Who are you TRUE FRIENDS?

[Eriel]

Do you ever question yourself, why you're friends with this particular person?

I'm a bit of a loner but the few close friends I do have I feel like they're not my friends at all.

So my question is, do you think this is a good enough reason to cut this friend of mines off????

Let me tell you about a particular person who I did consider my friend but, because of her negativity and bs. I feel like cutting her off. She is so competitive, always counting all the men who hits on me so she can compare us, she copies the way I talk, walk, dance, dress and even my career choices, its like this broad is mildly obsessed with me. I know this sounds like its high school and WE ARE BOTH ADULTS, but its annoying. Recently she told me how better she looks than me now, because of the attention she has been getting, its like putting me down to make her feel good is her goal or something. Its so annoying, and I cannot stand this person anymore. The only reason why we are even friends is because I'm always willing to pick her arse up and make plans. She never wants to drive or meet me half way or even pay.And all we talk about is her life, her ex, her life, her life, etc...everything goes back to only her life. And when she does find a bf I'm like axed out of her life permanently, so pretty much I'm only good as a friend when shes lonely.

 

I find myself better off alone in the library than out in the town with woman like her. I'm not a competitive person either, nor would I ever put down my friends looks just so I can feel good.

 

Do you think this is a good enough reason why I should just cut her off? And what indicates you from cutting friends off? Signs? Do you have a story to share about a friend you had to just give the boot?

[easyguy]

I only have a couple friends who I would do anything for. Most friends come and go from my radar, but only a couple are always there for me. There is an excellent video clip on YouTube of a sermon a baptist preacher gave on 3 types of friends. It basically comes down to, pick wisely the friends you wish to become family to you.

[sunnyv]

I cut off friends for the samw reason you state above. No reasons being with a friend who is sellfish talks about themselves and bsically doesn't give a darn about anybody but themselves.

[doesitmatter30]

I would cut ties, but I do that to everyone who brings any kind of negativity (or feelings of being used) into my life. I have one real friend, and I'm content with that because at least for me that's enough. So far everyone but him has turned out to want something I have, whatever it may be. Let the users fend for themselves. it's fun to watch them struggle, until they either sink or swim.

[LightbulbSun]

I had a friend that I gave the boot. I've known her for less than a year, but basically she used me to get a good grade in math, and then ditched me. She is a user, plain and simple, and although I was hurt, I felt satisfaction in not returning her phone calls and ignoring her as much as she was ignoring me.

 

She is now on Facebook, and she frequently posts about not knowing who her true friends are. Well, maybe if she actually CARED about her friends, she would have people in her life. She has some sort of personality disorder, I am very sure.

 

As far as friends who I know are definitely my friends:

 

I have a neighbor who I've become good friends with. He's called me when I'm feeling down, and so have I when he's going through a tough time. We've always been there for each other, and he is a genuinely good person. I'd consider him a very good, if not best, friend.

 

Also, my friend from high school, who called me on my birthday (he was the only one who did), and then took me out to a birthday movie a few days later. He calls me every now and then, even though I'm so socially retarded that I don't call him. He is a very good person as well, though, and I'd consider him also a very good friend.

 

And another couple friends I just got back in touch with from high school have been there for me. I have a few close friends, and a ton of acquaintances. Which is what I'm most comfortable with, because I don't like socializing all that much.

[Fudgie]

Life is too short for crappy friends. I'd leave.

 

Then again, I've cut off a lot of friends for one reason: disrespect. When a "Friend" does that to me, I'm gone.

 

Apparently this has left me with not many friends that I actually trust (maybe 1, or 2) but in my mind, they are the only ones I actually want to spend time with.

[90_hour_sleep]

Life is too short for crappy friends. I'd leave.

 

Then again, I've cut off a lot of friends for one reason: disrespect. When a "Friend" does that to me, I'm gone.

 

Apparently this has left me with not many friends that I actually trust (maybe 1, or 2) but in my mind, they are the only ones I actually want to spend time with.

 

mutual respect. the foundation for any relationship...friendship or otherwise.

[Stay_home]

Although I'm very sociable, friendly and easy to talk to, I don't have a lot of close friends that I really can trust. Then again, it doesn't always help that I don't trust anybody as it is. I'm always expecting that someone will take a ship on me at some point so I always keep my guard tight. I don't like a lot of bullcrap nonsense and that's the reason my life is so peaceful and less stressful than most other young people their mid to late 20s. I keep drama away with a stick. So anybody that comes around with that, they gotta go....

[Michele32]

sounds like this is a toxic friendship. because its not making u happy, its the opposite. i always thought that you cant lose friends once you have them, you cant "break UP" with a friend but thats not true. do u think she would change if you talked to her about it? it does sound like she is taking advantage of u with u driving and paying but you are also letting her do that. you have to stand up for youself. if you think this girl is truly a friend that will be there no matter what to listen or to help you out then its worth talking to her about how you feel. if you dont feel like she is that kind of friend then yeah maybe its time to cut off ties.

[Eriel]

sounds like this is a toxic friendship. because its not making u happy, its the opposite. i always thought that you cant lose friends once you have them, you cant "break UP" with a friend but thats not true. do u think she would change if you talked to her about it? it does sound like she is taking advantage of u with u driving and paying but you are also letting her do that. you have to stand up for youself. if you think this girl is truly a friend that will be there no matter what to listen or to help you out then its worth talking to her about how you feel. if you dont feel like she is that kind of friend then yeah maybe its time to cut off ties.

 

I don't think she will change, I'm avoiding her right now, shes been calling me but, I've just shrugged her off. I do let her take advantage of me and its really my fault for allowing her to treat me like that. I realized she is not that important in my life right now and I'd rather be alone. There is no point of talking to her, she always likes to play the victim game and blame everyone for stupidity. I guess I don't feel bad for ignoring her ugly arse anyways because she does it to me whenever she has a new bf.

[Applewhite]

^ Good for you for realizing all this and standing up for yourself. Good for you for realizing you don't need a 'friend' like her.

[tom1607307597]

I think your true friends are people you really love being around and always got your back when life gets hard. They'll also treat you like an equal.

 

There's this one guy I want to stop being friends with. It took me almost 3 years to realize just how boring he is to be around and how he tries to prove how smart he is in any conversation. Every conversation is about complex engineering concepts, it drives me nuts. That and I feel like we were friends for the wrong reasons. In the past I just asked him to grab lunch with me because I had no one else who would, and now I realize I was using him. It's probably better to cut him off for both our sakes.

[JoJo90814]

I think good friends are the ones you can always be yourself around and not judged, for they know you are not perfect and still love you. Basically just good people that you feel good around. If there ever is an issue they will talk to you in a respectful way about it.