xentez

ok here goes, there are two exes in contact with me at the mo. one is the most recent who broke up with me (after year and a bit) and the other is from 2 years ago. 1) the most recent one broke up with me start of september after a year and a bit together. she has now got my new mobile number from somewhere and texted me out of the blue yesterday. she says that she wants to be friends etc. i dont know why. i tell her that it i dont think it would work and i dont know if i would end up developing feelings for her again beyond friends but she seems kinda pushy by sayin we can try and "see how things go". whats up with that??? what does she really want do you think??? should i ask her outright if she wants to get back etc??? 2) the ex before her we dated for about a month. never slept together but now she is back in the picture and it seems like she wants to get back together. she is flirting with me etc and we have kissed but she wont tell me that she wants to get back but has told my best mate that she is interested etc. is she waiting for me to make the first move etc???? how do i go about these two situations????? cheers xen

brief history: its been about 7 weeks since my ex broke up with me. she said she fell out of love with me. i had proposed and she said yes and we were talking about marriage, kids, where to live etc etc etc everyday for the past week leading up to the break up. i knew she was texting some bloke from the pub where she worked and i confronted her a few times but she jus denied everything. she broke up with me on the friday over the phone about midnight. she then immediately jumped into a relationship with this bloke. this bloke is 28 (shes 19 this week) and has a two yr old daughter. i know she wanted kids young and so did i and she had a few pregnancy scares whilst with me. anyway. i heard from her briefly last week and again this week. she said she wants to be friends with me. i asked why and she said that we get on but cant be together. so anyways i agreed jus to save arguments sake (i know i know. shoudnt of done but decicded i am gonna wait for her to contact me if she does at all). so its her bday next friday and she says that she wants me there because she would like to see me and her family have been asking after me. (i have been in contact with her mum but havent spoke to her for about 3 weeks. i have decided im not going to initiate anything). i sed that i dont think that wud be a good idea and she says she really wants me to come but if her new bloke asks anything she didnt invite me. i have decided that i am not gonna go cause i know it wud set me back because i do still love her. i dont upset anymore jus think and dream about her alot still. what do ppl make of this. i am confused. shud i send her a text or somthing seeing as tho we are "friends" or jus leave it. cheers in advance xen

jus rung them and they have all decided to stay at there own places. i am really annoyed as well because tonight was planned all week. we havent gone out during the week because we was saving money for tonight and now they all say they have no money. ARRRRRRR sorry jus venting.

ARRRRRRRRRRRR its saturday night and none of my mates have money to go out. it will have been a month tomorro since she ended things and now cause i know we are not going out tonight i have found myself really thinking about her. its a big step backwards for me. i have said in the past that i dont miss her but now i realise that i was angry and now i really do miss her. i still think about her during the week but its ok. now tonight it has really started to get me upset. i miss her and i do want her back but i know that it isnt gonna happen. any ideas on things to do to take your mind off things and keep youself occupied xen

she walked out on me. she was always texting some bloke from the pub she was working in (for the last 2 weeks we were together ) and then left me and got with him (prob the same day). i dont know if i want her back as yet. i doubt she will come back anyway and the decision has to come from her. i have decided to ignore the messages and calls and only contact her when i send a text (which i will send to everyone in my phonebook) saying that i have got my phone back. do you think this is a good way to go???? xen

its been 3 weeks since the break up (she initiated) and 2 weeks no contact by me. i keep getting missed calls on my phone from her and now she starts sending text messages about trivial things. she wants me to get back to her to sort out the phone which is being changed from her name into mine. should i still ignore her. i have written a letter to her which explains everything i was feeling and she said she wasnt going to read it. that doesnt bother me but do i tell her again that i am doing NC or jus ignore her calls and messages like i have been for the past 2 weeks. cheers xen

how would i go about talking to a girl that lives a few doors up from me. i dont know if she is single or whatever jus that she lives a few doors from me. i want to initiate contact but dont know where to start. i see her almost everyday and dont want to make a pratt of myself and still have to see her. its different from a club, bar etc etc xen

hey moto. nice very nice i never thought of it that way. as far as i am concerned now. i was the best thing for her. she doesnt want it. her loss. your post has really lifted my spirits. cheers. now about the next door neighbours girl any thoughts??? xen

now on another point. there is a girl who lives a couple of doors down from me. what is the best way of approaching her. i dont know if she has a b/f etc. i dont know anything about her other than the fact she lives a few doors down xen

thanks desert thats exactly what i have done. i have written a letter saying everything i was a little scared to say in the past. reminded her about some good times and i cant think of anything else i want to say. i am going to put it aside and re read it in a few days. if i change anything i will again put it aside until i dont need to change it and then put it aside once more before deciding to send it. i wont feel stupid i have told myself that this is the last time. i will not contact her again unless she contacts me and wants to get back together/be friends/ wants to know me and if that time comes then i am in the driving seat. jus a little vent but also making sure that i now dont hold and secrets about my feelings and keep wondering what if i said that. after this i wont be able to say anything else. it is the end cheers for all your help xen

it jus makes me physically sick to think of this other bloke who she is now seeing being all over her, sleeping with her, kissing her etc. i cant get it out of my head. what can she see in him. he is 15 years older than her. xen

yer perhaps i will leave it for a few days. i was a little scared in our relationship about telling her the absolute truth about what i wanted for the future, for us etc. i jus want to get it off my conscience, all them what ifs etc. i know we will not get back together mainly because she is with someone new and that i wont get a response. jus needed to get it all off my chest and out of my head so i know that she knows what i was trully thinkin, planning and wanted. does that sound sad, needy etc etc xen

hey i am thinking of writing her a letter. i know that i am not going to get a response but i jus want to tell her what she means to me and what she has given up. do you think this is a good idea. i know people have said in that past that i should write it but not send it, i want her to know tho. this is going to be the last contact i have with her (well by me initiating it anyway). she is seeing someone else so i dont know if that should make a difference or not xen

for about a week before we broke up. it doesnt matter now. i have decided its not worth worrying about. i think my main problem was that i always thought i might be able to get back with her no matter what i said to anyone. but now i know that she is seeing this other bloke i know that i dont want to get back with her. mayb in time i might be able to be friends but nothing more cause i wont be able to trust anything she says to me about her feelings towards me. i doubt we will even be friends anyway. if she want to get together with a bloke who is 35, going bald, fat and wears the same pink shirt up the pub everynight then so be it. (she is jus bout to turn 19 btw) best of luck to her and all that crap xen

i jus found out from her that she is seeing some other bloke. the bloke that she was texting when she was still with me. we have only broken up a week ago. how can she jus drop all her feelings for someone who proposed to her and go out with someone else? havin a really bad day. thought i was getting over her and now this. how can people move on so quickly xen

ok will do. thanks annie i expect i will prob post same time tomorro nite drunk and crying etc etc thanks for talking to me and the advice love ya all xen

sorry one last thing. i am going to a nightclub 2morro night (lads nite etc etc) what if she is there do i say hello and be polite or jus ignore her. i still get on with er bro + sis etc. xen

ok cheers annie24. need to get some sleep now. half 2 in the morn here. i expect i will prob post some other weird post tomorro morning/afternoon. o well you have been a great help. even jus talking to you about her has kinda taken her off my mind compared to a couple of hours ago. it seems weird cause i am talking about her but yet not thinking of her thanks annie 24 xen

ok cool so you think my best bet would be to phone her on wednesday afternoon, and leave a message about meeting up for a coffee? do you really think that she might consider it. not sain she will or wont but in your previous experiences, if i rung you up being the dumpee would you meet me for coffee???? xen

ok cheers still dont understand why she would say yes to marrying me and phoning her mum at 5 in the morning "cause she was so happy". wouldnt she jus say not at the moment or something. i dunno how womens minds work. say one thing mean the other xen

ok cool but i still want to sit down and talk to her about it. she was the love of my life and i have always said to my self that i would only propse to the right girl cause i didnt want to be hurt. now its happened. how can i get her to jus meet for a coffee and talk even tho i know she prob wouldnt. xen

no i didnt ask specifically but i asked what was the matter and she said that she needed some time alone. we had been living together in each other's pockets since about 2 months after we met so.... xen

sorry bout the swaering bit tipsy sooooo.... sorry but another thing is she has told her best friend who is a couple of months younger than her and already has a 11 month old baby that she wished she had her life (as in baby). see what i mean about be as confused as f......... sorry i will leave it there i reallly dont understand how we go to this stage when all she has told me since we have been together has pretty much become a reality. she wanted marriage, i propsed (not straight away bout 7 months later), she wanted kids young (so do i. i want kids in 2/3 years time max 4. i want to be a young dad) everything that she said she wanted in life in the early stages of our relationship (which everyone seems to agree with i.e. family friends etc) have pretty much come true. only thing that is (was) left was to move into our own house but yet she knows we was workin on that xen

yer but like you said when she came back to me and wanted to work things out surely she would have said something and not kept quiet about it. why would she come back and then keep everything locked up so nothing could be fixed if poss xen

no thats the point i asked if everything was ok and she always said that it was. everything was fine. i tried to talk to her ask her if she had anything on her mind and yet she maintained that everything was ok right up till friday afternooon and we all know what happened after that. thats the point i am sooooo confused. everything i have thought of turns out not to be something. i have tried talking to her, everything ok, asked bout our future, everything ok confused as {mod edit} xen