boniver88 Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 hello everyone, i have a question so i was hoping outsiders opinion could help. anyway, long story short: i met a really sweet girl 2 months ago and we hit it off really quickly. 3 weeks into the relationship and spending a lot of time together i said "i love you" because i genuinely felt that way and she said it back (actually she wanted to say it first, or so she says). also, she said some pretty big things, met her parents and friends and so on which actually gave me courage to open myself to her more. and she is a giver type to be honest. anyway, last night we were on the phone and i said "i love you so much" and she dropped "how can you, you know me only for two months?" which left me feeling kinda weird. after telling her what i love about her she said she's just not comfortable with those words right now which is fine by me though she said "i love you" and "i love you too" on previous occasions. so what do you guys make of all this? Link to comment
GodsChosen Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 Shes prob going into protective mode. Most women thar have ever dated has learned a lesson or two about loosely using those words. You two may really love each other. An exboyfriend of mine yold me he loved me after dating a month and a half. Surprised me because I wasnt use to it. I felt the same but wasnt gonna say anything. Find out about her dating history and you'll prob understand why she said that. But word of advice. Take your time. Dont rush things. If shes unconfortable with saying that than back off until shes ready. Esp if she was hurt or betrayed before it takes time for us to figure out if you or diff from the rest. Link to comment
boniver88 Posted September 20, 2014 Author Share Posted September 20, 2014 thanks for the reply. it makes a lot of sense. Link to comment
mhowe Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 She also may have told her friends or family and they explained that love doesn't happen that quiclkly. Link to comment
boniver88 Posted September 20, 2014 Author Share Posted September 20, 2014 We are both in late 20s so I guess her heart was broken more than once. Link to comment
SoulTaker Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 I'm on her side. How many dates have the two of you been on in those 2 months? The two of you are running on emotions. As mhowe has noted, somebody probably had a talk with her, and pointed out that she needs to slow things down, and focus on what she's looking for in a person, and whether you're a match. This "love" stuff is way too early, and you're coming on too strong. How can you honestly say that you know enough about her in only 2 short months to act like this? Link to comment
Natasha24 Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 I agree with her that you generally can't really know someone well enough in 2 months to say I love you. However, she doesn't really have the "right" to say that now, since she has been saying "I love you" for some time.. I'm not sure what this means. It's possible that she felt a lot of lust at the beginning of the relationship, and she thought that was love. Now more time has passed and she realizes it's not quite love yet. Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 Seemed like a good idea at the time. Chemicals were swirling around her brain, she felt the euphoria that can happen when with attraction. At that moment in time when she said I love you, she believed it to be true. Once away from the excitement she felt differently. She realized the weight of what you two were saying and it made her uncomfortable. Don't panic. Slow down. Accept she is stepping back, not away. one of the best things you can learn in life is not to make any decision in the heat of battle. Not when you are excited. Not when you are angry. Never, never in an emotional state. When you say "I love you", it should be after some calm, rational thought. Then you can wait for the fireworks and tell her. Easy in theory, extremely difficult in practice. Link to comment
boniver88 Posted September 20, 2014 Author Share Posted September 20, 2014 Seemed like a good idea at the time. Chemicals were swirling around her brain, she felt the euphoria that can happen when with attraction. At that moment in time when she said I love you, she believed it to be true. Once away from the excitement she felt differently. She realized the weight of what you two were saying and it made her uncomfortable. Don't panic. Slow down. Accept she is stepping back, not away. one of the best things you can learn in life is not to make any decision in the heat of battle. Not when you are excited. Not when you are angry. Never, never in an emotional state. When you say "I love you", it should be after some calm, rational thought. Then you can wait for the fireworks and tell her. Easy in theory, extremely difficult in practice. this might be the best piece of an advice i got here. thanks a lot, man Link to comment
boniver88 Posted September 20, 2014 Author Share Posted September 20, 2014 don't know does it make any sense anymore but she just ended a phone call with "see you later, my love" Link to comment
missmarple Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 don't know does it make any sense anymore but she just ended a phone call with "see you later, my love" She's obviously crazy Link to comment
mhowe Posted September 23, 2014 Share Posted September 23, 2014 She is young and immature and likes the idea of romance rather than understanding what love is all about. Link to comment
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