shy guys: what attracts you?

[Gratsy]

What makes you want certain women? Be specific: what should I do to be attractive to men in general? I have a friend who is very smiley, sweet, and flirtacious and that works for her well...

[DaBladeRoden]

Well what do you have to start building off of?

[Dragunov-21]

TBH, I like girls who are a little coy, but flirty and still confident when it comes right down to it. Coyness is great, but scoial awkwardness (not that I can talk lol) or insecurity does the opposite for you.

 

I'd take a leaf out of your friend's book if you're worried about how you're coming accross.

 

Just out of interest, what makes you particularly inserested in shy guys?

[fivespot]

I'm a little shy at times...not really bad, though, but I certainly prefer a quiet night at home over a night of partying. I'm just that kind of guy. I can handle just about any social situation, but my ex was able to literally work a room...she could talk to anyone at anytime about anything, and people were ALWAYS willing to talk right back.

 

I can't do that...all too often, I feel like I'm bothering the person I strike up a conversation with. They start looking the other way or whatever...subtle cues that I can tell they aren't interested. So I mostly keep to myself with people I don't know.

 

But that's what REALLY attracted me to her. She was my complete opposite, but her personality won me over. She certainly wasn't the best looking girl in the world, she was a little overweight, had some major health issues. But she was warm and sweet and I could look past all of her imperfections. Her personality was amazing. And MANY people took note. Yeah, she'll never have a problem finding another boyfriend. And that's what really breaks my heart.

[whitetigerak]

I honestly don't think there's one exact formula.. I think it depends on the girl...

 

I was engaged a few years back.. and the girl was crazy into me... the night after we met.. she called me over 15 different times the next day alone.. and I was very into it.. I found it so flattering and attractive this girl was so crazy about me...

 

then the last girl I was seeing.. she was very elusive and would like avoid me for days at a time and always play very hard to get... when she called it was always like right before she went to bed so that we'd talk for like 5-10 minutes and then she'd be like 'i'm too tired I have to leave' and it drove me crazy in a good way trying to get this girls attention..

 

So I really think every girl has that 'spark' to them and you just need to find what 'personality' fits you and attracts guys to you and then stick with it!

[Crush85]

What makes you want certain women? Be specific: what should I do to be attractive to men in general? I have a friend who is very smiley, sweet, and flirtacious and that works for her well...

 

It helps to be down to earth. If you come on too strong, it might intimidate the guy a little bit. Just work towards breaking the ice and getting into his comfort zone, then you can work from there.

[shy2cool]

A girl that looks happy, smiles, but is a bit coy.

[civilservant]

Someone who has that allure of mystery, comes accross as confident but not aggressive, has a wicked sense of humor and came take a ribbing as well as give them. It's different for all of us though, obviously.

[DaBladeRoden]

Wear something that has a story behind it

[Carmine]

Someone who doesn't flaunt their social life - ie, always talking/texting on their phone, always talking about their friends, etc. Someone who can go an outing without having to hold several meaningless text conversations to show that they're in demand is attractive.

[Manco]

1.) Go to the gym. Men like fit women.

 

2.) When you talk to guys be friendly. If you are in a social setting and you like a guy, try to direct more of your attention to him. If there are a few guys you are talking to, but he gets most of your attention chances are he's going to hit on you. Personally, if I see a girl I like I hit on her anyways regardless of whether she shows interest or not. However, when it comes down to asking for a number then the girl which shows more signs will be the one I'll ask.

[bijoux27]

For some reason I don't usually attract guys who are very outgoing. I mainly get crushes from shy guys. I think it's because:

 

- I try to get them involved in the conversation

- I understand that they are shy and try to make them feel comfortable by giving them a friendly smile and try not to be intimidating

- I use a lot of humour

- I don't talk about other people too much at first...I talk about them, or ideas, or class, whatever...

- I try to make them say things out of their own initiative during the conversation, this makes them feel better about themselves in social situations

- I still give them physical space (not being too close, not giving too much eye contact so that they look away too much)

- Speak in a nice tone

[Manco]

For some reason I don't usually attract guys who are very outgoing. I mainly get crushes from shy guys. I think it's because:

 

- I try to get them involved in the conversation

- I understand that they are shy and try to make them feel comfortable by giving them a friendly smile and try not to be intimidating

- I use a lot of humour

- I don't talk about other people too much at first...I talk about them, or ideas, or class, whatever...

- I try to make them say things out of their own initiative during the conversation, this makes them feel better about themselves in social situations

- I still give them physical space (not being too close, not giving too much eye contact so that they look away too much)

- Speak in a nice tone

 

Thats what I mean. You make them feel comforatable by being friendly and outgoing yourself. It is so much easier to hit on a girl when she's friendly towards you. It's the confidence boost that some guys need and ineviatbly it will work in your favor because he may come out of his shell and flirt with you.

 

However, I can't say why you don't attract the outgoing guys. I think the reason you don't get a lot of outgoing guys is because you don't come off easy. You may come off as the relationship type of girl rather than the s l u t.

[bijoux27]

However, I can't say why you don't attract the outgoing guys. I think the reason you don't get a lot of outgoing guys is because you don't come off easy. You may come off as the relationship type of girl rather than the s l u t.

 

I think it's easier and funner to charm the guys who are a bit shy rather than the guys who are very outgoing

[Manco]

I think it's easier and funner to charm the guys who are a bit shy rather than the guys who are very outgoing

 

Shouldn't they charm you? I mean, all you gotta do is be nice and approachable, the rest is up to us

 

However, I should say that I wouldn't mind if a girl felt compelled to charm me. Nothing wrong with that at all!

[bijoux27]

Shouldn't they charm you? I mean, all you gotta do is be nice and approachable, the rest is up to us

 

However, I should say that I wouldn't mind if a girl felt compelled to charm me. Nothing wrong with that at all!

 

Oh yep it goes both ways. I also feel good knowing I can seduce him from my own behaviour rather than just for the fact that I am a girl and he should pursue me cause it makes him go doing doing doing.

[emeraldina]

Oh yep it goes both ways. I also feel good knowing I can seduce him from my own behaviour rather than just for the fact that I am a girl and he should pursue me cause it makes him go doing doing doing.

 

it's true .. it's so much more interesting when he reponds to the flirtations.. and I sens he likes it .. compared to those who are aggressive..

[Manco]

What do you mean by aggressive?

[emeraldina]

What do you mean by aggressive?

 

if I sense he's not really interested in the discussion but just eager to get the number and scream scored! if he comes off as too confident/cocky instead of gentle and humble .. u know those guys who seem to have a list of things to do with at the bottom -ask for number .. they come off aggressive and too mechanical .. to me anyway

[Stinkweed]

I don't really think I have a very specific type. However, I do have to say, I go to an engineering school, and every time I see an artist/bohemian type girl, it just stands out and kinda catches my attention. A well-dressed girl is always an attention grabber for me too. A girl looks so much better with a nice dress on. Unfortunately I don't see that all too often either, except those sorority girls who're going to a party who sometimes dress really well.

[Manco]

if I sense he's not really interested in the discussion but just eager to get the number and scream scored! if he comes off as too confident/cocky instead of gentle and humble .. u know those guys who seem to have a list of things to do with at the bottom -ask for number .. they come off aggressive and too mechanical .. to me anyway

 

Oh ok I see. But be careful with that. Some are just not very good/comforatable at talking to women, so their actions may seem mechanical because they are doing what they think is right.

 

I do agree that when you both flirt and respond to each others flirting it just feels natural and its a lot of fun.

[DaBladeRoden]

For some reason I don't usually attract guys who are very outgoing. I mainly get crushes from shy guys. I think it's because:

 

- I try to get them involved in the conversation

- I understand that they are shy and try to make them feel comfortable by giving them a friendly smile and try not to be intimidating

- I use a lot of humour

- I don't talk about other people too much at first...I talk about them, or ideas, or class, whatever...

- I try to make them say things out of their own initiative during the conversation, this makes them feel better about themselves in social situations

- I still give them physical space (not being too close, not giving too much eye contact so that they look away too much)

- Speak in a nice tone

 

That's my kind of girl. Also try to get them in more one on one conversations. In group convos, I'm naturally gonna become the third, fourth, fifth wheel respectively.

[schaser]

What makes you want certain women? Be specific: what should I do to be attractive to men in general? I have a friend who is very smiley, sweet, and flirtacious and that works for her well...

 

I love shy women! I dunno, I just find it cute when a woman is not overly loud and bubbly but is sweet and reserved.

 

The thing is that men like different things. I'd suggest that one should be themselves, and not change themselves in order to make themselves more attractive.

 

I also find that a good thing is to be proactive and seek out rather than being sought out, if that sense. i sometimes go to places were women of my type, so to speak, would most likely hang out. In general, in terms of personality, I like women who aren't shallow, have insight and wisdom and take interest in the world around them. I study at a university and sometimes i think of chatting with women in the library there, so I figure that they would be more akin to that type.