Mr SIBLEY Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 My brother died today, this is so hard for me. He was 18, that's not a life, it was meningitis (Bacterial). I got the call from my mum about 1 in the morning and she said that he was brain dead, the nurses believe that he died at about 10:00 am but had to do tests so couldn't pronounce it to 2:00 pm. My brother was a good one, he was such a great person, he cared for everyone and never let anything get to him. This will be so hard becuase he loves Christmas and this has always been his time of year. His girlfriend of about 2 years was so bad, we got to talk to him but he had already gone. I believe that I spoke to him for 30 minutes before he died. But I said my goodbyes and he's donating his Kidneys and his liver. After about 6 hours the nurse asked me if I was ready to see him go. I replied that if she asked me that in 60 years then I would have said yes. But he was only 18, he'll never get married, never have children. 3 days ago he was sitting on the end of my bed playing Video Games with me. We've been close for about 6 months and I'm so confused and don't know what to do. Link to comment
15 Storeys High Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 I'm so sorry. What an awful thing to happen. Meningitis is a terrible illness, works so fast and takes away everything. I wish I could say something to comfort you. How selfless of you all to donate his kidneys and liver - You're giving life to three people because of your generous act. That is a very special thing and you should be very proud of yourselves and of your brother. I hope in some way that can bring you a little comfort. Link to comment
RayKay Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 I did not know they would be able to donate organs if he had meningitis due to the risk. I am sorry about your brother; one of my cousins nearly died of meningitis (and has continuing health complications to this day) and my mother almost did too when she was a teenager. It really sucks when something like this - in the day of vaccinations and such - happens. All you can do is well, live day by day. Healing & grieving takes a lot of time. I hope you guys can also ensure to include his girlfriend in the whole process too - I have been in her same shoes before and a lot of his family seemed to forget he had been an important part of my life for five years too and shut me out....that only made it so much harder. Hugs, RK. Link to comment
Timebandit Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 My deepest condolence. This is such a heavy loss. Don't hesitate to reach out to other people. Apart from that I cannot say much but to wish you well. Take care of yourself. Link to comment
Mr SIBLEY Posted December 22, 2007 Author Share Posted December 22, 2007 They did tests to see whether he could donate and he could. The nurse said that the case he had couldn't be vaccinated against. I will include her and will make sure that nothing happens to her. It made it easier knowing that our devastation could potentially save another 3 families from it. We're so god damn proud of him. Link to comment
sandyv Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 Mr. Sibley, thats heartbreaking, I'm so sorry for your loss... xxx Sandy Link to comment
cristal Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 My condolences goes out to you and your family. This is hard at anytime, but even more so at this time of year. Your fond memories of him will stay with your forever. Please cherish them. Take care. Link to comment
Mr SIBLEY Posted December 22, 2007 Author Share Posted December 22, 2007 We talked about death a few times, but I never thought he would be the next member of my family to die. He has student loans that will need paying off, he has Christmas presents for everyone and everyone has presents for him. We oth often wondered what happened after death and now he knows, so in that respect I am jealous of him. It came suddenly and seeing him on that machine was horrifying, he wasn't doing anything, he was already dead. Just seemed to be keeping his organs alive. His heart was beating because of the machine, he looked so peaceful, they cleaned him up and combed his hair (he always had scruffy hair). I had my time alone and made my peace and now I'm wondering what does happen after death, because I feel pressured to believe that there is something, because if there isn't, where is he? Link to comment
sandyv Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 He is with you, I truly believe this. When my brother died, I know he said before taking his last breath.... "Sam I'll always be here, remember..." Link to comment
Portage Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 I'm truly sorry for your loss. Funny, i sit here thinking about relatives i'd rather not see this Christmas Eve, and you are going through such a terrible heartbreak. Link to comment
browneyedgirl36 Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 Mr. Sibley... I am so sorry for your loss. It is clear that you really loved your brother, and he knew that. That is a very, very important thing. It is essential that the people we love know that we love them, simply because we never know what will happen on any given day. It sounds like you had a great relationship with your brother; cherish the memories you have of him. And, in donating his organs, he will live on in that he will save other peoples' lives. What a wonderful thing to do! Link to comment
Entomon Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 My condolence goes to you and your family. To lose a loved one at such a time of the year can be heart-wrenching. I'm glad to hear that his remains can be donated to save others' lives -this is very unselfish of your family and the greatest gift to families with ill loved ones. May your brother rest in peace. Link to comment
mgirl Posted December 22, 2007 Share Posted December 22, 2007 I'm wondering what does happen after death, because I feel pressured to believe that there is something, because if there isn't, where is he? I wonder this too. I believe that love binds us to those who die. I would say right now, your brother is with you in some strange way. Link to comment
KG Posted December 23, 2007 Share Posted December 23, 2007 Mr. Sibley, I feel so bad for you and your family. Let me say that you will be in my thoughts tonight. As my wife, he will be there with you always in your heart. That does not go away. He will live in your thoughts, stories, and remembrances. Please feel free to PM me anytime, if i can help. Link to comment
Mr SIBLEY Posted December 23, 2007 Author Share Posted December 23, 2007 I think that we're going to try and get back to normal but this will undoubtedly be impossible. I don't know whether to wrap his presents or not. I hope that he is with me, parents have gone out and we're going to see about seeing him in the Hospital's Chapel of Rest later. Link to comment
Mr SIBLEY Posted December 23, 2007 Author Share Posted December 23, 2007 Sorry to double post. I found out his Kidneys went on to save a 5 Year old Girl and a 12 Year old boy. His liver saved a 44 year old women. They actuallt split his liver and it saved a baby aswell. (He's saved 4 lives now) I'm so proud, they all said how happy they were for his presents. Link to comment
rocio Posted December 23, 2007 Share Posted December 23, 2007 That's heartbreaking. How wonderful that 3 beautiful things could come out of your loss. We're here anytime you need to talk about this. Link to comment
Secret_Sunday_Lover Posted December 27, 2007 Share Posted December 27, 2007 I'm so sorry for your loss Mr Sibley. I'm a new member, but just reading your thread my heart swelled with sadness. I'm so sorry Link to comment
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