RileyRedleg05

Bravo! Good luck with that man.

Then please...dont think you're doing her a favor by sleeping with her. Lay down the boundaries prior to her visit. If she's such a good friend, then she'll have to understand without question.

Not shallow at all...very creative. and it leans towards the right thing... meaning in the end, you wontlook like an * * * * * * *!

Hey, I hope you're feeling alright. But here's the truth of the matter. Stop hurting yourself by referring to anniversaries you aren't celebrating. The "what could have been" attitude is pain that is self-inflicted. It'd be incredibly harsh for me to say "toughen up, and drive on!" But lets face it, you have NO OTHER OPTION! I hope to god she is only a smile when you think about it later. Otherwise, all that bottled up depression, sadness, what have you, denies you the chance to give some other girl, what you gave your ex. The way I see it, you're being GROSSLY counterproductive. Take each relationship as a growing pain, and hopefully you can learn from it. If you weren't at fault, then maybe you can takeaway the knowledge of knowing what type of person you belong with. But seriously...stop playing the fake-anniversary game with yourself. Its only going to prevent you from healing.

Dude, what are you like 5? If you're friend isn't proud of your friendship, then are they really a friend. Friends shouldn't be shadows, and only come out when the sun is shining Sorry to be so blunt...but you dont deserve that!

So you are having issues with living with the family. I can tell you, that going away to college was the best thing that ever happened to me. Relationships with my mom and dad improved dramatically,and it was because they didn't have to bicker at me for the small stuff. Unfortunately my eldest sister (I am the youngest of 4) wasn't so lucky. She went to the Local University and was guilted into staying home. As a result, he grades slipped, she dropped the med program, and pursued another major. Eventually her solution was to spend more time at school, in the library, out with the friends. She developed a hobby, took on a job, and even took us out for a movie every now and then. The key is that you are stressed because you are living as an adult, in a household where you were predominately a child for the majority of your stay. The solution is to get out. And if that means with your boyfriend, great!...But respect the idea if he's not too cool with it. Meaning, you need to think of other options for housing. Can you perhaps seek student aid? Are your grades good enough to get scholarship money to aid the costs of any other housing expenses. The problem that I saw with a few of my roommate live-in girlfriends is that they adjust too nicely. They make the apartment thier own. This scares a guy as much as seeing tampons in his medicine cabinet. Side Story: I once caught my girlfriend putting her toothbrush outside of her allocated slot in the drawer. When reaching for my Motrin one day, I noticed this, and quickly addressed the issue that though I loved her presense, she was merely a guest, not a permenant party. Point being, if you do happen to go through with this move in, allow your boyfriend the latitude to make rules. And yes, he may be great enough to say there are no rules. Bull * * * *! Make him set guidelines and boundaries. The last thing you want to do, is alienate him, and more importantly stress the relationship by bringing problems home...to his home! Lastly, if the Boyfriend is so supportive, it is my hope that he understands the seriousness of this issue. That being said, respect his decision regardless. And always look at it from the other point of view. ~John IF this helps feel free to message me with any other issues.

Okay...im just gonna be blunt, and call you out on a few things. First off, as a member of the male sex, im all about getting some nookie. But I find your rationale both disturbing and idiotic. From your post I gather these basic facts, the other statements were merely to soften the blow of your easily recognizable solution 1. You like this girl 2. You have an Ex who is visiting you Solution: Don't have sex with the ex, and pursue the girl you like. UNLESS..you have feelings for your ex. In which case, don't pursue the girl and pursue the ex. Its quite simple. Why risk hurting yourself, or God Forbid another soul? Either you want to see the EX, or you don't. Don't make it seem like you'd have to go out of your way, I'd bet a dollar you wouldn't be doing anything else worth mentioning! Never put a girl in "reserve." By doing that then, you forego the chance for you to develop a genuine rapport with this girl. If there isn't anything "significant" with this girl, then don't feel guilty about sex with the ex... By presenting yourself with this shred of guilt, it proves you have some feelings that this girl is worth pursuing. If she's worth it...don't disrespect her by putting her on deck, while you swing with the ex, its disrespectful, cruel, and juvenile. Now. You might ask why im being so harsh. Hey man, im just straight shooting here. Your message came accross like you were trying to be "the nice guy." The nice guy will make a choice that will NOT hurt someone...and that includes yourself. If you don't want to be that guy... Then be honest with the ex, tell her your feelings. Let the other girl know your plans for the weekend. But please...don't act like you'd be doing the ex a favor by banging her and then playing it off as "I was trying to be nice." Pity sex is only going to make you the pitiful one!