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Wiseman2

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Everything posted by Wiseman2

  1. How old is this lady? Do either of you have friends or family where the other one lives? Just curious why you are pursuing another distance situation when you already know the difficulties and drawbacks? Are you just shifting from one online situation (porn) to another in order to avoid real relationships?
  2. There's nothing wrong with being polite. If you have a more reserved demure personality that's fine. You don't have to become someone else just to get a date. Please continue being true to yourself.a lol of men like shy and demure women so you don't needs classes to be something else. It's better to be a great version of yourself than some flirty juggling version of someone else you don't even want to be and doesn't mesh with your cultural surroundings or personal style.
  3. The next step is arranging a mutually agreeable comfortable time and place to meet. Please don't discuss masturbation and porn with someone you never met. It's sleazy. Wait until you meet in person and get to know each other. It will be difficult with the distance. How do you plan on seeing or visiting each other in the future if your first meeting goes well?
  4. He was trying to let you down easy that he's not ready willing or able to have a relationship at this time. He was being honest and trying not to lead you on. Far from manipulative. You're still rifling through past communication to attempt to relive and undo what happened, which is he simply can't have a relationship with you the way you want. It's up to you to believe him and move forward.
  5. Agree. The coffee was only two weeks ago and he has your information so when they decide to go out you'll probably hear from him. They may only go out every so often. Agree that when you do go out, please don't drape yourself all over him with touching or lip licking or hair twirling and other regrettable embarrassing behavior. Just have fun with the group. He doesn't need a neon sign that says "I'm available". That's for dates not outing with coworkers along.
  6. Try not to lash out at people with preemptive strikes. That type of defensiveness is consistent with the narcissism you claim you're trying to cure yourself if. Insight and alternative perspectives are the enemy of narcissism. Perhaps a bit of open-mindedness and less lashing out would help?
  7. Even though you enjoy her companionship somewhat for now, you seem very incompatible and have a laundry list of complaints about her. Stop stringing her along and set each other free. The only thing you "owe" anyone, including her is honesty and sincerity, not just coasting along with contempt just so you can have company.
  8. Even Monkeys Played Tennis Yesterday🏸 FACET 💎
  9. How long have you been dating? How is your relationship otherwise? What makes you think she's "hiding" something"? Have both of you been tested for STDs? Perhaps she has irritation or discomfort because of that or other problems. Have you even asked her?
  10. How far apart are you? Who contacted who on the app? Why pursue a distance situation if you can't see each other regularly to date or even set up a time to meet?
  11. As long as you're holding a torch for someone else, you'll have trouble dating and being open-minded to the men out there. This seems like armor against being close to anyone at all . Try to focus on why you want unavailable men and reject available men. Perhaps therapy could help sort that out as well as the spinning and ruminating?
  12. It's fine if you want to cut back on porn. However what is the hold up with meeting in person? Is this a distance situation? How can you make anything "official" until you know who this is and meet in person? Please try not to just replace one online habit with another. Make arrangements to meet and date a while.
  13. Basically if you are preoccupied with a fantasy crush, real dates will pale in comparison. So it's understandable you feel like there's no chemistry because you're not giving anyone else a chance. Once you open your heart and mind to others you can free yourself.
  14. How far apart are you and how did you start talking? What is the reason you never met? You did the right thing blocking him when he started flinging insults. Please delete and block him permanently from all your social media and messaging apps. Please consider meeting people in real life through dating apps or social events. This way you can get to know someone by dating and seeing them on a regular basis.
  15. This seems more like getting to know her and her likes and dislikes. Not like getting to know yourself. That seems like a regular part of any relationship. However if you ever part ways all you'll have is what her specific idiosyncracies are more so than any self awareness. Relationships shouldn't bring out the worst in people, if they do it's possible you're with the wrong person. It's also understandable that constantly "working on yourself" is exhausting as compared to living life and being who you are.
  16. That's ok. Maybe they only go out every so often and when they do, you'll hear from him.
  17. Have you met in person? Is this a distance situation? Would you feel more comfortable talking to people in person?
  18. Crazed Lizards Ate My Meal Yesterday 🦎 CREEP 👹
  19. Some Husbands Only Read News🗞️ PALEO 🥩
  20. It doesn't seem like you're being taken advantage of or played, but it does seem like she has other customers and sugar daddies besides you. You are supporting her from afar voluntarily and that's risky business.
  21. Is this happening at work? If so, it's sexual harassment and you can report it.
  22. Sorry this is happening. Do you live together? Do you two ever go out on dates? It seems you're incompatible if you would rather have a committed relationship and he would rather hang with friends and be a party animal.. Rather than focus on "triggering", fo focus on whether you're compatible. He doesn't seem to want to be tied down to a relationship.
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