Hephaestus

I've recently had an argument with a good friend of mine. It has been weeks since we've spoken. I've tried to contact her in hopes of putting the whole mess behind us. She refuses to talk to me. I've spoken to a few friends of ours about it and they admit she is being childish about the situation. There has also been a lot of new information has surfaced since the argument. Specifically, the possibility that she has feelings for me beyond friendship. Help! I haven't the faintest clue on how to deal with this.

Not to sound too callous, but make a move on #1. If she rejects you, move onto #2. If you hook up with #1 or #2, #3 should get the message that you're just not interested in her.

She's just a friend, but she's always been a little shy around me.

Romantic scenes like asking a girl out, heavy flirting, kissing or making out. For sexual scenes, the 'hiding the face' is even worse.

What would you say about a girl that hides her face when a romantic scene comes up in a movie?

Are you sure? I noticed words like "kind of know" in your reply. I know girls think they are giving all the signals to draw a guy in but if this guy is used to a lot of attention from girls he may not notice something so subtile. If you want him, let him know. I know that I will not lose interest in a girl even if I get approached by a more physically attractive one as long as I'm sure the girl I like likes me as well. If I'm unsure, I might go for a woman that I'm sure likes me.

A guy will not wait around forever. If he begins to feel that your interest in him is simply as friends, he will eventually pursue a girl that will make her romantic interest more clear. If you like him, don't dance around the subject. Tell him.

Ok, just to throw my 2 cents in... both works, depending on the situation. If you know the girl well enough, you can tease her where appropriate. If you cross a line accidentally (you'll know when you do), you can always call her up tell her that you were just teasing and didn't really mean it, you're sorry... etc. Don't suck up, just sound genuinely concerned. Even if she says it didn't bother her, she will remember that you cared enough to call her and make sure she was ok. It's a balance. There are times to tease and there are times to just be sweet and caring. Those times depend on the girl and the situation.

Obvious signs? When I was in high school a girl once dragged her finger accross my back (around the area of the shoulder blades) as she was walking behind me. When I turned around to look, she just smiled. To me, that was an obvious sign. Any excuse you can come up with to touch him. If he's not getting the hint, flirt with him in front of his friends. It will probably be more obvious to them than it will be to him.

I like girls that are a little on the geeky side. I have interests in several areas of science, engineering, biology, technology, computers and art. If she can follow a conversation in any of these areas, I will find her interesting. A good sense of humor that is a little on the dark side if possible. Not easily offended and playful is also a plus. I like women who are fit, not necessarily skinny but in shape. Good personal hygiene as well. I usually go for average looking women. Like I said, I like nerdy girls. I do like women who are independent, responsible and have a healthy self-image. More of less a woman who doesn't 'need' a man, but 'wants' one in her life.

I can agree with everyone here. I have a few friends that I've been close to for nearly 10 years now, but our lives are all drifting different directions. I know that this may very well be the last few months I see them. I've made new friends over the past year and have been getting progressively closer to them. I'm still not at the point where I can call them up and talk about nothing in particular. I tried that earlier in the week and got a 'did you need something' reaction from someone I've been hanging out with frequently. I guess I should look elsewhere for friendship.

The reason I ask is because I've had quite a few girl friends over the years. I've been a lot closer to all of them, even the shy ones. This is the first one that seems that distant. I guess I'll just try not to take it personally.

Find out what he likes to do, other than sex, and see if there is something you two could do together. If so, then plan a day where the two of you could get away from the bedroom for a while. If he's not the kind of guy to share his feelings, he's not going to open up to you overnight. You'll just have to spend time with him and chisel away at the wall a little at a time.

I know what you mean. I was approached by a woman that was in the same college classroom as I was. She asked me out to lunch on several occasions and I had some of the best conversations ever when I was with her. We would always end up late to our next classes because our conversations would get so involved. She was also very flirty, so I assumed she was interested. Then one day she off-handedly mentioned her boyfriend... and yes, she really did have a boyfriend, I made sure. Other than having a boyfriend, she was pretty much the woman of my dreams. So, I know what you mean about feeling led on. I don't know if there really is a way to know for sure. The truth of the matter is that a woman can play the 'friend game' until she decides if she likes a guy or not. Although it's deceptive, it's somewhat common. Unless the woman is straight-forward with you from the beginning, you may never know where you stand.

I have a girl friend that I've been getting to know for about six months now. When we were first getting to know each other she would call me or I would call her. After a few months I would do most of the calling (mostly due to my odd schedule), but she would always return my phone calls. Now I make all the phone calls and she won't return phone calls unless we've planned to do something that day. Even when one of us has to cut a conversation short, I'll tell her "give be a call back when you have a chance" but she never does. I've asked her point blank if I'm making her uncomfortable or if I've done something to upset her and she gave me a shocked look and said "no." She always seems to want to hang out (she's never refused an invitation) but I just feel like we're not communicating like we used to. This change in behavior seems odd to me. I can't help the feeling that something is wrong. Is this friendship doomed to failure?