A bad friend

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend almost 2 years. He has always had this best friend (I don’t know this friend very well personally) that has very bad tendencies. I did not have a problem with his friend, being that I don’t believe in making someone choose between a relationship and a life long friend. Within the past few months, my boyfriend has been hanging out with this friend A LOT. So much that I have noticed extreme changes in his behavior. He has started cursing a lot more, and acting just like his friend. I told my boyfriend I was extremely uncomfortable with his behavior, and it hurt my feelings. He said that he would work on it. I recently discovered that his friend has been disrespecting me greatly, sending my boyfriend mean messages about me and also sending my boyfriend dirty videos of other girls. I have no idea where that even came from, that is so strange to me. I told him that I did not feel comfortable in this relationship anymore due to how much his friend was playing a part in it. My boyfriend told me I was controlling, and he shouldn’t have to pick. I told him I didn’t want him to ‘pick’ anyone. I just wanted him to understand that I felt terrible being in that relationship. I hate knowing that my boyfriend is getting videos of other girls, that he’s allowing his friend to talk to bad about me, and that my boyfriend is starting to treat me the same. Am I wrong for this?

Focus on his behavior, not his friend. He is picking these people. He is cursing, acting disrespectful, etc. Get the focus off the friend completely. Focus on your bf being a jerk.

Your bf is the problem. he should have shut this down, long ago.

Lose your bf, he does not respect or value you.

This friend is trying to break you up by bad mouthing you and showing your bf videos to make you mad. Maybe arrange a holiday with your bf so you can have some time alone so you reconnect and your bf can appreciate and be reminded of how much he loves you. This friend is out to cause trouble between you.

Show me who your freinds are and I'll show you who you are. You should shoose, er I mean choose your friends wisely. Apparently he did not get the memo.

It's all 'bout dem shoose!

Show me who your freinds are and I'll show you who you are. You should shoose, er I mean choose your friends wisely. Apparently he did not get the memo.

 

It's all 'bout dem shoose!

I couldn't agree more.

Your BF is deciding his own behavior. He's picked a jerk for a friend, and he chooses how to treat you. It makes no sense to act like a parent and blame his friend as though you can remove that problem and everything will be fine. That's fantasy.

I'd skip that and leave BF to his own devices. The sooner you get away from the guy, the sooner you'll view him through a clearer lens--and you'll thank yourself for walking away. From there, if the guy ever chooses to turn his ship around, he'll have no problem making sure you are the first to know it. If not, you've dodged a bullet.

Head high, and focus on YOU, not him.