Im so angry hurt right now!

[Emma8]

Broke up 4 months ago, several weeks of mind games, pushing and pulling, messing me around. Now he is seeing someone else which killed me.

 

So my emotionally verbally abusive game playing immature selfish ex called tonight, after several txts to see if I am 'ok' as I have been ignoring and doing NC for over a week. So he calls, I hang up when realise its him. Feel ok about that. Then I have a txt saying ''Thats enough for me. I have been very worried. Glad you are okish, Ill leave you alone now. Look after yourself xxxx'' We always used to put 4 kisses which has upset me and then saying glad Im okish!!! Im not. Im really not.

 

Why is it ok for him to happily walk away after being so cruel to me for months and a lot of our relationship. He ruined me and then gets to live happily ever after with his new girlf while I am sat here a mess. Like thats the end, see ya! Then to turnaround and say that txt. I feel like he has now had the control by hearing my voice, he thinks Im ok and that he will leave me alone and to look after myself, being all patronising like he never did anything wrong!!

 

Arghhh I feel so * * * * right now. I want to text him and tell him how hurt I am and that Im not ok.

 

Hate this. Ive been so strong, up and down but getting there and now this txt has just made me feel so sad, like its finally over. End of. No going back now, no changing, no more us.

[Clemente21]

Emma 8...

 

He's a game player and he keeps reaching out just to make sure you are "there"....that is evident by his text after you hung up the phone. Do yourself a favor...put something in your phone to identify it as his number so you don't answer. My ex before this new ex was "Peter Pan"...not sure what I'm going to call this new one, but I'll come up with something clever. This way I know NOT to answer the phone and to erase the texts before I even read them. It was how I got thru NC the time before last and how I intend to maintain it this time.

 

Once they think they can "get back in the door", they will continue making sure we are "there", just in case. It makes them feel good that someone is out there pining away for them......and that they can come back if the other relationship doesn't work out.

 

You have to stay in NC.. completely and totally.

 

And remember--YOU ARE VALUABLE!!!! YOU DESERVE BETTER!!! YOU DESERVE MORE!!!

 

And you know what? You'll have all of that and more

[vsw]

I know how your feeling my ex was the same. We were together almost 1 yr then the mind games,lying,cheating started.

I broke up with him and started NC for two months only to have him contact me to gloat about how happy he was in this new relationship, how much better she was, etc.

I hate him and it hurts like hell to say that but I hate that he gets to be happy after all he's done. So I told him "If your so happy why are you calling me? F U Now leave me alone" I then blocked him everyway I could.

 

That was 3 days ago When I get lonely and want to forgive him I think of all the bad he did then I go for a run, punch my punching bag, go online and look up weird random stuff, do anything to keep myself from talking to him.

 

Look at it this way

 

Your Ex is trying to still have power in your life. Don't let him, its ok to be sad but NC. Telling him he hurt you will only give him power over you.

 

If he wants to throw away a good woman for whatever dumb bimbo who'll have him then he never deserved you.

[Nebraskagirl14]

Emma! YOU SOOOOOO KNOW BETTER! He will only continue to hurt you as long as you continue to let him! Take your power back NOW by doing NC...

 

And take it from me! My ex went right to someone else so I get it. NC!!!!!!!

[Emma8]

Emma! YOU SOOOOOO KNOW BETTER! He will only continue to hurt you as long as you continue to let him! Take your power back NOW by doing NC...

 

I know!!!! What the hell is wrong with me!! I have just deleted the txt otherwise I would be tempted to keep re-reading it. I havent broken NC, he called me from blocked number, so I hung up straight away and I didnt reply to the txt (altho I really wanted to FFS).

 

Im just so angry/frustrated/annoyed/hurt/totally pissed off at the fact that he can do what he did to me and then walk away like he did nothing wrong. But I cant change that can I.

 

Plus how on earth can he think Im OK when I have just hung up on him and not even responded to any of his txts in over a week....! If that was me, Id think something was wrong! But then again Im normal. He isnt.

[markie6]

Number change time Emma ? Sorry for you getting grief

[Emma8]

OK so last night was rubbish and I cried. A tiny setback, but Im not going to let that ruin how well I felt I was doing.

 

After the txt that got me so upset (being the 'ill now leave you alone' txt) he called again this morning, no blocked ID, so I knew it was him and IGNORED! He left a voicemail sounding quite sad saying how he was sorry for tricking me into answering last night as he knows i cant speak to him. He said he was just worried and needed to know i was OK. He said he hoped I was ok and will now leave me alone.

 

So, I feel a little bit of closure today. Although I feel sad (and some part of me liked to hear from him in a weird way), I do think it will be last time now I hear from him (he cant keep doing this now if Im ignoring...surely!!) and I have to accept that as nothing will change. I wont let him hurt me anymore.

 

I feel so good to have ignored his txts for over a week (doesnt sound much but it is), hanging up on him last night and then ignoring him this morning.

[gemsyv]

The thing is Emma, I can guarantee you'll be on here tomorrow and next day writing the same post.

 

Have you told him to stop contacting you? If so, and he's ignored you then it's time to change you number? Unless of course you are still getting something from the attention?

 

I know that everytime my ex's name popped up on my phone I'd feel sick as although he thought he was being kind by making sure I was ok (it wasn't a horrid BU but broke my heart) I knew it wouldn't be the contact I wanted, i.e him wanting to see me to talk it through or to reconcile. So in the end I had to put a stop to it for my own sanity.

I miss him like crazy and every day is a struggle BUT the anxious feeling I had for the 2 weeks after the BU whilst we were still in touch has now gone as i'm not constantly wondering when the next contact would be.

You are going round and round on circles and even though you are ignoring him, that contact is still there and you are NOT moving on!

 

Please please tell him to stop or change your number!

[Emma8]

I do hope this is the last of it and he does leave me alone, but it has happened before and therefore may happen again. I hope not.

 

Its tricky as i dont ever want to hear from him or about him again, no chance of us getting back together as he has someone else and also treated me like crap....but that little bit of me is still hoping i will wake up and it will be all be a dream....or nightmare. Therefore checking my phone to see if he has txt the perfect reconcilation txt and is a changed man. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.

 

I do need to stop going round in circles. If he contacts again, I will break NC, tell him quite straight to leave me alone and hope he respects that. If he still doesnt, Ill change my number and save my sanity too....

[markie6]

Change it now for your own sake , make sure anybody you give it to is trustworthy. It feels a lot easier without having to worry about who it is when the phone goes beep.

[MissieP]

Hang in there! I am thinking of changing my cell number too because my ex has been bugging me lately and quite frankly I am tired of it. He disgusts me!