Excruciating pain

[ironman73]

Ruby-

If you can, I would consider a new flat. I moved shortly after we broke up and he has not set foot in my new home (and never will). It makes me feel really great. He has no idea where I live either.

It is helping me move on. All I would think about my was empty apt and how much fun we had in it.

Redecorating is great, but a new flat and new neighborhood is even better.

[Mr_LFA]

+1 to a new place. It'll really give you a nice 'clean slate' which will help you to heal much faster. It really worked for me a few years ago. Strict NC is the only way after this. Just think that he "died".

[ironman73]

+1 for Mr_LFA. Once that I think that my old ex 'died' and has been replaced with, really this dou*he bag, it is easier to accept. Same goes for you, baby doll.

[RubyWoo]

Hello everyone! Just thought I'd share how things are going since a lot of you offered wonderful adive and helped me deal with all this mess.

 

Well it's been 7 months now since he moved out, with limited contact. And the last 2 months have been absolutely NC (although indirectly I know he's booked flights to go see his family with my replacement... no comments about this!)

 

I feel sooo much better now, now I feel mostly sad about the whole situation. But I've come to realize this guy is a total sociopath, liar, emotional abuser and he isn't worthy of me.

 

I still get feelings of intense low self esteem because I feel fat and ugly and at the same time I realise that HE planted some of those thoughts in my head too by his demeaning words and actions towards me.

 

I feel alone sometimes but I don't miss him, I miss LOVE. I miss having a partner to laugh and cuddle with. I would never take this idiot back now, he would destroy me.

 

Well yesterday I went on a second date with a man I really like and we'll see how that goes... Hopefully there's a third date... and lots more!

[endor]

Your story really gives me strength to go through strict NC. Not even replying when she comes around to feed her ego.

 

How are you feeling after 7 months? Are you ready to love again?

Good luck with your date.

[RubyWoo]

Hello Endor! I sure feel ready to love again. And this time round, actually BE LOVED in return. Slowly I'm realising that my relationship was very one sided... and he wasn't mentally right, he said things that nobody would say to the person they "love"

 

I'm sure you can do this and you will feel soooo much stronger in a few months!! The worst for me came around the 5th month mark, since then I've sort of turned a corner and I'm never looking back...