank me . Then he would pin down my wrists and bite my thighs . Oh yeah . I didn’t know what I wanted at all so the first time he bit my thigh was a startle and a turn on . He’d pleasure me and then intermittently bite my thighs . Or talk dirty to her in detail , telling your how she’s going to have to take her punishment like a good girl , you’re going to punish her with your long hard rod lmao. It sounds like she wants you to dominate . Make sure you have a code word for when or if something is too much . Talk about it after too and cuddle . Always cuddle after . There such a thing I can’t remember what it’s called but like a post sub syndrome after a person has been dominated that can feel kind of depressing and scary . And it’s kind of surprising if you never experienced it or expected it before . So make sure to cuddle and talk after and make sure she’s ok . She won’t know she needs that if shes new to this . I know I didn’t but make sure you remember
  3. link removed This was recommended to me by another mom and I thought of you when you said your child is special needs.
  4. I hope you can find the strength in you to find a better tomorrow and happiness for yourself and your child. I know a special needs child complicates things but don't let that hold you back. Your son/daughter needs to see you happy, hopeful and healthy, not miserable and sad. (((hugs))). There are resources out there for divorce with special needs.
  5. I have read that female parts are made to expand and accommodate. That said, two things, you need to be sufficiently warmed up and excited, you likely will need extra lube. And the last thing, it is possible to be physically mismatched if being warmed up and taking time, is still too painful, it's possible for him to be very large and you to be smaller than average, not saying that will happen. Give things a try first, and go from there. If he is patient and you both take it slow, if you are warmed up, all could click so to speak. I think part of it is being in the right mindset, so if you are super nervous, you'll be more tense thus causing problems even if potentially it could work just fine.
  6. I saw a video blog by an autistic girl and she said the main reason that Autism speaks isn't good is because they want a cure. You can't cure something that is not a disease. Autism isn't a disease. It's a developmental condition . Something people are born with. That's why they believe there isn't a cure. They don't want to be fixed rather to be understood.
  7. I wish someone with a good sense like you could observe my daughter.
  8. Interesting. I can see all the features in my daughter. She not he told diagnosed. I suspect she has asd but not sure yet. Some of the pictures almost seemed like they were grasping at straws though to me. Like there was one picture of a little boy that wasn't used in the study but I didn't think he had wide set eyes at all. His eyes looked very close. But it is very interesting
  9. Do kids with aspergers have trouble sleeping typically?
  10. I don't know if you've addressed this buy from a lot of the reading I've been doing asperfers I girls presents differently than in boys. My four year old is a girl so it is of interest to me. I am reading the books Aspergirls right now and finding it very helpful . One thing I noted in one of your original posts on asd is unusual interests. In girls the interests are often typical as far as type if interests, animals, ponies, princess etc. The difference is the intensity in the focus on those interests. So often girls are very good mimics so they may not come by Social interaction naturally easily, they do learn to mimic appropriate behaviour and thus end up not getting diagnosed as early or as easily as boys. Often another girl takes them under their wing and helps them along. Sometimes it's not diagnosed till they are older and it's more obvious there is a difference. I can see the mimicking in my daughter. She mimics everything. But she doesn't do things naturally. She doesn't tell people she loves them or give hugs. She'll respond to me telling her I love you, only at bed time and only recently started this, kind of like she knows it's a response to repeat. But she doesn't say I love you like other kids. Won't say good night. I had to teach her that screaming when the grandparents left was not OK but they like it when we say goodbye and wave or hug. She won't hug but now she'll wave and say goodbye. She wouldn't so it from just watching. Only when I told her "this is what we do and what we don't do". She plays with other kids by mimicking. We are having her evaluated by a developmental pediatrician in January. I just hope we get someone good that knows asd emptiness girls.
  11. I suspect my 4 year might have aspergers. So I am reading along
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