THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[vi0let]

Day 38

 

missing him more than ever. i received a blocked call on Monday but i didn't pick up. i had a sneaking suspicion that it was him, but i'm trying not to look into it too much and give myself false hope. plus, if it was really important they would have left a message.

 

it seems like everyday is getting harder, everything drags. i can't believe he hasn't dropped me a text or anything of the sort. it's hard to believe and admit to myself just how little he cares. i really find it quite baffling indeed.

 

he may be waiting for me to make the first move. but for what ? i'll only get hurt more. no. if he ever wants to hear from me again, he'll have to initiate the conversation.

 

i just WISH i had a little idea of how he is feeling and what he is thinking about. foolishly, i thought after 38 days of no contact i'd be feeling significantly better, but the curiosity is really starting to eat me up. i won't give in though. i have come too far to lose all this progress!

[js0905]

Hi Violet,

 

You are doing really well darling = )

Hang in there please, even if it still sucks you don't want to go backwards because that sucks more...

 

Trust me I been at day 28 then answered his text from day 23 which meant nothing btw.

So then made it to day 9 texted him, he texted bck but again it meant nothing.

Then got to day 10 he txtd supposedly wanted to see me & talk...blah,blah, blah.

 

The day came around (in between there were 3 days he didn't contact me btw) and then he cncd because he was sick...

Chose to believe he was sick & txtd him the nxt day to tell him I was thinking of him & hoped he felt better. He txtd back he was starting to feel a little better (meant nothing).

 

That was last Wed and I figured once he felt better he would txt me and we would reschedule our meet. Waited 3 days and contacted him again to see how he was feeling, said better and that he missed me. I'm sure it still means nothing so I'm back at day 1.....

 

Where I'm going with this is and it is probably not what you want to hear but maybe he does care for you enough to let you go.

 

That is something important because when people go back and forth but just do it to keep you hanging. It is so much worst because they are treating you like an option and that uncertainty can drive you mad...

[vi0let]

Hello js0905,

 

thank you for your comments, i really appreciate them. i definitely have no intentions of going backwards, no matter how bad it feels. you're right, maybe he does love me enough to let me go. especially how during the break up, i basically told him off for leading me on towards the end of the relationship.

 

i know that if he contacted me, it would only lead to false hope on my part, so i guess i should be glad that he hasn't said anything to me. but at the same time it hurts because it feels like he has forgotten that i exist and that i didn't make an impact on his life whatsoever, which blows. it just hurts with each passing day that i may never hear from him, especially how i know that i definitely cannot be friends with him.

 

i am sorry to hear about your story because you seem like a genuinely lovely person who cares for others and it sucks that someone takes advantage of that kindness. trust me i can relate to that greatly. i just hope this process gets easier soon for the both of us. i am especially tired of feeling like i am in purgatory.

[Jackiedandy]

My first post here.

 

In day 13 of no contact. The pain I felt one week ago is much less now.

 

My thoughts are changing from "I want it all back" to "I appreciate what I had".

 

When I see my ex again, I hope we feel different. I hope we feel better.

[simplexity]

Day 15 of NC, i miss the HIM i thought he was and I miss us .. but fact of the matter is He already is a stranger I hardly know.. Letting him go is the only best option for the both of us.. it will get better

[kinders]

Day 2

 

Today is the morning of day 3, but I'll tell you about day 2 as I had no desire to talk about it yesterday.

 

Day 2 was worse than day 1. I had a horrible anxiety attack, couldn't breathe and really scared myself. I asked my sister for my medication but she got angry and said I was stronger than this. She is currently keeping my meds as I tried to O.D last week..The refusal of my meds made me more anxious, I thought I was going to die. Eventually she gave in and gave me one.

 

Later me and my sister had an argument about the meds and her wedding. I said to her I don't know if I can make it through the day without being a blubbering mess. She got angry with me. I needed someone to talk to that wasn't going to be angry with me so I called my best friend (unfortunately this is my exs sister). She came over and we sat and had a chat before heading out for dinner and then the cinema. I had a nice evening. It distracted me. When I got home I said hi to my sister and her partner and then quickly headed to bed. I went out like a light but woke up at 4am but soon went back to sleep until 8.

 

Today I woke up and noticed he had posted a lyric from a sad song about being alone on his facebook. Obvious breadcrumbs...

 

Anywho, dunno what today will involve as I have no plans what so ever and everyone else is at work.

 

Might just sleep all day. x,x

[Hazyillusions]

NC 101 days

 

Every few days I get this mad compulsion to email him. But so far I'm so happy I haven't made the first move! I know I can be passed this. I'm strong and things WILL get better!!

[hgill]

TIME: 9:15

NO CONTACT HAS STARTED 16/09/13 !

I dont wanna cling onto him, he will realise what hes missing soon very soon. Thanks alot! ill be posting, i have a question up if you want to know the whole story, its under breaking up. YAY! him.

[allrighty128]

Day 8 of NC

 

Missing her a lot a lot, I hope she can be just beside me....

[simplexity]

I met a couple of people who have shown their interest in pursuing me and even managed to entertain some of them for a friendly lunch or dinner.

While I sure like the attention and never did once doubted myself in this aspect, I still can't help and think about how he used to pursue me and how I thought it was rather more sweet if it was him I am with at that moment of trying to entertain new people in my life. Siggh.. He was all what I ever wanted. I thought I had the perfect guy for me but it was all just in a dream ... I need to wake up from this nightmare .. he was not the same person that I thought he was.. and I'm grateful I found out about it before I even fallen more harder and not be able to get back up. I am proud that I walked away from him before he even fooled me more into making me believed he was the man I deserved.. NO .. he isn't ..

[S.Ken]

I believe this is Day 7 of NC since I ignored her last self-absorbed text message about her wearing bright "happy" colors.

 

Obviously some days are worse than others. I almost had a setback on facebook yesterday, but quickly came back to my senses.

[hgill]

So this is the first day, he seems so happy, and is talking to my friends, but they are all just friends since grade 9, while ago. I miss himmmmm but I won't cry and I won't contact him

[MadineAgain]

682 DAYS NO CONTACT

 

It has been a while, but for some reason I felt like returning to these boards today. I cannot even remember the password to my old account.

 

November 5th 2011 was the last time I saw her. The ex that made me register here, that made me feel the worst I have ever felt for weeks, months, almost even years. You can read most of my stupid story here: enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=386860 I thought I had lost my soul mate, the one and only girl for me and I thought all that was left for me and my future was a loveless life. Until November 10th 2012. When I met a girl. A girl who changed my perspective on everything that had happened to me over the years that had passed. Last time I was here all I wanted was my ex back. Now she is just a chapter in a book collecting dust in my book rack.

 

I know all of your pain. It is going to pass. You will get through.

[goingawol]

I'm back at day 1 of NC - stupidly sent her a card on her Birthday...

 

Last time I got to Day 22, that is now my target to exceed! Wish me luck!

[js0905]

Thank you for sharing that...it gives me hope =)

 

I'm back at day 1 since I replied to his "Hi honey!!" text which of course really led to nothing....

Trying to entertain myself with others who so far have not lived up to him.

[S.Ken]

So this is the first day, he seems so happy, and is talking to my friends, but they are all just friends since grade 9, while ago. I miss himmmmm but I won't cry and I won't contact him

 

Ah, go ahead and cry. It won't do you any good keeping that crap bottled up inside.

 

Just don't tell the ex or anyone he knows about it.

[sniperz]

I went until Day 9 or 10 and stopped using NC rule but will begin with it again. Healing is important. Even if your ex or girlfriend gives up easily, you should not. Try that maybe it's the true love you wanted.

[Ammieg]

Day 11 of no contact

 

after about 5 or 6 times of breaking up, and getting back together, I'm taking this seriously now. This year has been misery, and I deserve better and need to move on. Plus, I suspect he has now met someone else ;-( But probably for the best as it will stop him returning again.

 

I've broken no contact the last 2 times when I miss him and get very upset. I refuse to do that again.

[simplexity]

DAY 19 -- miss reading a message from him that he sends daily just to check up on me ... and miss being able to talk to someone that openly knowing that you won't be judged no matter how crazy the ideas/thoughts you have.. oh well, does he miss me too?? Ok shrugging this thought.. better clean my room now

[goingawol]

Day 2 - Worked from home today and also saw my counsellor which was good. She helped me to look at the overall picture.

Have to concentrate on the negatives and take off the rose tinted glasses....

[hgill]

Guys help me. I really wanna talk to him but when I see him around school he is happy. I know he remembers me, he looks into my eyes for a few seconds but acts like he doesn't care that I'm around. I'm not gunna annoy him, it's why he was pushed farther away when we broke up. When he's all alone at night, that's when he'll remember me. day 3!

[vi0let]

Day 42

 

i'm sick to death of missing him constantly all the time. the angst is killing me from the inside out, especially how he hasn't even 'checked up' on me like so many other people's ex's have. i would love to have the satisfaction of ignoring a text from him, but i'm trying to put it into perspective here and realise that it is probably best that i don't hear from him at all.

 

this is really, really tough. at the very least, i hope he is missing me a little in return.

[simplexity]

It's now day 20--- past my bedtime and I suddenly thought of reading your previous threads here at ENA about me and your feelings for me (those times I didn't knew that you actually were writing here and told me like a year after ) sigggh I wish it isn's complicated as it is now.. I miss the old you that were with me , I wish that you still feel the same way about me.. I just miss you -- the you that I fell for >

[Ammieg]

Day 13.

 

I'm feeling OK. Proud of myself for getting this far, and not in the slightest tempted to break it. Going out to dinner tonight, will be sure to order something lovely to treat myself!

[kinders]

Day 1 (Again) euggh...

I saw him yesterday. It was nice. We watched our favourite tv show and talked about our weeks and had a good time. He took me shopping for food too. Then we parted. No physical contact. No tears. Just a bye...

 

Now im back here. Back at the start of NC.

 

Today was ok. I went out with my with my cousin who I haven't seen in a while. She is single and its nice to have another single person to speak too! All my friends and family seem to have partners.

 

Then I had a nice quiet night in.

 

Starting to feel a bit down about having to live with my sister. I love her but she is getting married soon and I don't want to be in a martial home with them two. I feel like such a dead weight. A little black cloud floating around making everyone miserable.

 

I want my own place, but I can't afford it. Blah...

 

Lets see how I feel tomorrow....