THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[Covergirl9]

Im very hurt and love my ex so much but this is what I gotta do for me hopefully I will have a good outcome. This will be so hard , but............Day1!!!!

[Nappyloxs]

Day 22

 

Really rough day. Really missed her so much today. I can't exactly explain why, but I sure did miss her. No crying. Just looking at some old pics of her. Oh well, I know she has moved on and is never coming back. Every time phone rang, I wanted to believe it was her calling. But it will never happen again.

 

On the bright side, I did get a call about a job offer. This should be great news, but I am waiting for the formal offer before I celebrate.

[aftermath1]

I miss her so much, I can't believe what an * * * * * * * I was, It is only when I stepped back from the situation I could see my destructive pattersn.

 

I only hope that one day she can forgive me and hopefully she at least still cares about me. That's what crushes me the most the fact that she might not even care about me. People come in and out of your life, I am sick of letting people leave my life. I guess I need to make more of an attempt to keep the people who are important in my life. I feel like I have learned so much in the past few months, but it might be a few months too late.

 

Recently I have been doing a lot of praying. I have never been very spiritual, but right now I feel that it can't hurt.

[tujna]

Just broke NC. I had to make sure he truly doesn't want it. Maybe he was just busy or not feeling like going out but this is enough for now to give me incentive not to contact him soon, until he decides to contact, if ever. Miss him. So hard. Hardly ever fought for someone that much! Day 1.

[Starrgrl]

Day 34 going on 35 really soon

 

Feel crap.

It's my birthday tomorrow.

 

 

Doubt he even remembers or knows (yeah, sad huh? ) -_-.

 

I too am praying alot these days (daily actually... At least once a day. I've gone so spiritual and I'm liking it really)

 

God please continue giving me the strength to go on.

Great. Now have to force a smile for tomorrow. Yay, I'm so looking forward to that.

 

Sigh.

[SA2000]

Day 2

 

I woke up disgusted with her. I thought she was stronger, smarter, classier, and had an ounce of integrity. I was wrong. She has become everything she swore she wasn't. It's so unattractive that I can't believe I spent 5 years with her and a year trying to get things back. You can't change someone back. Once a good girl's gone bad, she's gone forever.

[VinnieMarlboro]

My B/day too Starrgrl

 

Got the Happy B/day txt - sent 1 back saying -Ta

 

Broke my NC on tues and she said she would call - I said nope u can text tho.

 

Shouldnt even of replied - would of been ok if the sentiment was there, but really dont think it was.

 

You have a Happy B/day - that is said with sentiment and feeling.

 

Hold your head up and stay strong.

[VinnieMarlboro]

Been thinking lately that I should turn the tables and dump her.

Give her what for and say it like it is.

 

Any thoughts?

[Griffey]

What did she sway in her bday text to you and how did you respond??

 

 

Anyway - day 12 for me, feeling decent, but miss her friendship

[Nappyloxs]

Start of Day 23. and I am already on ENA this morning. I will be okay today. I have been asking myself since yesterday what did I really love about her? I still can't answer it. I know I loved her, but don't know why. The things I use to love became all negatives. I don't understand how and why I still love her when I can't even answer why.

 

I have been thinking of breaking NC by just simply saying hello. But I refuse to. I broke NC a million times before I am not doing it again. I know she wants to be single just by the way the relationship was at the end. I refuse break NC. It makes me a bit stronger every time I get the urge, but don't break it.

[deecbee]

Hey guys,

 

congrats to all of you who have made progress and begun to heal. Before I officially re-start Day 1, just wanted to give you a word of caution: be careful, even after 5, 6, 7 months. It may feel like you've been healed, but those old feelings and that hurt can come back just as strong. We broke up at the end of February, and I managed to make it through the summer and get over the first hump of getting over him. I noticed that he was reading and commenting on my blog daily (anonymously) and so I ended up trying to reconnect with him over the weekend. He rejected my friendship because he was in another relationship, and he was so cold and uncaring about it.

 

Now, 6 months after the initial breakup, it feels like day 2 all over again. All of that progress wiped out simply because I misinterpreted his reading my blog daily, and I had a few too many glasses of wine. It was not worth my dignity- and all it did was hurt me and give his ego a massage. The lesson in all this is—STAY VIGILANT. 6 months sounds like a long time, and it is, but if you aren’t 1000% sure that you are over your ex, do not even entertain the idea of re-entering their lives. In fact, if you are still THINKING about your ex six months later, that is a sure sign that you are not ready to start communication with them.

[deecbee]

Day 1- again (6 months after the initial breakup)

 

My problem isn’t so much contacting him directly, but checking up on him in other ways… facebook, blog stats, checking my email, thinking about him consistently. I completely embarrassed myself this past weekend and hit a low point when I made a pass at him and he swiftly rejected me after I had put my heart out on the table. It is time to get back some self-respect, and chasing this a*hole has only bruised my spirit. I am imposing a 6 month ban on myself for the following:

 

Checking the email that I write to him from- I wrote him a hurt, scathing letter last night and I know that if I get a response from him, it will only hurt me to read it. I have other email accounts that I can use for work- I will NOT check this email account for 6 months because I do not want to see his response (or lack of response). I will be hurt by his reply and will only continue emailing him.

 

Checking my blog statistics- that is what got me into trouble in the first place. Seeing his IP address on my blog once, twice a day and leaving comments. It got to the point where I would feel upset if he hadn’t checked it for a whole weekend and made me jealous about his new relationship. I even started writing on certain subject matter knowing he would read it, and as a writer that is a NO-NO. It has affected my work. No checking blog traffic for 3 MONTHS. After that, I will only check it once a week.

 

Facebook- I will not check his or his girlfriend’s Facebook for 6 months. I do not want to see his or his girlfriend’s pictures.

 

Texts- NO texts, and I will not respond to his on the slim chance that he does text me.

 

So here we go-- DAY 1.

[deecbee]

And one more thing- NO MORE checking his horoscope! I don't even believe in daily horoscopes, but lately I've been finding myself checking his. I don't know why, I suppose it is a way to make sense of a situation I do not understand, but it is so silly!

[Nappyloxs]

I have to vent a little. So I have had this thought that I have not allowed really to enter my mind.

 

My ex cheated on me.

 

The last week together, I had to go out of town from Thursday to Sat. On Tuesday and Wednesday, she made the excuse she was hanging out with her friend. (FYI, friend is 40 and cheats on her husband of 20 years). I remember trying to call ex. and she never answered. Would a gf/bf want to spend time with the other before they were going out of town, even if it was for a few days?

 

She had also started recently go to two different outdoor workout groups where I know for a fact that she was checking out the guys. Just slowly putting things together, I really think now that she cheated on me that last week.

[oceanblue535]

Today is awful. Last night, I told God I would just relinquish control and let whatever was supposed to happen to happen. I also asked for guidance. What happened? A terrible nightmare and a bad feeling all day. Looks like I'm going to drink myself into a stupor tonight with my friends at a football game. Maybe I'll meet someone? ha...

[deecbee]

Careful, ocean, especially if you're the drunk texting type like I am! Anytime I drink when I'm thinking about him or feeling sorry for myself, I can't control it. Leave your phone at home or have a friend hold it. Trust me on this!!

[Rotxsen]

Yeah Bite ma'bruv!

Hope all is good in the world of banking!

 

Amen to that! And time well spent too!

TC

TS

 

Well guys sorry for the late reply busy busy ! I start college soon and I got me a nice job and a car ! =D well yes I been thinking about that well I have a few facts and two friends of mines they being like ying and yang about it.

 

one of the things she posts stuff about missing someone who knows maybe it's you like this one "Not because I don't talk to you, doesn't mean I don't miss you" or the one that now the perfect bf that she left me for they broke up two months ago and I hear she puts a lot of weird stuff like come on hurry up come back (cause apparently he was just a rebound to get over me) etc so I'm like ehh I don't know and my friend goes well remember this nes if you truly love her doesn't matter if she went with him what matters she's gonna be with you now and remember you weren't exactly a gentleman now you are and I can see you have grown, and my other friend which is female goes no why would you do that you would only hurt yourself remember what god has gave you and what he has taken from you it's because of a reason etc, so I'm stuck on this dilemma

 

Should I go back and try to grab what I can from the past, Or let it go completely I mean I feel like this whole chapter it's about to close I either take whatever I can from it and move to the next one or close it forever.

[TSandullo]

The chapter closes forever only when either one of you are dead. Do as you feel and think you must. All the best in your decision.

 

TS

[Starrgrl]

Day 35

 

I'm on a roll.

 

One day at a time. I can do it!

I know I can.

[Rotxsen]

The chapter closes forever only when either one of you are dead. Do as you feel and think you must. All the best in your decision.

 

TS

 

I mean when I tried talking to her the other day I was like shaking, my heart was beating faster I was nervous I was like I can't think straight.

[bitebenot]

Thats what i call playing the " russian roulette " !

My friend u got balls. Whatever you do, stay strong.

[deecbee]

Bitebenot! I remember you. How are you? What's new? (It has been since January, I think)

[Nappyloxs]

Day 23 over. One more week to 30 days!!!!!!!! I have never gone 30 days without trying to initiate contact. I know its a week away and to take it one day at a time, but still just knowing I have come this far feels great.

[Animelover6764]

Thats what i call playing the " russian roulette " !

My friend u got balls. Whatever you do, stay strong.

 

 

long time I saw you man

[markd321]

Day 8

 

This is tough - yesterday was fine, today awful.

I'm sat at work, I've typed out a short note just saying "Hi, hope you're ok"

 

I'm staring at it wanting to hit send. I want her to know I'm thinking about her so much............