He doesnt believe in...

[Emotional]

Their is a this guy is my class and he is always reall nice yet mean and flirttatious. We have grown to be friends i guess. I like him but ...

 

He doesnt believen GOD

 

Is there ne way of changing this? I want to get to know him bettter so i can take him to church. Tell him its real funa nd if he wants to hang out he should go Once For ME...

 

What do u think his re action will be?

[ShroudedSorrow24]

you're probably not going to be able to change his belief in god. He doesn't have to believe in god to go to church with you. I myself am Agnostic and I go to church with my family and sometimes go to youth groups at my friends churches.

[Meow18]

Well it wouldn't be right of you to try to push your beliefs on him. If he doesn't believe in God, thats his own belief and thats not wrong. His parents might not have raised him to believe in God, or maybe he just doesn't even if his family does.

 

If you become better friends, maybe you could just invite him to go with you once. Just because he doesn't believe in God, doesn't mean he can't give it a try. Don't try to force him to though, just ask if he would like to sometime. I don't think you should try to change his beliefs though. THat might just push him away. Nobody wants a friend who tells them that what they believe is wrong.

 

I know many people who don't believe in God. My boyfriend is included, however, my boyfriend is the sweetest person I know. So don't judge him based on his beliefs.

[ticklebug]

hmmmm...which GOD are you talking about? The God of the Christians, of the Muslims, of the Jews? Or do you mean the human-like God of the Mormons, or perhaps one of the many Hindu gods that symbolize a single aspect of the universal spirit? Let's not forget the multitude of Greek Gods...

 

depending on religion, backround, country, culture...there are a lot to choose from.

 

There is no "omnipresent" being...so just because this person you know doesn't believe in "GOD" as you have been taught to believe exisits...doesn't mean he doesn't have some type of religious background...one that perchance doesn't agree to a single higher power and all knowing, creator....etc.

[Stinkweed]

Sorry, but I don't believe in God either... But I think I would go to church again (I haven't gone since I was like 11) if someone invited me just to be with a friend, or to hang out with someone... So, he probably would go unless he is completely against it... The only thing I believe is everybody has the right to believe or not believe in what ever they want or don't want. Lol, you know what I mean? Anyway, I hope that helped.

[PAdreamer]

Here's the thing. What you're talking about is called "date evangelism", where a person dates a "non-believer" with the intention of basically trying to convert them. I've tried this before. I denied it each time, but looking back I admit that I did this. Sure I had feelings for the guy, but... *sigh*

 

There's a stage play called "I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change". Sounds off, doesn't it? That is all that needs to be said, I think.

[tea]

I don't believe in god either and I really don't think it's a big deal.

 

If my boyfriend were to invite me to go to church with him I'd go provided that the church people do not try imposing their beliefs on me. ... shut up and leave me alone, basically.

 

I'd sit silent when they pray and give them the respect they deserve, but I definitely expect the same respect towards my belief from them.

 

There's just no way anyone can say my god is real and your's isn't... and attempting to convert him is will more likely drive him away than anything. From an atheist's point of view, having someone trying so hard to convert me is pretty disgusting.

 

My high school friend tried.. and brust into tears, "But you're going to hell and I want to save you!" No thanks, if there are heavens, I don't want to go to your heaven anyways.

[Emotional]

there only is one God...for the girl who asked that

and im not a bad person or anything but im really falling hard for this guy. My beliefs concern only to date christians as myself is one and we believe in Courship. So i would feel real self degrated if i were to go on with this relationship knowing he won't change for me.

 

I have a bestfriend who is a similar situation where she's dateing the pasturs son and can't change him. So i dont know . I was just asking peoples in put's Thank You verymuch.

[atigdng]

Best thing to do is only maintain a friendship and nothing more, if you get to involved the bible says that he would be more likely to change your way of thinking then his, so be his friend be a good light and pray for him, I will to if you like, but you are being a little selfish though

[ticklebug]

there only is one God...for the girl who asked that

 

to you....but there are billions of people on this planet, and they don't all follow your belief, and it is hypocritical and judgemental of you to look down on anyone who chooses to believe different from you.

 

In fact, it is a form of prejudice.

[PAdreamer]

My question is this: if it's SUCH a big deal for this guy to be a christian, why are you even entertaining the idea of being with him anyway? If it's really so important to you, why don't you keep your romantic searches confined within religious circles?

[Emotional]

because i feel like he may change if i can get him to church. I dont know...I know im not supose to but i really like this guy for some reason.

 

And the girl who said im being Prejudice...

HUn U have a choice on whether or not to read or answer to this forum Mind ur own business

K?

[tea]

Well, ticklebug asked you which god you're talking about. You could have said, "To me, there is only one god," but instead you made it general and voiced everyone's opinion and said "there is only one god." Because you're raised a Christian you don't see a problem with that sentence, but I can tell you I find that extremely offensive and I don't even believe in another religion, so I can only imagine how much more offensive it'll be for the muslims or others. By saying "There is only one god," that is being prejudice. However, if you say, "I only believe in one god," then it doesn't come off as you think other people in other religions are all stupid or believeing in the wrong things.

 

The truth is, some people can be converted and others can't, but whether someone can be converted or not isn't up to you to decide, it's up to themselves. You can try asking him to attend church, but I can tell you this, if ANYONE in the church try forcing him to become a christian without him willingly consent to it, you might lose a friend forever. Church people are sometimes down right irritating and disrespectful when they try converting others.

 

I doubt you can change him and if he does decide to "change for your sake," he will be one of the most unhappy people in church.

 

If you cannot date anyone outside of your religion, you really should be looking only in your church as there are too many people sharing different beliefs outside of the church circle.

 

I can respect you only want to date people from your religion. Before my boyfriend and I started going out, he made sure I wasn't a protestant because he was allowed to date anyone but a protestant.

 

The bottom line is, be happy with who he is or move on.

[PAdreamer]

Emotional, here's the thing. It is unfair for you to basically tell this guy "I like you, but you're only good enough for me if you convert". He's not going to appreciate that. It's great that you like him, but my advice would be to move on. Don't even bother with him because this situation will most likely end badly. It would be better for all involved if you stuck to guys who meet your personal needs, including your religious ones. I understand how important it is to you, but are you really going to feel comfortable if this fella converts but then you find out the only reason he did it was for you?

 

I get the feeling that your beliefs are a very serious thing to you, and you wouldn't want anyone to convert if their intentions were not honest. You would want them to do it because they truly believe, not because they feel it's the ultimatum to being with you.

[tea]

hypothetical situation...

 

You meet person A who's ... eh.. let's assume Buddhist and can't date Christians. The two of you hit off great and you really want to go on dating, but he asks you to convert to his religion because you're a Christian and he only wants to date Buddhists. He's almost convinced that if he just brings you to his temple and let you meet the monks and nuns there you'll see how nice everyone is and you'll be converted... so he asks you to go to his temple.

 

would you?

 

.. most likely out of politeness you'll agree to go.

 

...now, the next will never happen in a Buddhist temple because they don't believe in forcing their religion on other people. BUT, they start trying to convert you and ask you to read their lyrics and poems with them and embrace the Buddhas with them...

 

would you?

 

... getting harder right? but you probably would give a little bit more just to be polite.

 

... then, they tell you if you don't convert you'll be the most nasty girl in the world..

 

... seriously, that's the treatment I get everytime I go to a church. I've been to more than a dozen churches now and none of them turned out to be nice.

 

Don't put him through that treatment if you like him for the least bit. It's just awful. If you do take him there, observe it from the 3rd person's perspective... and you might see how awful it can be for someone who doesn't believe in Christianity.

 

You might say, you'll be the person who's trying to convert this Buddhist, instead of the other way around... now, is that really fair? Should you be able to say your religion is the right one and he should convert? If you can say that, can he say the same thing?

 

I assume the person you like is an atheist... because people always "overlook" the fact that atheism IS a form of religion and they fail to respect that. People think because we don't believe in god we lack faith, and all they need to do is to put a god in our lives and we'll automatically convert... well, it doesn't work that way. Him being an atheist is just as valid as you are a Christian. You really shouldn't, and have no right, to try to convert him.

[avman]

I'm going to ask all of you to respect each others beliefs even if you don't agree.

 

Please do not criticize others beliefs in religion or lack thereof.

[OldGuy]

I am an atheist; I pretty much made up my mind about that when I was 15. I am almost 50 now.

 

If the young man in question was raised agnostic or atheist, he may be willing to change for you.

 

If he picked his believes for himself, he will deeply resent you making converting a condition of dating you or if you date him and attempt to convert him. He's made a difficult choice, he probably intends to stick with it.

 

I have gone to church with my wife and would do so again if she wanted to. But I did it for her, to be with her in a important part of her life. My daughter decided to convert and be a Mormon and I went to her baptism. I don't mind attending religious events that are important to those I love.

 

But, since I put forth the effort to allow room for their beliefs in my life. I kind of expect the same from them, to understand that I have chosen my path just as they have theirs and to leave me in peace with it.

 

I agree with PAdreamer, if christianity is that important to you, then don't date the young man.

[arwen]

In my experience, no...

 

I was raised a christian. My father converted before he met my mother, he was 27 at that time. My mother has been christian since she was born I guess. They are really really religious. And I am not. I used to be, but I choose not to be anymore. It's not for me. I was still in my church (6 years ago), when I met my ex. He was an atheist, but so in love with me that he was willing to give my church a try. He respected me and I learned that if I was honest, we shared more beliefs than me and my parents.

 

He did not 'convert' me to atheism, nor am I an atheist. We broke up a long time ago, and I still choose to have my own set of beliefs and respect everyone else's.

 

If your belief in God is so strong, don't date this guy. In the end you will be happiest with someone who doesn't bring too many conflicts in this area of your life.

 

Ilse.

[OceanEyes]

You can gently suggest or ask him to come to church with you, but if he declines, there is simply nothing you can do about it. He doesn't share the same beliefs as you, and as hard as that may be to accept, you must respect it. What if he tried imposing his beliefs on you and asking you not to go to church for him? Wouldn't you feel insulted? You have to keep in mind, that just because you and your family share certain beliefs, that it doesn't make them the "right way". If you were to travel to India or China you would face a lot of opposition concerning your religious beliefs (and I should also add that their population is much larger than ours is).

 

To be perfectly honest, if a guy who was interested in me kept nagging me about my Agnostic beliefs, I would probably lose interest in him in a big hurry and probably not even want to be friends with him. He respects you for what you believe, so you should do the same for him.

[RayKay]

It seems you are basing how much you are allowed to like him on what his beliefs are...or more specifically whether or not he believes in YOUR god...and it is just not right to try and force someone to believe in something else.

 

You can invite him along to see what it is about, but he can of course say no, or go and still choose not to believe. It does not make him any less of a person, but maybe you two are not good matches for each other unless you can respect his beliefs as he respects yours.

 

Personally, I get very offended if people try to "convert" me or tell me what I believe is wrong. I am not a believer in any specific god, I am very spiritiual and I will refer to the Dalai Lama here and say that my "religion"'s temples are in our minds and hearts, for my "religion" is kindness, love, respect for mankind and nature. Just because I do not believe in a "God" does not make me any less moral or have lower values than someone who does. I have gone to church with families of boyfriends for certain seasonal services, but if they ever actually had tried to change my beliefs, that would be a problem for me!

 

It is a big world, with billions of people, with billions of beliefs and many, many religions. There is room for us all, and it is part of being human to respect that

[Iceman26]

I agree with Ray.

 

Remember though that when you eventually choose a life partner, religion is going to be an important issue, because say you have kids, what happens then, you know? Just something to think about.

 

I am a deist, and my ex was a christian, and it caused us problems to no end! She wouldnt leave me alone about what I believe in and I got fed up with it and we would always fight.

 

So, I now personally make it a point to not date extremely religious people, or people who try to push their beliefs off on me, and avoid the headache entirely.

[Emotional]

i appriciate all of the advice and all and i apolgize for seeming a little idiotic. My beliefs are strong for God only and All the other people can go on with their own religion. I just fairly am asking about a guy who has NO beliefs

 

He's not Buddists or ne thing at all ....Sooo I was just wonderin how it would all turn out nd a couple people really answered my question thank u very much

 

Bye