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I'm messed up still...what was she thinking? Need your opinions.

DRaven2010

By DRaven2010
in Breaking Up Advice

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DRaven2010 Explorer

DRaven2010

Posted
Posted

Hi everyone!

 

Basically here's my story again & where I'm at now.

 

We went out for 4 months (broken up 3 months now). We were going ok, no issues, no fights and we seemed to be getting closer as time was passing & i was falling for her. She had issues about her ex (he was still contacting her trying to get her back but she insisted she was not going back to him, they had already broken up twice before, another woman involved and my now ex knew she couldn't go back to him, although she did admit there were still feelings there). She did say every now and then that maybe she should be on her own and get over her situation before moving on but she never did follow through until after 4 months together....

 

...it took her 4 months of us getting closer and then out of nowhere I get a text saying that she's been doing a lot of thinking and that she should get over her situation and then we see!!

 

It hurt me bad, still does, i couldn't imagine this girl could be so cold to me, end it with a simple text explaining that its best she get over her situation. We spoke a couple of times after and she said she wasn't going back to her ex but if necessary i should move on. I kept LC by text for a couple of months some back and forth small talk and wishing each other merry xmas and all that (me being the initiator). Last time i contacted her was a month ago to wish her a happy birthday..she thought it was amazing i remembered and thanked me but thats it!

 

I decided that would be my last contact...gone NC now for 1 month. She hasn't bothered to contact, no how r u, nothing. It hurts so bad someone that i cared so much about could be so cold. To me this meant that our 4 months meant nothing to her. I know she's selfish in love, she's admitted that but how can she pretend i don't exist? When she broke it off she did say she liked me.

 

Now I know NC is probably the best thing I can do for myself and if she really did want to get back together one day, i guess she'd make contact but its hard guys I come so close to texting her to c how she is, i keep thinking maybe if i make contact, maybe i can get her back but at the same time her not contacting me means i meant nothing to her in the end....classic rebound or she wasn't into me? But why do rebounds have to fail?

 

Am I doing the right thing by going NC or is LC better. I don't want to loose the chance of us getting back together by disappearing. What if she really does need time to heal before moving on. I guess I'm naive to think this.

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Ms Darcy Mentor

Ms Darcy

Posted
Posted

Sometimes to move on you need to set goals for yourself. Start going out on dates. Write down some traits that you'd like in a gf. Go out and enjoy life. Maybe even write down some bad traits about the ex. You need to be real here ... time can help you heal only if you let it. If your brain is working backwards trying to fix the past, it will take longer for you to move on.

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uncomfynumb Collaborator

uncomfynumb

Posted
Posted

You only dated four months for crying out loud! Where is your nutsack? Oh yeah, your ex has it...

 

Ms. Darcy is right. You need to set goals. Here, let me help you...

 

1. Get nutsack back.

 

2. Reinforce nutsack. (Not sure how you do this. Might call for some duct tape or crazy glue or something.)

 

3. Get back in the game!

 

 

 

Good luck!

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