Risking STD’s for love or sex

[JadedStar]

You also have herpes, how do you like walking around when you have a cold sore with people thinking your dirty or bad? It isn't fun. And you don't deserve it. And no one else who has an STD deserves it.

 

Yes it is good that we understand it, get check ups and take care of ourselves it always is. But fear doesn't help with that. It makes people afraid to tell the partners afraid to get checked out. The stigma is awful, as someone who has lived with it I would think you would agree with me.

 

What if your partner had said he didn’t want to be with you because he might get HSV from you?

 

No offense Rosephase, but most people who have an STD aren't going around advertising it so they are not getting slammed by the general public. You choose to have an open relationship with varied partners, thus your business gets out on the street more. These are the repercussions I spoke of when we have sex unprotected or even protected with multiple partners.

 

When I go to a restaruant i do not know which patrons have an STD, so they are not the victim of my mindset. The only victims of my mindset would be a potential lover. And anyone I have ever slept with knows that protection for me is serious business.

 

You are an anonymous person on the internet, so my thoughts on STD's should not move you much or affect your life in anyway. If you met me on the street and chose to tell me you have an STD, that would kind of be your bad for sharing it. It wouldn't be my business. The only people who have a need to know are your partners, and yes, they have every right to be leary of it if they are putting themselves in harms way and risking it. It is what it is. Every person has the right to say no to sex. You almost make me think that you are angry that some people would not sleep with you because you have an STD. Don't they have the right to know and make the choice?

[Mythical_Suicide]

I heard you could only get crabs, but I'm still paranoid. I'm a germ a phobe. LOL. I should be wearing gloves, you don't know where peoples hands have been!

 

 

Why is anything going to go from a warm host body to a cold toilet seat. Even if it does, most stds die within seconds or a few minutes once exposed to air.

[Snoopy24]

Because it is a big deal.

I have had HPV, and while it is one of the most common STDs passed around it is a big deal even though most people would see the numbers and be like "oh it's not big deal". If it's something you can die from or be messed up the rest of your life because you have, it is a big deal.

 

You can't get rid of HPV. It can lay dormant in your system for 50 years, but you always have it.

[Mythical_Suicide]

There has never been a proved case where someone got HSV from an object. Cups, sex toys, whatever. People get HSV from skin to skin contact.

 

You can get herpes from those things listed if they are used immediately after.

[Mythical_Suicide]

You can't get rid of HPV. It can lay dormant in your system for 50 years, but you always have it.

 

Yes, Your body/immune system can rid itself of the virus.

[lady00]

I heard you could only get crabs, but I'm still paranoid. I'm a germ a phobe. LOL. I should be wearing gloves, you don't know where peoples hands have been!

 

I don't sit on public toilet seats...just feel icky doing that...but I know it's not really going to give me an STI, although as you say, maybe you could get crabs. Yuck. Anyway, that I understand...I always hover.

[Sparkly Eyes]

ok so you think if you were single you should tell your dates you have HSV1 before you kiss them even if an outbreak is not present?

[Mythical_Suicide]

ok so you think if you were single you should tell your dates you have HSV1 before you kiss them even if an outbreak is not present?

 

I would. But that is just me. Because even if you aren't having an actual outbreak the virus can be spread.

[Sparkly Eyes]

You can't get rid of HPV. It can lay dormant in your system for 50 years, but you always have it.

 

in many cases HPV goes away itself. that is herpes you are talking about!!

[doyathink]

I think the REAL problem is ppl like you who aren't taking this serious enough! Thats why it's spread like wild fires.

[rosephase]

You know HSV1 can be caught genitally, right? While giving oral sex? It is the SAME thing as HSV2 in fact a lot of people have 2 and think they have 1 because they have it on there mouth, it doesn't work that way. Have you ever had a blot test? They have only really been able to test for what kind you have in the past 3-5 years. If you haven't got one you might very well have two on your mouth.

 

And your right, it is not my place, and I'm not trying to say its right or wrong for anyone. I just think it is important for people who are thinking about these things to at least hear some other opinions.

 

I think it's important.

[Mythical_Suicide]

I'm not sitting here saying every person that has an STD is a dirty person or is nasty. Because that is far from the truth. However I choose not to expose myself to diseases. I caught HPV and went through far too much to even risk going through again so I will never again put myself in that position. Thankfully my fiance was a virgin and I didn't have to worry about those types of things. It doesn't make me a bad person but I have too much to live for to just have casual sex and not worry about STDs.

[Smyles]

I would not risk any kind of STDs for love, but I certainly would not discount him if he is diseased. I would take the proper protocols to keep our relationship safe and healthy.

 

This is how STDs are spread, because people think they love each other so the need to have barrier sex is obsolete. If your partner loves you, he would advise you in all respect to keep yourself safe and healthy, as you should yourself.

[redhearts]

Herpes, the gift that keeps on giving.

[Mythical_Suicide]

You know HSV1 can be caught genitally, right? While giving oral sex? It is the SAME thing as HSV2 in fact a lot of people have 2 and think they have 1 because they have it on there mouth, it doesn't work that way. Have you ever had a blot test? They have only really been able to test for what kind you have in the past 3-5 years. If you haven't got one you might very well have two on your mouth.

 

And your right, it is not my place, and I'm not trying to say its right or wrong for anyone. I just think it is important for people who are thinking about these things to at least hear some other opinions.

 

I think it's important.

 

I honestly think that you are trying to make yourself feel better about things by trying to make others feel the same way you are. It seems you are so focused on getting people to be ok with STDs simply for the fact that you engage in risky activity so you want to make it all "ok". It will never be ok.

 

Oh, and btw, yes, I do know it's HSV1 I have... HSV1 and HSV2 are different viruses.. If you knew so much, you would know that already.

[Sparkly Eyes]

I honestly think that you are trying to make yourself feel better about things by trying to make others feel the same way you are. It seems you are so focused on getting people to be ok with STDs simply for the fact that you engage in risky activity so you want to make it all "ok". It will never be ok.

 

Oh, and btw, yes, I do know it's HSV1 I have... HSV1 and HSV2 are different viruses.. If you knew so much, you would know that already.

 

she knows that! she said that you should have been tested in last 3-5 years to be sure what kinda herpes you have. because distunguishing between them through blood test is a new thing

[redhearts]

I honestly think that you are trying to make yourself feel better about things by trying to make others feel the same way you are. It seems you are so focused on getting people to be ok with STDs simply for the fact that you engage in risky activity so you want to make it all "ok". It will never be ok.

 

Oh, and btw, yes, I do know it's HSV1 I have... HSV1 and HSV2 are different viruses.. If you knew so much, you would know that already.

 

Her bf not only found her to be with, but another female who is in a relationship, keep on spreading. (If they all have sex, hmm)

[JadedStar]

I think the REAL problem is ppl like you who aren't taking this serious enough! Thats why it's spread like wild fires.

 

I have to say I agree. Rosephase, it is your casual approach to STD's that helping to cause these diseases to run rampant.

 

And being in an open relationship to boot is risky and irresponsible. Now realize this is only my opinion, but i have to say it because having one partner is bad enough when you have an STD but having multiple partners, and they have mutliple partners, and so on and so on the diseases are getting out there at an alarmingly rapid rate. Now add to that misinformed young people who are not mature enough to always make the right decisions and you compound the problem even further.

 

Condoms are not nearly as effective as people think they are. Especially for herpes. Genital contact even without direct fluids spewing from one person to another can cause an outbreak. A condom is useless if a person has an open sore on a part of their genitals not covered by a condom.

 

 

I do not think you will see in your lifetime a world where no one gives a hoot if they contract an STD and just have unprotected sex at whim.

[Snoopy24]

Yes, Your body/immune system can rid itself of the virus.

 

Oh, sorry I wasn't aware of that. I know they have a vaccine now, but I thought once you had it, you always had it. My mistake!

[littlestar]

So before I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time he told me he had herpes. I was already in love with him and had sex with him that night, and we started having unprotected sex with him a few weeks later. Three years later he has had all of two outbreaks and never gave it to me (he has HSV2 and I got HSV1 from kissing a friend about a year ago) It never occurred to me that other people wouldn’t be with someone because of herpes, but I feel like I have seen people say that over and over again on this forum.

 

Would you do it, for the right person?

 

 

I have been in this situation before and i must say i made the decision not to be with this person or have sex with them for the simple reason they had Herpes.

I dont think my life is worth the suffering and having an STD not for love, not for sex.

[Sparkly Eyes]

Her bf not only found her to be with, but another female who is in a relationship, keep on spreading. (If they all have sex, hmm)

 

hey, you are not supposed to judge here!

[rosephase]

I honestly think that you are trying to make yourself feel better about things by trying to make others feel the same way you are. It seems you are so focused on getting people to be ok with STDs simply for the fact that you engage in risky activity so you want to make it all "ok". It will never be ok.

 

Oh, and btw, yes, I do know it's HSV1 I have... HSV1 and HSV2 are different viruses.. If you knew so much, you would know that already.

 

What test did you take to know that? If you know so much about it? When did you take it? There hasn't been a reliable test until recently.

 

I don't need to feel better, I feel fine about my status. What makes me sad is people who feel awful for the rest of there lives because they are living with an STD. And for someone who is living with an STD like you and me I would think it would be important to you to remind people that it isn't the end of the world and it doesn't make them a bad person.

 

All this stigma come from the fact that we are still living in basically a sex negative world I know that, but hell, if I can be one voice that says something different maybe it will cause a little less unneeded shame in someone’s life. And that is worth it to me.

[Mythical_Suicide]

Oh, sorry I wasn't aware of that. I know they have a vaccine now, but I thought once you had it, you always had it. My mistake!

 

 

Honest mistake Only reason I was aware is because like I said i've gone through quite a few treatments for the virus and doing tons of research.

There are quite a few cases where it lays dormant in the body and flares up later on but it most cases (depending on the strain..) the body's natural immune system will rid the virus.

[Smyles]

Originally Posted by Mythical_Suicide View Post

Yes, Your body/immune system can rid itself of the virus.

 

I think you\'re confusing HPV and HSV-2. Once you contracted HSV-2, you have it for life, it may only lay dormant in your system, but won\'t go away.

[redhearts]

hey, you are not supposed to judge here!

 

Not judging, it is a statement. Showing how carelessly some people just don't care.