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Can't get over my ex boyfriend!


blingthisaznki

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Paul and i had been together for 6 years. After being together too long i feel like we lost the sparks & feelings for him. So therefore i broke up with him in ending of June 2013. After 3 weeks we been hang out like his house, watch movies, going out to dinner and even shopping too. Even though we broke up it feel like we are still together but with no titles. About the beginning Dec this girl name Erica confused her love for Paul and on the time she was still in a relationship with someone else for 2 years. She told Paul that she is willing to break up her 2 years relationship and be with Paul. So she broke up with him on Sunday and next day Paul has ask her out. So little background about them. Paul and Erica work for HMSA insurance company in Hawaii, same floor but different department. They had been hang out getting lunch everyday for 1 month before she started to like him. After i found out Paul has feeling for her i got sooo mad & jealousy. In my mind how can you date someone for so fast after we been together for 6 years. Paul and i had talk about the our relationship and he told me he move on. I don't know what if he is really move on or he just in a rebound relationship. After Paul ask Erica out they already had sex and she even sleep over his house. There relationship is going sooo fast to the point its not normal. So now i can't get over him. Ill been telling myself that he has a gf and that he move on so why am i still crying and thinking about him everyday.

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You left him because you didn't feel the sparks anymore and once he finds someone he likes you decide you want him back? You did this to yourself. It's not his fault. Did you really think that he would stay single forever? It's not his prerogative to put his life on hold till you decide whether you really love him or not. I feel great sympathy for you but you only have yourself to blame.

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There relationship is going sooo fast to the point its not normal. So now i can't get over him. Ill been telling myself that he has a gf and that he move on so why am i still crying and thinking about him everyday.

 

No whats normal is tossing someone aside, then being upset that someone else wanted them. Time to grow up. The sparks don't last forever, the love does. You didn't treat him with love, you dumped him.

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The problem is you both broke up, but you didn't really. You continued to come hang out with him and as you said it was just like it had been without any labels. The problem with doing that though is neither of you had to do the heavy lifting of a breakup--i.e. learn to stand on your own and each go out and find yourselves new partners and learn to deal with life without each other. In fact, Paul and you were and both are free to go out and find other people. It sounds to me though like you got comfortable and just never pushed past that comfort zone to find something new, Paul did.

 

Lesson to be learned, don't expect to stay friends with an ex and have it stay the same. Sooner or later someone new will come along and then one or the other of you is going to feel hurt and abandoned. View this another way though: life is telling you it's time to let go of comfortable and find the spark again with someone new.

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Loss is never easy. Im sure he still has many of those same feelings you have for him. Can't rid of them that fast. They'll be there for a few months.

Is this a rebound? Yes, possibly, being so fast. Never can tell how long it'll last though?

 

Either way, you did break up and it'll take some time to end all and 'let go' then the ability to deal with the many emotions that follow- can be rough,

But this is why you do NOT aim at 'friendship' with an ex. Because when this happens, it kills...

Aim AWAY from him now.. he owes you nothing anymore, vice versa.

 

It'll be hard, for a while to leave all alone- but it's best. For your own emotional/mental health.

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