Live for today?

[earthfairy]

I here this phrase a lot... make the most of your life! *smile* Live for today, because life is a precious gift that won't last forever! *more smiles* ... that makes me want to hurl. If I lived for today, and the way the world seems today, the way I'm hurting inside and the way nothing seems right anymore, if i were to live for this moment, i think the best thing to do would be to kill myself. The only thought keeping me from doing that is that I am NOT living for today *sarcastic smile*. I am living for the little moments that may come years from now. I am living because maybe someday I will feel loved again. Or maybe not. But when I feel depressed, I remind myself that I am not living for today. I am young, and I am living for the hope of something better, someday. Sure, sometimes I feel like the world is passing me by and other people my age seem to be smiling a lot more than me and it wont ever really get better... but thats when I remember that I am not living for today, they may be happy now, but my time may come someday too. Or maybe not. If all else fails, I tell myself, hey i'm at the bottom now, before I kill myself I minus well leave my mark somehow.. i write poetry, i write songs, i read these forums and try to give advice, i use those nerves in my brain by reading a murder mystery before i go myself, i listen to A.F.I., i contemplate the world, i work on my 'zine, and who knows, maybe i for a moment i might just enjoy it. even if my family is falling apart, even if my boyfriend dumps me, even if my friends don't call, even if i'm losing my faith, even if there is war and hate, even if the pressures are huge, and even if no one seems to care... because i care, and i live for the day when i can touch another human soul, when i can be there for them because no one was there for me.

[EmptySoul]

thank you for this post. i agree with you, i am the same way. if i lived for today i would be even worse than i already am. yes i know what all the people who use that phrase mean, but it is definitly not for me.

 

EmptySoul

[under_the_pressure]

I used to feel that way. I mean...I guess I still do, just not as bad as I used to. Same here, if I lived for today...well I probably wouldn't be here. Sometimes the things that keep me here, from hurting myself, are the thoughts of having a family of my own, getting married, being in love. I'm a major daydreamer and like to imagine my future. I won't live for today...but for tomorrow or the next day. And someday soon I hope I'll realize why I did live for that day. But always remember to Live you life to the fullest!

 

Under The Pressure

[toggle]

thank you, thank you so much earthfairy

 

you have answered the question, the reason why i keep myself breathing, and i think you have unlocked it.

 

I myself do wish for a family, house stable income kids ect and thats why i think i try not to think of the thigns that are/are not happening each day.

 

I believe in fate and i am waiting for that special thing that comes round the corner, i dont know how or when it will happen but thats what i guess im living for.

 

THANK YOU!

[jestersupriem]

You are living for life. Makes sense? Let me explain. You have 2 eyes, 2 ears, 2 hands, 2 feet. I assume you can speak and think for yourself.

 

Life isn't luck or sitting around for luck to happened. Life is moving. Look at ants, birds, fish. They move. Now lets look at humans. Some of us dont move. We sit in our homes doing nothing. feeling sorry for our selfs. Just because some of us come from broken homes doesn't mean your life sucks.

 

If you cant help your life the way it is, try helping someone else. People in Africa are dying by the millions with there civil wars. Imagine how much their live sucks.

 

Their is more to life than sorrow. Look around

 

oh ya toggle.... your hot

[Zappa]

I only read the begginning of your post but heres my advice on suicide, dont. I think about it every night but i no if I do I will only hurt the people around me. Suicide is a very selfish thing to do. Unless your like a rock star or somthin. If your going to commit suicide, do somthing that will make the world better at least before you die.

[toggle]

wow thatnks for the compliment (blushes)

 

ive never had a girlfriend, always thought i was ugly, main reason i wonna die im fed up with being alone

 

 

[JT]

Let me tell you something about selfishness and suicide. Suicide is only selfish when you've exhausted all of your options to get better. Youve given it time, medication, therapy etc. If you still feel very depressed, then its ok to perform this sin, else you will make everyone else in yuor life miserable far worse than if you decided to hurt them once for ending yuor life.

[avman]

I disagree. You say it hurts everyone once if you commit suicide.. But this is a hurt that lasts FOREVER. My brothers wife committed suicide 5 years ago and he's never gotten over it. Yes he has gone on with his life, but the hurt lasts forever.

 

Suicide is a PERMANENT thing. You will never feel better. You will never experience any good things in life. You will never accomplish anything else. Once you commit suicide, its done. And thats the real tragedy.

 

Trust me, people in your life want to help you. You are not making them miserable by living. You will destroy them by dying. Let them love you, and let them help you.

[JT]

Like I said, this is a permanent thing.. there is no later on. You must exhaust all other options and make others aware that you have given your fullest. To stay alive as to not hurt others.. is selfish of them to ask in their own right.

 

Think about it.

[Eh Im Canadian]

That was a great post earthfairy, thank you. your last sentence is basically my motto. "because i care, and i live for the day when i can touch another human soul, when i can be there for them because no one was there for me."

 

When I was younger, there was never anyone there for me. So I went out and made friends. But friends come and go, so I kind of gave up. I kind of just viewed everybody as my friend, since everybody knew me, and I knew everybody else. But I wasn't really friends with them. Sure I could go and eat lunch whenever, or go to movies, but there was just no connection. I couldn't trust anyone, and I wondered why I still was alive. Just then I was in history class in 8th grade, when I was feeling the worst I'd ever felt, when we started learning about the constitution. I read one little quote from Thomas Jefferson, that said something like "Every man is entitled to the pursuit of happiness." Then something just kind of clicked in my head. I am entitled to pursue happieness! I was yelling all sorts of stupid stuff, and from then on, I made it my goal in life to be happy. Of course then I ran into my problem of how I can be happy, and i found it makes me the happiest when other people are happy. So my mission in life is to help other people be less depressed, and so more people can be happy. I mean, it isn't liek you really have a choice when it comes to life. You can either live or you can die. There is no middle ground to half-die, or half-live. JT, i think you are absolutely wrong. Mostly, because I don't believe anybody can ever give their fullest. There is an infinite amount of things that could happen in your life, and what you do directly effects their outcomes. You know what your life could becoem in this world. If you die, there is no way to know what could happen. Don't take such a big chance.

 

So basically, all I have to say is, congratulations earthfairy, you have the best attitude on life that I have ever seen. Even though you don't want to, live life to the fullest, because after every second that passes by, you have one less second left to live. If you don't what else are you going to do? Life life half full? What exactly would be the point to that? Thank you, and Good Luck in the future.

[lost_666]

everybody goes through parts in their lives when they think "wots the point, im gona die sumtime". i no i sure have anyways! but your right, weve got to look for the futuer. someday there will be somebody who will want you 2 care for them and love them and in return love you back, u are not alone, and you never will be. so keep your chin up and always smile, dont let anything get you down!