sarsapolis6

Hi, sorry that this is a long story but I wanted to get some frustrations out.. I noticed some things wrong about today: When I first introduced myself to the class I was very articulate in speaking and mentioned one of my likes..which is soccer. I noticed that when others introduced themselves they unintentionally made a statement that made everyone laugh. No problem.. Then, we did one of those "Get To Know You Games", and some people laughed at the comments people made when they realized that they were "IT". For example, one girl said... "All my neighborhors who..love how to swim." This one guy said in mock horror, "Ohmigod.." And everyone laughed. Besides two people, no one knew each other before this event but it seemed that some of the people already felt good about this guy..meaning that they weren't threatened by his prescense. This rarely happens to me. During the break when I went in the next room for pizza and drinks, no one really came up to me to start a conversation, and I had previously mentioned that my favorite sport is soccer. It's very rare for people to come up to me and talk..but how the hell can I be threatening if I'm wearing glasses, a collar shirt, khaki pants and nice shoes? Is it bad vibes? It certainly can't be that the others had "things on their mind" because here's why: The people were broken down into two camps.. mentors who work full-time at jobs and were already college graduated (who were probably at my age and older), and the mentees who were still in highschool. One girl was a freshman in college but she knew one of the mentors and talked only with the lady because she comfortable talking with a familiar face. The mentors, of course all had things in common..came from prestigious schools, laid off but had years of corporate experience under their belt. And then there's me..I am in college, but what I didn't do was talk with the people who were the mentors, and that was a big mistake. Looking back, the reason why is because I felt a little intimidated, and didn't know WHAT TO TALK ABOUT. If we all carried our conversations in a bag instead of our brains, then mine would be empty. In any case I felt like I was in the middle.. I was already in college, but didn't graduate yet. I already had a job (in construction, compared to the white collar workers that the mentors were) but unlike the other participants I was there to change it. Also, the youth all knew each other from their school..so they were pretty tight and I could see they were more comfortable talking in amongst themselves. So, trying to fit in I stood around eating pizza between the mentors and mentees, and felt nervous that I was literally the only one (besides the teacher) who was by himself while conversation went on. So I decided to talk to the mentees and felt nervous about that too because part of me was like, "shouldn't I be talking to the people older than me?" Also, it took me a while to ask the students a question about their program..I just stood there similar to what a wallflower does at a party. When I did initiate a conversation with them, I made the mistake of not looking relaxed, because in my mind I was fumbling for things to talk about. None of the students asked me questions about myself at all, except for the mentors later on. So I talked with my arms crossed and practically stood there in a semi-circle. One student commented about how we were talking in a semi-circle, and this one girl (who I know didn't like me from the start) imitated me with her arm crossing. I think if I had seen myself I probably would've looked wayyyy to serious and uptight, and I think the students got those negative vibes from me. Another thing that I flubbed on was saying short answers in the conversation, like "Yeah that's cool." I needed to elaborate more. So, the two main problems I have in conversations currently is how to remember to talk about certain things that I've read, seen, or experienced myself, AND how to conduct better responses to what a person says. Looking back, I think I might've had more of a success with talking about various subjects if I had cloaked amongst the mentors. I am more of a listener in a conversation and then when the time is right or I'm thinking about something thoroughly, then I'll say what I have to say. I want to get out othe "wait and strike" mode because some of the best, energetic speakers are the ones who could belt out any type of topic and stay on it without missing a beat. So what makes a person better at forming fun conversations or remembering interesting topics? Reading books? Learning information online? Overall, I felt that I didn't connect well with most of the people in the workshop, except for my mentor. Our set up was tables arranged in a big semicircle U, and I was at the end of the U, meaning that there was no one else to talk to except my mentor. Where a person is in the room doesn't mean anything though when you talk..but for some reason I'm not the kind of person who talks aloud unless it's in a class situation, like if the teacher asks me about something. I would talk to the person closet to me if I wanted to say something about myself, (which I need to do more of) or if I need to ask them about something. Because I will be in many group situations in life, I think I need to really work on "finding my voice" and making my prescense known in the room..in a friendly and sometimes funny way. Right now, I'm going to check out the Learning Annex for a class in group conversation.. hopefully that will help.

personality is like? OR, Is it something where you'll eventually see for yourself once you hang out with her more? (in other words, the question "What's your personality like?" doesn't have to be asked) Also, I am going to volunteer with a girl tomorrow and I plan to take it easy yet I want to show her a couple of things: That I'm an OK, interesting guy to get to know. That I'm a positive person (well, most of the time) who could make someone laugh..or at least smile. (i feel pressured to do this!) That I can be someone whom she'll keep in contact with..because sometimes you might meet someone who's witty, good looking and then unintentionally forget about them a week later. What's the best way to prepare for this? We already have several things in common between us..that is established, but also college.

how to re-solidy friendships or at least an associate-ship (it's a fake word that I just made up ) with guys and girls. My problem is my lack of communication..sure it is normal for some people to lose contact of others, but for me it's almost to epidemic proportions..almost to the point where I have to start off with a whole new set of friends..which is NOT cool. So, would be interested in your responses and have a great Spring BREAKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 8)

I have a prema' ejac problem, and one thing i noticed when I masturbate is when I have to piss it's hard for semen to come out. Since this is a natural biological function for a male, have you guys tried to have sex while on the verge of taking a piss? I am not joking. I mean if it stops the semen momentarily, and if you're using a condom anyway then what other problems might come up? (besides that it might get uncomfortable for you after a while)

ulation? Missionary position? Behind penetration? I am afraid that my body will react to quick..plus I've just started kegel exercises.

whenever my classmates talk about sports. My background is not sports related..I used to watch football games but never had the interest to ask questions about it nor actually played on a pee wee football team. What is the best way to gain knowledge in sports besides knowing which team won or lost? Should I watch ESPN Sportscenter or go to ESPN online? Read the newspaper? I try to do that but the information seems to go in one ear and out the other. Now, something like the Canseco's book has captured my attention enough that if brought up in a conversation, I could put my two cents in. But the game-by-game details, which guy is being drafted, which guy would look great with a certain team because of his stats.. I'm lost there.

"If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman." OK, I got that..but what are some real-life examples where you're using your body language and communication dually? Within a social environment like a spoken word open mic party? (i just attended one on Friday and although there was lots of women there, I didn't know what to say or interact when the lights turned on after the show) Also, I am observing how this guy is opening up to women in the class. Anyone who passes by his desk, he makes a comment about them and they smile. It's not something corny like "Hi!" It's more like, "I see that you're pretty relieved to get out of here". What's the best way to communicate your observations to a girl without risking a negative reply from her?

Hi, Has anyone noticed that when we converse with friends or co-workers, we do it in patterns? Example: I'll compliment someone's new hairstyle..A friend shares an opinion about his city's football team. I made a list of the different styles of social conversating. Criteria: PERSONAL OPINIONS OBSERVATIONS COMPLIMENTS SHARING INFORMATION (various subjects, including self) STORYTELLING (mainly about your own experiences, others, or about an event or situation) My question is, what do you do the most when talking with friends or co-workers that you're cool with? What's usually the one that builds connections or friendships the most, besides compliments?

Before a big house party with lots of people that you don't know, what do you usually do to psyche yourself in a positive way? What are your favorite methods?

another friend..and the other friend was the opposite sex? I've always been used to going to places with groups of guys and we would meet girls that we know at the club. But now New Years is coming and I want to hang out with a girl before New Years. So far I've got dinner planned but there's a food drive going on at a hip hop performance bar. The thing I'm worried about the venue change is that she might think that I'm eager to take it up a notch romantically when in reality it's not all that. I like her, been out with her to different events for years, but I feel it would be unethical to pursue a sexual relationship with her. On the other hand, maybe it would be good if the two of us do something where there's alot of lively people milling about, drinking and enjoying the music. We (the two of us) don't have to dance but we could still just be there and feel the vibe. Guys, is this an OK move? Especially if the only things going on Thursday night are club events and boring art gallery showings?

This old myth keeps popping in my head whenever I'm playing sports with a coed group: You have better chances of getting laid with a girl in gym class than the one in your English class Someone told me this..maybe it was my older cousins way back when. Has anyone found love (temporarily) on the courts or off the field? How did it happen? For me, it's never happened because I concentrate so much on learning the sport (like badminton or tennis) that flirting with females comes second. But now.. 8)

solid? I work full-time in the city and my current buddies are still new buddies, (which means that I've got a ways to go before we're tight like Cheech and Chong) and unfortunately the only way to keep in contact with them throughout the week is to call them. But I'm not a phone person and sometimes 2 weeks go by until I contact them at all..on the phone or in person. It's a bad habit and doesn't help me at all because I'm trying to reach a plateau where I don't have to worry so much about calling a friend. But should I make time every weekend to hang out with my buddies in person? I feel like doing that, however sometimes i want to relax (I work as an apprentice in a construction environment) and do nothing. My buddies on the other hand are college students who work part-time and so they actually have more flexibility to do things. The main thing that I don't want to do is portray the image that I'm someone who's anti-social.

Hi, I'm stuck in limbo between my second and third date because even though we're sexually attractive to one another, I still don't know what to say that would take her "over the top". We conversate on topics but for me it's hard to segue into talking about sex as it relates to me and her. So, what are some of the safe and non-offensive sexual innuendos that could sparking sexual feelings from a woman? Complimenting her beauty is something that I've already tried. What's the key to talking dirty without being too much? Thanks