tygerwolf Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I was wondering how long it took a lot of people to have sex with their significant others. I just started a new relationship a couple of weeks ago. I've been with other guys before and have chosen to wait MONTHS before in the past. But the chemistry between he and I is so intense I can hardly stand it sometimes! But I want to do things right. I dont want to have sex with him too soon or late. We spend a lot of time together and I know he cares about me very much. He goes out of his way frequently to take care of me when I need him. So tell me your stories. And how it worked out for you. How soon did you and your S.O. have sex? Thanks! Link to comment
ur02111222 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Have sex when it feels right. If that time is now, then why wait months? Link to comment
Jd1983 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I don't think there's really a set time frame on when it's right to sleep with someone. You do so when you feel you're ready is probably the best answer. I've dated guys whom I slept with early on, and we still managed to have long term relationships. My SO other and I slept together about a month and a half after being together. IMO, you have to find someone who is willing to see past the sexual aspects of the relationship and realize that there is a lot more to a person than just sex. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I always wanted to wait until we were exclusive, in love, with strong potential for marriage. So, usually between 2-5 months. It was also important to me that we both be tested where the tests were accurate and an HIV test isn't accurate until months after your last partner. (and yes even with using protection, I wasn't going to take chances). The first time we dated, many years ago, we waited 5 months. The second time we waited a little over 2 months. Worked out great for us -it was what we both wanted and were comfortable doing. Link to comment
22n32 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 when it feels right... ive waited as little as the first night.. and as long as 6 weeks.. i really wouldnt wait more then two months though.. just feel anymore time then that, theres something missing.. Link to comment
thejigsup Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Ummmmmm.....48 hours? Yeah, it was a recipe for disaster. We were together for many years until he died. He said I didn't play games and he loved that! We always treated each other as equals and with respect. He said any man who looked down on a woman for liking sex was both a hypocrite and a chauvinist. He was my kind of guy. Link to comment
LDRohnos Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 One and a half years. Our relationship also (not coincidentially) ended at one and a half years! There are limits. Link to comment
Smile12 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 One and a half years. Our relationship also (not coincidentially) ended at one and a half years! There are limits. Did you two break up because there was no sex in the relationship? Link to comment
LDRohnos Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Did you two break up because there was no sex in the relationship? Bingo! You can probably look at my prior started threads if you are interested more. Link to comment
breath.o.fresh.air Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I've waited as long as 8-10 months (official vs. non-official) because the guy wasn't ready. LOL. But I've also gone with a friend before we had ever had a date (bad, bad idea and led to lots of confusion - mainly b/c of the friend situation though, and not about the sex at all..). I'd say go with what feels right for you. Nobody can tell you what's right or wrong, and you have to judge when you're BOTH ready for it. I think sex is an important part of a relationship, so I personally wouldn't wait more than probably 2-3 months with anyone new. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 We had sex the first day we met. It's a great ice breaker. but we had been in a relationship for four months and I knew I loved him. Neither one of us has sex without there being love. Link to comment
LDRohnos Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 We had sex the first day we met. It's a great ice breaker. but we had been in a relationship for four months and I knew I loved him. Neither one of us has sex without there being love. Until this time? =P No matter what you cannot love someone the first day you meet them. It's romantic to think along those lines but unrealistic! Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Until this time? =P No matter what you cannot love someone the first day you meet them. It's romantic to think along those lines but unrealistic! And that's a matter of personal opinion. Physically we might have met but I fell in love with him months before we met. So no, not this time. If we hadn't of clicked in person like we did on here we never would have slept together. Link to comment
LDRohnos Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 So you knew him before you met. I was thinking you met someone at 5:00 and were magically in love at 6:00. I stand corrected! Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 So you knew him before you met. I was thinking you met someone at 5:00 and were magically in love at 6:00. I stand corrected! Did you not see the part were I said we had been in a relationship for four months prior to meeting? Link to comment
capilot Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I knew one woman 15+ years before we slept together. The relationship lasted 5 months. Another woman I slept with within an hour of meeting her and we're still together six years later. Another 4-year relationship started with sleeping together on the first date. YMMV. Link to comment
april15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 2 months, lots of communication, 6 dates, exclusivity. I was looking for long term. Link to comment
Betweenthebars Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 First time around with hubby, the first night. This time around, the first night. I'm not normally like that, but I just really wanted him. Thankfully, he didn't think I was whoreish or anything, lol. Link to comment
tinkerbellkj Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 3rd date with my husband. It obviously is working out for us! Link to comment
Rose30 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I waited around 3.5 moths with my current bf, (which happens to be last week lol) he was leaving for a 2 week vacation and I felt like it was the right time. He is alot older than me and someone very well known in our community so I was a bit nervous, but it has worked out fine, although right now he is away and I miss him!! Link to comment
greywolf Posted September 20, 2011 Share Posted September 20, 2011 I had known my ex-gf a couple of days before we had sex, but we weren't dating. We did everything backwards (haha!) and started dating after we slept with each other. With the last guy, it was the first day we met, but we had known each other for awhile online. Link to comment
tygerwolf Posted September 20, 2011 Author Share Posted September 20, 2011 Wow, im loving the variety of answers here! The clear message im getting from this is that its the "right time" just whenever the two people are ready. That's fair enough. I consider myself to be a pretty sexual woman so im just going to do what comes naturally, when it feels like the right time... As long as hes ok with it too. If he wants to wait, i'll wait. Thanks everyone for your answers! Link to comment
Unknown1607307972 Posted September 21, 2011 Share Posted September 21, 2011 ..The same day that we met. We met online, talked for months with microphones and webcams, when he came to England to see me in person things were just so natural between us so it felt normal. We're still together almost three years later and we live together so it all worked out fine. I guess I also don't see sex as a huge deal, I mean I don't exactly go around sleeping with every guy I meet but I don't believe I have to be in love or committed to that person to have sex with them. It all depends on how I feel. Link to comment
mhowe Posted September 21, 2011 Share Posted September 21, 2011 My bf and I had known each other for 6 yrs. before we started dating -- so hard to say exactly. Was first "real' date -- on which he told me he fell in love with me before he asked me out! Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.