bitebenot Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Oh yeah, just saw a pic of the other guy nailing my ex (yes, have been multiple... that's the reward you get for 14 years without so much as flirting with a girl). I couldn't believe it, but he was actually worse than the first guy. F***ing disgusting loser fat slobs. I think she may have actually gone crazy. Stop getting information on her,ur just torturing yourself ! Me, im not even trying to get anything from her new relationship ! The more you know the more you will suffer ! Just read her emails if u want(but dont answer). Remove her from FB and others.Tell u what,on MYSPACE you can have a TRACKER...maybe she knows everytime you take a look !!!!!!!!! The longer you will do this the longer you will be agonizing ! And dumpers do go crazy when they split ! Me,i just became a ghost..the less they know about you the more they wonder what ur doing ! This is now about you and not her.Shes happy for now,do the same dammit ! She doesnt f*cking care,why should you ? Hate her,it works for me lol ! Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Day 4 Round 4 Well I actually had to sit back and think about what day I was on, so thats a good start. Still think off u a fair bit, but I have another that I am thinking about too. Hopefully in time he can fill my head and kick u out Thats the spirit ! Keep on going,you will do great and u will be free of all the negative feelings ! But go slowly so the new one wont get hurt like u did ! Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Did you know, 75% of dumpers are women ! And less then 10% of the dumpers (men included) goes back to their ex ! And when(if) they decide to come back, its between 3 to 6 months... and as far as 2 years ! 3 to 6 months if u dont communicate at all ! The more you chase them, the longer it takes ! If the ex can have you anytime (they know it), ur in deep trouble ! So everything is against the dumpee ! Waiting for them is like hoping to win the lottery ! IGNORE THEM, AT ALL COST ! So, time to heal and be prepared to find another lover ! If the ex knows about the new one in ur life, she/he will think a lot harder ! Some of them even loses their mind when that happens ! Weird but true ! HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL Link to comment
Tired Tiger Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Did you know, 75% of dumpers are women ! And less then 10% of the dumpers (men included) goes back to their ex ! And when(if) they decide to come back, its between 3 to 6 months... and as far as 2 years ! 3 to 6 months if u dont communicate at all ! The more you chase them, the longer it takes ! If the ex can have you anytime (they know it), ur in deep trouble ! So everything is against the dumpee ! Waiting for them is like hoping to win the lottery ! Can you cite a reference for these "statistics"? Link to comment
anon12 Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Day 2, NC worked once, Im hoping it works in the same way Take 2 with the same person. I hope it works twice ! Link to comment
peanutbutterandjelly Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Can you cite a reference for these "statistics"? yeah, seriously. Link to comment
SunniDee Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Even though it started out super hard, he stalked me, tried to harass me into contact, all that good stuff, I have been happily NC now since July 17th of last year. You can do it guys. Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Can you cite a reference for these "statistics"? You can find them in many reports,also on ENA,Reverse Psychology and Rebound Relationships.I read many articles and they all mention the same %. Note that rebounds dont work 95% of the time.Those references are found everywhere on the net.Rebounds dont work most of the time but it doesnt mean they come back after such a failure ! Imho,no more then 5% do go back to their ex's ! If someone plays it well, he/she might have a better chance ! Sorry but its reality ! Some do want to come back but the dumpee (some) rejects them after a while ! Some will tell you the chances of them coming back are good but its bull sh1t ! I read many forums including ENA,out of 100,i saw only 3 who had success ! Yes they might call you and say they miss you but it doesnt go any further !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stinks huh ? Link to comment
CuZiNeeDYoU Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 You can find them in many reports,also on ENA,Reverse Psychology and Rebound relationships.I read many articles and they all mention the same %. Also the book,Magic of Making Up.Note that rebounds dont work 95% of the time.Those references are found everywhere on the net.Rebounds dont work most of the time but doesnt mean they come back after such a failure ! Imho,no more then 5% do go back to their ex's ! If someone plays it well, he/she might have a better chance ! That book has got to be the worse piece of crap ever written, anyway i dont think you can put numbers on breakups. There are just too many factors involved. Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Thats why i removed that mention,i agree.Still doesnt change the fact that only 5% do come back ! Find any better and let me know ! Thats why NC is the best way to go ! Anything else wont have any effect ! The ones who had success (that i saw) did use the NC !!! Others failed ! Sometimes LC does work but it depends of the relationship before the split. Also taking the calls to fast is very bad.They have to chase you or ur done ! Link to comment
CuZiNeeDYoU Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Again, you cant put a number like 5% out there because its not a science and there are no such studies, ltr are more likely to reconcile then short relationships, you also have to take into account the reasons for leaving, i mean if i look at the relationships that have happened in my entourage the rate looks more like 50% but that doesnt make it a fact. Link to comment
Tired Tiger Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 You can find them in many reports,also on ENA,Reverse Psychology and Rebound Relationships.I read many articles and they all mention the same %. Note that rebounds dont work 95% of the time.Those references are found everywhere on the net.Rebounds dont work most of the time but it doesnt mean they come back after such a failure ! Imho,no more then 5% do go back to their ex's ! If someone plays it well, he/she might have a better chance ! Sorry but its reality ! Some do want to come back but the dumpee (some) rejects them after a while ! Some will tell you the chances of them coming back are good but its bull sh1t ! I read many forums including ENA,out of 100,i saw only 3 who had success ! Yes they might call you and say they miss you but it doesnt go any further !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stinks huh ? bitebenot, While I recognize your good intentions and admire your enthusiasm, I cringe at this use of 'statistics' (lack of reference cite not withstanding), as if any such numbers would imply anything to all the different situations anyway. As one of the "lottery winners", I can assure you that getting back together has absolutely nothing to do with luck, nor do any hypothetical stats reflecting what happened to other people. 'NC' is a valid and even necessary approach for many situations after a breakup, and I would go so far as to suggest this thread be stickied... in the Healing forum. In this forum? I believe NC to be but one of many concepts to be used in specific situations, but absolutely not as the exclusive and mandatory strategy for reconciliation. But, I digress. No offense to those in NC. I've been there and empathize. Link to comment
CuZiNeeDYoU Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 So how do you go about reconciling tiger? Link to comment
mark501 Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 This is day 19 for me. It is easier when you stay away. We can go through the images of just when they will get back in contact again but it's best just left in the past. Link to comment
anon12 Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Day 3, really starting to doubt weather its going to work again in the same way Link to comment
anon12 Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 Day 1, again. I broke it after she compared me to her new boyfriend. Apparently, being slightly clingy, is just as bad as him cheating on her, treating her like crap.... i dont think so. I told her the new her isnt the person i fell in love with, and ill only be able to forgive her if she ever changes back.. Probably a bad move, but tbh, i dont want to be with the new her. NC again, hopefully she changes. I think its a waiting game for me really Link to comment
nauum Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 We just broke recently after breaking a year prior...my question is that everyone says go NC but then how do you reconcile if you're going NC...how would they reach you? Wouldn't they just give up and move on? Link to comment
anon12 Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 We just broke recently after breaking a year prior...my question is that everyone says go NC but then how do you reconcile if you're going NC...how would they reach you? Wouldn't they just give up and move on? It worked with me once, i let her back in too quickly, and her heads messed up. They have your number, email if they want to contact you. The whole reason of NC isnt just to get them back, its easier for you to get over them. people cant miss you if you dont go, so going NC usually means they start to miss what they had, it took a month for me the first time. Im praying it works again, ill handle it better Link to comment
bish0p2004 Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 We just broke recently after breaking a year prior...my question is that everyone says go NC but then how do you reconcile if you're going NC...how would they reach you? Wouldn't they just give up and move on? NC is mainly for you to heal, the possibility of the ex coming back is a potential side effect. However, once you are in a better emotional state (from being in NC and healing), you can attempt to go into LC with your ex. Link to comment
nauum Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 Anon12..good advice..you say they have your number..but remember you're not picking it up? Link to comment
anon12 Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 Anon12..good advice..you say they have your number..but remember you're not picking it up? no, but you can read text messages, you dont have to respond though. I didnt delete my ex from facebook. Shes blabbing to the world about how much she loves this new guy, even though the whole town hates his guts, and new rumours come out every week about what hes upto when shes not around. Shes making herself look like a fool, the first time it worked, she didnt really try and talk to me to begin with, but after about 2 weeks, every day she would send me a message, asking about something irrelivent, then join numerous facebook groups, I love my bf, etc etc, and post new status's whenever i didnt respond. I know most people say delete all means, but when she did all that stuff, it made me feel better, and after about a month she told me to meet up, and how she felt etc etc. Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 day 6...almost day 7..(other than one brief text message that im not counting.) he sucks. Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 NC is about SELF RESPECT ! When someone dumps you, why in hell someone would want to stick around and finding out what the ex is doing or saying ? Who in his right mind wants to become a masochist ? Hey, if they dumped you its because they DONT want you anymore ! Who is willing to become the fish at the end of a fishing line ? I see a lot here that are suck*ers to their ex because they are so needy.I was dumped 3 months ago,i will surely not communicate with her ever ! Its up to the DUMPER to initiate contact ! If you call first it might be a very bad timing and you will be back to square one and the ex will know that he/she can have you anytime ! Is that good ? It will push them even further away ! They have to know they have lost you and getting you back wont be easy ! No way will my ex have that much control over me,im worth a lot more.Being in NC gives me control over my life even if my other half is no longer with me !They dont care anymore,why should we ? If she decides to come back,she will have to imitate a snake by crawling back. That way at least you can be shure they regret their decision and they still have love for you.Have some pride and ignore them TOTALLY,erase them from all those messengers on the net ! Let them reach you only by phone. Dont take the calls,just listen to the messages.If its not about reconciliation,just ignore it.Make them earn your trust again,AMEN ! Link to comment
1guygirl Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 I like this...ALOT!! Day errrm...11 had some really odd dreams...loads of synchronicities, pulled some cards...just mad... get the feeling hes wanting me to conctact im holding strong cos nc is for me not him i know we would never work, in my heart deep down, but just still have that feelings for him that it would/could...and that horrible painful pang... just gunna stick in there Link to comment
bitebenot Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 i like this...alot!! day errrm...11 had some really odd dreams...loads of synchronicities, pulled some cards...just mad... Get the feeling hes wanting me to conctact im holding strong cos nc is for me not him i know we would never work, in my heart deep down, but just still have that feelings for him that it would/could...and that horrible painful pang... Just gunna stick in there ignore him,let him beg ! When he does,you will be in total control ! Then you decide what you want and how ! Link to comment
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