What do I do now, Aunt with a problem.

[Jetta]

Okay so my brother's baby is too small IMO and I told him that they should be feeding her more often and that her growth being only in the 10th percentile range isn't good enough, despite what his doctor says about her being healthy and growing steady. They are breastfeeding, the baby is very fussy, and says GRR which leads us to believe she's saying she's hungry and they aren't listening! He basically told me to mind my own business, I told him child welfare is everyone's business.

 

My mom thinks I should contact the local social services and have them checked out. I think that's rash, but I've tried talking to them and they are know it alls who listen to no one because they think they know everything about everything. They're daughter was 11 lbs. at 2 months, my research says she should be at least 15 lbs at 2 months, and talking with other parents they think she should have been closer to 20-25 lbs. at 2 months. Regardless of where she should be she is at the 10th percentile for weight, she looks like an active newborn honestly. And I worry they're desire for a petite girl is creating a malnutritioned girl.

 

One thing about them is they are over enthusiatic about small things. Their dog a maltese is tiny, they comment on her small waistline, and call our dog who is normal sized, fat. This baby girl cannot communicate so I feel I need to but it fell upon deaf ears. What should I do now? Drop it, report it, what?

[helpme102392]

you should sit down with parents and talk with them and try explaing yourself for the baby health. do not call any services i know kids who have been throught the systems like that and it really ruins there lifes, they will take them away from parents and put them with ppl in foster care who dont care and just wanna collect a check and most of time its in bad places with bad ppl who do it just for money.

[Moontiger]

20 lbs at 2 months??? That would be a HUGE baby. My nieces were both over 9lbs when they were born and neither of them hit 20lbs for awhile. Most babies double their birth weight around 6 months.

 

Look, if they are taking her to the doctor and everything checks out then I think you should butt out unless you have other reasons to suspect the child is in danger.

[pl3asehelp]

They already have a doctor who assured them the baby is fine. Why do you and your mom think your research is superior to medical school and experience as a doctor? I'm with your bro - not your business and I don't trust you more than a doctor.

[avman]

20-25lbs would be enormous at 2 months. Not sure what research you are looking at but it sounds totally incorrect. If this couple is checking with their doctor regularly and the doctor is not concerned then I don't see why you should be concerned about it. If the baby was born petite at say 6 lbs and she is now 11lbs at 2 months I'd call that a pretty good weight. We don't know the weight gain that has really happened here.

[Jetta]

She born about 5 lbs. 7 oz. and I've done some further checking and I guess she's fine but she honestly looks like a newborn when you see her in real life, she's just tiny.

[journeynow]

her growth being only in the 10th percentile range isn't good enough, despite what his doctor says about her being healthy and growing steady.

 

Why is the 10th percentile "not good enough"? The doctor says she is healthy and growing steady. I think you need to back off on this. Their baby in on the charts, and it's not a contest, it's not "the bigger the better". She's healthy and growing, and that's good. Be a good aunt and love the baby.

[journeynow]

She born about 5 lbs. 7 oz. and I've done some further checking and I guess she's fine but she honestly looks like a newborn when you see her in real life, she's just tiny.

There's a big range for "normal" at that stage. Some babies are healthy and born at 5 lbs, and some are just as healthy and born at 10lbs, twice the size. Just different body make up.

[Seraphim]

She born about 5 lbs. 7 oz. and I've done some further checking and I guess she's fine but she honestly looks like a newborn when you see her in real life, she's just tiny.

 

She has doubled her birthweight she's doing great. 25 pounds at two months is utterly ridiculous that thing would be so fat it would be enormous! Most kids don't weigh that until they are 2 YEARS old. My son was 11 pounds four months old believe me she's doing fine. Smaller birthweight babies gain more slowly.

[Seraphim]

Not all babies are big porker Gerber baby. Some babies are smaller and petite and that's totally normal.

[annie24]

If the doctor thinks the baby is fine, I think you should mind your own business.

[Moontiger]

At two months, she is still a new born! That's why she looks like a new born. She won't become what you think of as a "baby" until 5-6 months.

[Seraphim]

No child is in any risk unless they drop below the 5th percentile. She's just not a fat porky baby and not all babies are going to be like that. That is just what people want to see. That is what a lot of people think is normal. Some people are genetically not going to be that way. I was an extremely tiny baby and so was my son and we were perfectly normal.

[annie24]

My friends' kids are about 27 lbs at 3 years old! Why would a 2 month old be 20 lbs????

[Seraphim]

My friends' kids are about 27 lbs at 3 years old! Why would a 2 month old be 20 lbs????

 

I agree my son was 28 pounds at four years old. He was very tiny but his pediatrician said he was perfectly within the normal limits.

[Fudgie]

They are seeing a doctor regularly. Forget all other stories and anecdotes. They are seeing a doctor and not neglecting her. You need to back off.

 

Even if the baby was not healthy as long as they are seeing a doctor, you need to back off.

[Batya33]

Agree with everyone else. My son was normal birthweight and I don't think he hit 20 pounds until somewhere between 6-8 months (he was 22 pounds at 9 months and that was considered above average for weight). Child welfare is everyone's business to an extent -meaning if you witness actual abuse I wouldn't blame you for doing something about it even if it was a stranger - but in this case, yes, stay out of it - I think it's great that she is seen regularly by a doctor and that she is on the charts.

[RachaelRosen]

If the doctor says the baby is fine, he is probably fine. Some babies are just smaller.

 

 

My mom thinks I should contact the local social services and have them checked out.

 

 

My impressions from this thread and others involving your mother is that she is over the top and also domineering and pushy. I would not follow her advice.

[Fudgie]

Yeah a good way to ruin your sister's life is to call social services. If you want to be a part of her life, don't call.

 

It's a waste of the service's time too. They need to be investigating REAL concerning calls about possible abuse. Or children. I so starved that you can see their flanks. Children beaten or left out in the cold. Stuff like that.

[jenny_mcs]

I think it's incredibly alarming that your mother is suggesting getting social services involved, despite the baby's doctor saying everything was fine. The slightest bit of research (via Google) would have shown both you and your mother that the baby's weight was right on track and your expectations for her weight (25 lbs at 2 months???) are totally off the mark.

[Seraphim]

If a doctor has anything to suspect they will call social services themselves in fact they are required to do a by law. So the baby is fine.

[abitbroken]

despite what his doctor says about her being healthy and growing steady.

 

Did it occur to you that she was a small baby, and therefore wouldn't be as heavy as some of the kids who popped out of the chute at 9 and 10 lbs? Also, there are some people that are just small. My sister was a small baby but not preemie - she was full term and she has always been small and petite and tiny (she is all of 4'10" but then again my great grandmother was tinier - 4'9" than her though she got heavier in her older age, even though my dad's family is all very tall otherwise). She was 5 lbs, 1 oz at birth and healthy as anything. And she ate like a HORSE. This girl was always eating, whether it was breastmilk or solid food later. I think that you just want to stir up trouble for whatever reason and everyone needs to butt out. Some babies are just fussy and colicky no matter how much they eat. It is just their personality and not based on the way they are fed. My friend has two kids and one was very fussy and needy and the other one was smiley and happy just about all the time. It is just the way it is.

 

Oh and my brother was 11 lbs at birth so he was a moose at 2 months old. He sort of leveled out and the other kids caught up to him when he was about 8 months old but he was this giant baby for a long time. Not fat at all - just long and huge.

 

As far as dogs, people that have a tiny dog don't necessarily make sure their kids stay tiny.

 

Unless the kid is bruised up and you see her ribs protruding out - she is not malnourished.

 

I think this is much ado about nothing

[Moontiger]

I just remember a boss I had. He was a father of three and all his kids were super tiny. The youngest was all of 5lbs when he was born. Babies are all different and if you are worried do some good solid research, read "What To Expect The First Year" it goes through month by month where a baby should be at.

[avman]

In my experience with MN Human Services they wouldn't do a thing even if a complaint was received on this. It doesn't meet any of their guidelines for further investigation. Now if the doctor called and said there was a low weight infant and he suspected the parents weren't giving proper nutrition that would be a whole other matter. But some random family member who disagrees with the doctor isn't going to get much credibility.

[bulletproof]

My nieces were born very premature and it took them years to catch up to a "normal" weight range. The doctor said it was fine, so I can't imagine why you would call social services on them.